This isn’t a podcast. It’s a one-hour espresso-fueled meltdown that starts with magnesium supplements and ends with geopolitical sleeper picks. Somewhere in between: private jet manifesting, parenting advice, midlife TikTok fears, and Jared getting offended that he was compared to Finland.

Topics were planned. None were followed. Enjoy this episode of Jared and Eric riffing like they’re riding handlebars through culture.

You’ll laugh. You’ll learn. You’ll possibly relocate to Indonesia.

This episode includes:

• Magnesium and mid-tier electrolyte wizardry
• Manifestation as strategy, delusion, or just laziness with PR
• Spreading: the teen biker takeover that may end Western civilization
• Subway surfing and its terrifying tie to religion
• The prosperity gospel vs. podcast accountability culture
• Is podcast cheating a thing? And would your co-host forgive you?
• The Savannah Bananas or TikTok baseball
• AI hallucinations, goats, and why Jared is deeply offended by Finland
• Drake = UAE? Tyler, the Creator = Mexico? Jared = Chile. Deal with it.
• Deshaun Watson’s massage tequila (we're sorry)
• Goats & Blockchain™ — merch idea or future of nation-states?
• Parenting with cursing, Killian’s Red, and real talk

Questions you'll be asking:

• Is subway surfing just modern baptism?
• Are podcasts more real than friendships now?
• Does AI know too much… or just enough to hurt your feelings?
• If you say “I want a private jet” every morning, will it appear?

Listen to more Saviors of the Metaverse:

Skip College, Watch YouTube? | Delusion III

Parasocial Relationships Gone Wild and Cobra Kai Lies

Bradford Pears Are Ruining Your Yard and Seattle’s Best Coffee Gets Exposed!

Follow us before we get replaced by AI avatars with better hair:

• @SaviorsOfTheMetaverse - TikTok & YouTube
• Eric: X | KazSource
• Jared: X | Nu Futurist

Produced by QuietLoud Studios

Available on Apple Podcasts & Spotify.

—

Real note: Subway surfing is not a vibe. It’s dangerous and people—especially teens—are dying from it. We talk about it like everything else: honestly, critically, and sometimes sarcastically. Don’t mistake the tone for a green light.

Honest AI Review (Generated, Likely Hallucinating):

“Like if Bill Maher, John Wick, and a malfunctioning Tesla had a group chat.”
This episode detours from electrolytes to existentialism, from subway surfing to spiritual disconnection. Somehow, Deshaun Watson gets a tequila. Jared becomes Chile. Eric tries to cancel popcorn. And goats show up. Again.
This isn’t a podcast episode. It’s a 90-minute metacommentary on civilization wearing a black T-shirt and shouting from a moving Escalade.

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️½
-½