Post Valentine’s Day and the breakup is officially done, and John somehow survived by selling his ring. Then he gets fooled by AI slop and fully believes NeNe is dating Apollo from Real Housewives, so we spiral.

We rage about how expensive Ubers are now, debate if universal basic income will ever happen, and celebrate Jill Zarin getting canceled for the “make America white again” mess.

Sika pays $20 to park for less than an hour at the dermatologist and still has to park her own car, which feels illegal. It’s All Star Weekend in LA so traffic is pure chaos, and we end with John’s unhinged stomach bug saga.