Small Steps

When we make a mistake after setting a goal or making a plan, it can often open the Pandora's box of crappy feelings and negative self talk. Hearing those thoughts can feel so defeating and lead us to make more decisions that don't serve us. Instead of listening to those voices, you can learn to cultivate self compassion and soothe yourself through hard times.

Small Steps in the Show:

• Notice the feelings/thoughts in your body.
• Take deep breaths.
• Remove yourself from an overwhelming environment if needed.
• Talk to yourself like you would your friend/loved one.
• Zoom out and take an inventory of all the things that have gone right/that you did today/that you feel good about.
• Remember that you have more chances to make different choices.
• Journal or taking notes to remember those choices and outcomes, if helpful.
• Read Self Compassion by Dr Kristin Neff
• Try other ways of soothing yourself: movement, rest, hugging yourself, speaking to your younger self.
• Is this something you want/need professional help/guidance with a therapist?

Mentioned in the Show:

Self Compassion by Dr. Kristin Neff

Small Steps Episode 10 with Deirdre Jayko

Small Steps Episode 12 with Kelly Cutchin

Brene Brown

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Making your mental health a priority is just as important as how you're moving and what you're eating. For so many people, there's a deep shame around seeking help in this way, as if it means you're damaged or broken. Writer and mental health advocate Kelly Cutchin is on the podcast today to share her experiences with going to therapy and just how important it can be for your health.

About Kelly Cutchin

Kelly is a mental health advocate, writer and teacher. She's dedicated to helping others expand their creativity, explore pieces of yourself and tell those stories you've never told, but always believed. She's a walking confetti cannon, eyeshadow maven and a pitbull lover.

Small Steps in the Show:

• Check what your assumptions are about therapy and mental health.
• Are those assumptions yours?
• Consult Kelly's free guides for finding a therapist
• Have initial consultations with potential therapists and be open to that not being your person.
• Get clear on what you need from a therapist.
• Remember you're not broken or damaged for going to therapy.
• Remember therapy is like dating.
• Look into different kinds of therapy to find what works for you
• Change therapists if you need to, if you're working on different things as you work though other things or find a different approach.
• Consider deepen your approach beyond the day to day and looking at where things come from.
• Tell people you trust that you're going to therapy.

Mentioned in the Show:

Psychodynamic therapy

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy

EMDR

Erin Brown

Jarrett & Jennie

Small Steps Episode 10 with Deirdre Jayko

Kelly's Guides for First Time Therapy-Goers

Kelly's Website

Follow Kelly on Instagram

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Interested in working with Aimee? Find out information here.

If you've got some food intolerances, foods you're not eating right now, you're on a therapeutic diet, or you're eating a certain way, that could get interesting while traveling or staying with your family. Instead of throwing your way of eating out the window, see how you can take that with you on your next trip, whether that's a vacation or a trip to see your extended family with these tips and tricks.

Small Steps in the Show:

• Before your trip, make a plan.
• Be open and flexible with that plan.
• Communicate and share the plan with others
• Listen to your body when you're eating.
• Adjust what you're eating as needed, based on what's happening in your body.
• Zoom out and reconnect with why you're on this trip/making your choices.
• Be okay with your choices.
• Remember you have more choices to make in the future.

Mentioned in the Show:

Season of Self CareTaylor Gage of She Thrives

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The deep, heavy fatigue that one long weekend of sleep can't fix. A growing resentment and feeling of overwhelm with everything that you do or places you go. These are signs of burnout. Burnout is becoming more and more common as the hustle and grind culture gets more and more glorified and emphasized. Today's guest Deirdre Jayko talks about what burnout looks like and how you can recover from and prevent from happening again.

About Deirdre Jayko

Deirdre is a writer, a lover of astrology, and an all around space nerd. When she's not busy obsessing over planets, she's using her platform to teach tired women how to cut the bullshit out of their lives and take better care of themselves.

Small Steps in the Show:

• Have a daily check in yourself (journaling can be an option).
• Investing money in yourself by buying something small for yourself.
• Get consistent sleep.
• Create a bedtime ritual.
• Set boundaries with people or with things.
• Don't get too caught up in the self care industry or trend chasing.
• Keep your self care tools simple.
• Say and share how you feel, especially with the people close to you.
• Start with small things to express your feelings (Let people know you're working on it).

Mentioned in the Show:

Season of Self Care

Steph Ondrusek

Get Deirdre's Free Burnout Survival Guide

Deirdre Jayko's Website

Follow Deirdre on Instagram

Sign up for Deirdre's Newsletter

Not at My Desk Lunch ebook

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Self care is so important to your physical and mental health. It's having a moment right now and it's so much more than face masks and manicures. How you practice self care is unique to you and what you need right now. In today's show we cover what self care is, why you need it, ways to practice it and how to incorporate it or double down on it.

Small Steps in the Show:

• Do an audit of your day and week to see how you're doing with your self care.
• Reflect on what makes you feel good (that isn't directly in service to other people).
• Try 1-2 of those out to see how they feel right now.
• Make space for them and let your partner/family know.
• Depending on your personality, maybe have an accountability partner.
• Try other things or let things go that don't feel like they're working, if you find you're still doing them.
• Make space for more self care, if you're light on it and you feel like you need it.
• Practice kindness towards yourself.
• See if there's something you can take off your plate.
• Do something you know always makes you feel good that you can easily do.
• It can be as simple as getting sleep and eating a nourishing meal.
• Take note of how that felt in your body/mind so you can catch it sooner next time.

Mentioned in the Show:

Season of Self Care

Small Steps Podcast with Ariana Fotinakis

Steph Gaudreau

Insight Timer

Small Steps Podcast with Marilene Caetano

Chrissy King

Les Alfred

Balanced Black Girl Podcast with Chrissy King

Voxer

Small Steps Podcast #7: Boundaries

Small Steps Podcast #5: Personality Tests

Not at My Desk Lunch ebook

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Follow Aimee on Instagram | Facebook | Pinterest

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In a go go go society that prioritizes hustle, it can be hard to even imagine the option of slowing down and taking anything easy. Even though it's not glamorized, slowing down can be an essential season in our lives. Ariana Fotinakis talks about her recent season of slowing down, how she did it, and why it's important to.

About Ariana FotinakisAriana Fotinakis is an intuitive coach, writer, and avid lover of fitness. After struggling with addiction for over 10 years, she turned her life around by first focusing on her health, and then by focusing on serving others. She now works with women in a variety of capacities from fitness to business, helping them strengthen their connections to their inner guidance systems so they can confidently take action towards big scary goals.

Small Steps in the Show:

• Take a deep breath, pay attention to how it's feeling, notice any areas of discomfort or feelings
• Do a time and energy audit.
• After the audit, look at what you're doing and adjust as needed.
• Look at your intentions.
• Ask why you get caught up in the busyness of life.
• Who are you without all of the other stuff/title?
• Practice the Thoughtful No.

Mentioned in the Show:

Season of Self CareThe Daily Sweat Podcast Episode 30Neghar FonooniThe Daily Sweat Podcast Episode 44The Daily Sweat PodcastAriana Fotinakis's WebsiteFollow Ariana on Instagram | Facebook CommunityWork with ArianaNot at My Desk Lunch ebook

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When the going gets crazy or you're a people pleaser/perfectionist/Obliger, setting boundaries and asking for what need is vital to your health and respecting yourself. This episode covers what a boundary is, how can set one and why they're not bad! Also how you can ask for what you need with you boundaries and your life.

Small Steps in the Show:

• Write down what your needs are, what's important to you and your energy.
• Start practicing boundary setting and saying no with smaller things and people you trust.
• Take a pause before answering a request
• Start asking for smaller things that you need, or have a talk with your partner/family/close friends about bigger things that are important to you.
• Be okay with the uncomfortable things.
• Check in with yourself each day if you've asked for what you need and if you're respecting an important boundary for yourself.
• Be kind to yourself when you recognize you didn't enforce a boundary or ask for what you needed in that moment.

Mentioned in the Show:

The Small Eats Circle Values Printable

Small Steps Personality Episode

Season of Self Care

The Small Eats Circle

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Your entire life doesn't need to revolve around the numbers on the scale, your clothes, or on calorie counting apps. But if you don't know another way, it can be a little scary. My guest Steph Gaudreau talks about how focusing on your health too much can impact your whole life, and could prevent you from being healthy and truly happy.

About Steph Gaudreau

Steph Gaudreau is a holistic nutritionist, weightlifting coach, mindset maven, author, podcast host, cold brew lover, and Lord of the Rings nerd. She believes women have the right to be strong and take up space because the world needs our voices. Liz Lemon is her shero.

Small Steps in the Show:

• Try listening to you body, which can look like a body scan (Sit quietly and notice where you feel tension, tightness, or anything).
• Acknowledging it's okay to feel whatever you're feeling.
• Check in with yourself and see if you're okay with not losing "that last X lbs."
• Practicing gratitude even when life is hard.
• Get some sunlight in the morning for at least 10-15 minutes.
• Zoom out and look at the big picture with how you're eating what you're eating.
• Get your body in relaxed state with deep breaths.
• Be present while you're eating and just focus on eating while you're eating.
• Chewing food well, try for at least 30 chews.
• Slow down your eating.

Mentioned in the Show:

Beth Manos Brickey

Between Meals Podcast

Harder to Kill Radio

The Core Four

Nutritional Therapy Association

Harder To Kill Club Facebook Group

Steph Gaudreau's Website

Follow Steph on Instagram | Facebook | Twitter

Sign up for Steph's Newsletter

Not at My Desk Lunch ebook

Get the full show notes here!

Follow Aimee on Instagram | Facebook | Pinterest

Sign up for the Wellness Wednesdays Newsletter

Interested in working with Aimee? Find out information here.

Please leave this show a rating and review on iTunes!

Personality tests are so much more than what sitcom character you are and what your favorite cereal says about you. Personality tests can be another great tool to understand who you are, what you need, and how you show up in the world. Once you gain that greater understanding of yourself and the words around them, figuring out what works for you, what you need, and how you are can become a lot easier. I'm breaking down some of my favorite tests that have really helped me understand myself more.

Small Steps in the Show:

• Take the tests.
• Share those results with close friends, family, or your partner.
• Have them take the test or tests as well.
• Take additional tests (if you've only taken one).
• Look into them more to really understand what they mean
• Reflect on what could change knowing what you know now. Do you need to let certain things go or add anything in to fit certain parts of your personality better?

Mentioned in the Show:

Season of Self CareThe Small Eats CircleMyers Briggs Type Indicator16 Personalities WebsiteQuiet by Susan CainSusan Cain Ted Talk: The Power of IntrovertsDear Introvert BlogFour Tendencies By Gretchen RubinFour Tendencies QuizBetter than Before by Gretchen RubinThe Five Love Languages by Gary ChapmanThe Five Love Languages WebsiteEnneagram Test (paid)Small Steps Episode 4 with Marilene Caetano Small Steps Episode 2 with Steph OndrusekThe Highly Sensitive Person by Elaine Aron, Ph.DElaine Aron's WebsiteThe Highly Sensitive Child by Elaine Aron, Ph.DEmpath Evaluation by Dr. Judith OrloffNot at My Desk Lunch ebook

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We hear a lot about self care these days. We're talking more and more about our anger, especially with current events. Can they exist together within us? My guest, Marilene Caetano and I dive into how absolutely they can, why that's important, and why anger isn't a bad thing. We also talk about how you can start to practice more self care, and how you can change it's name to work more for you.

About Marilene Caetano:Marilene is a foodie, mama and feminist living in Toronto Canada. By day she is a Nurse Practitioner at a women's health clinic where she supports women in their physical and mental health. By night she is a writer and coach who helps women take really deep care of themselves while living full out. She believes in a healthcare system that honors the mind-body connection and she dreams of the day that we can fully integrate science and psychology in providing healthcare. Describing herself as a quiet agitator who has always challenged the status quo and engaged in social justice work, her greatest challenge to date has been giving birth to and raising her daughter. She is passionate about teaching women how to live an intentional life, make an impact and feel deeply cared for all along the way.

Small Steps in the Show:

• Try a 7 minute ritual each day of whatever you feels good to you, like reading, workout, journaling, meditating, yoga, or walking.
• Try grounding, which can look like: deep breathing, smell something fragrant that you enjoy, put on hand lotion/washing your hand and focusing on that act, going to the bathroom, putting your bare feet on the ground.
• Identify triggers to figure out what made you angry and keep asking yourself why to get to the root of it.
• Consider journaling or writing practice. Start with gratitude and say WHY.
• Build skills around processing your anger.
• Reading The Dance of Anger to get more skills around your anger

Mentioned in the Show:The Dance of Anger by Harriet Lerner, Ph.DMarilene Caetano's WebsiteFollow Marilene on Instagram Sign up for Marilene's NewsletterNot at My Desk Lunch ebook

Get the full show notes here!Follow Aimee on Instagram | Facebook | PinterestSign up for the Wellness Wednesdays NewsletterInterested in working with Aimee? Find out information here.

Please leave this show a rating and review on iTunes!