Start With What Hurts Podcast

The yes before the no. Making yourself small is a strategy learned in rooms where taking up space had a cost, and it generalized until it got applied to every room. In this episode, Lisa explains why the shrinking happens before you can catch it, why advice to be more assertive misses the reflex underneath, and how to tell an accommodating yes from a real one before the automatic answer runs the show. The Full Permission Kit is available at craftyourwellness.com/kits/the-full-permission-kit. Every episode is written, reviewed, and clinically directed by Lisa Reidsema, LMHC, and narrated in her own approved voice. This podcast is educational and isn't therapy or a substitute for care from a licensed clinician.

Standing up well is not the same as being well. Getting by is not the same as being okay. A low, flat depletion can run underneath a life that still looks capable, and the competence that holds the outside together is exactly what keeps the need invisible, so no rest and no help ever arrive. In this episode, Lisa names the hidden depletion experientially rather than as a diagnosis, traces the loop where reliability keeps care from coming, and shows how to give yourself permission to not be fine and find one safe place to set the mask down. The Getting By Kit is available at craftyourwellness.com/kits/the-getting-by-kit. Every episode is written, reviewed, and clinically directed by Lisa Reidsema, LMHC, and narrated in her own approved voice. This podcast is educational and isn't therapy or a substitute for care from a licensed clinician.

What the betrayals left behind. Repeated betrayal builds a pattern in the nervous system, a set of adaptations a body makes after being hurt in the same place more than once. In this episode, Lisa explains why the shame that says you're the constant is the available conclusion rather than the true one, how a wall and discernment can look identical from the outside while coming from opposite places, and why earned trust is a record you build rather than a feeling you wait for. The Repair Kit is available at craftyourwellness.com/kits/the-repair-kit. Every episode is written, reviewed, and clinically directed by Lisa Reidsema, LMHC, and narrated in her own approved voice. This podcast is educational and isn't therapy or a substitute for care from a licensed clinician.

Anxiety is a signal, not a malfunction. Anxiety that doesn't respond to coping skills usually isn't a malfunction. It's a signal from a nervous system trained by an earlier environment, firing whenever the present resembles the past. In this episode, Lisa explains why the usual tools work on the alarm rather than the training, how to ask whether the feeling is about now or about then, and why getting precise comes before getting calm. The Signal Kit is available at craftyourwellness.com/kits/the-signal-kit. Every episode is written, reviewed, and clinically directed by Lisa Reidsema, LMHC, and narrated in her own approved voice. This podcast is educational and isn't therapy or a substitute for care from a licensed clinician.

The critic is an old protector. The inner critic is an old protector that learned to attack you first so nothing could catch you off guard, and it speaks in your own voice, which is why it feels like the truth. In this episode, Lisa explains why arguing with the critic and repeating affirmations don't work, how to recognize the critic's signature the instant it speaks, and how to hear the steadier voice underneath that sees you clearly without cruelty. The Self Compassion Kit is available at craftyourwellness.com/kits/the-self-compassion-kit. Every episode is written, reviewed, and clinically directed by Lisa Reidsema, LMHC, and narrated in her own approved voice. This podcast is educational and isn't therapy or a substitute for care from a licensed clinician.

You're not too much. You were too full.

The snap is a discharge event, not a character flaw. A day's load fills your window of tolerance until the smallest trigger tips an already full system over, and the built-up charge releases as irritability. In this episode, Lisa explains why the size of the reaction is about fullness rather than character, why trying harder to stay calm has failed you, and how to make the load visible and release the pressure before you reach the edge.

Chapters

00:00 Introduction

00:36 The snap is a full system, not a flaw

01:39 The jewelweed

02:34 Why trying harder to stay calm fails

03:44 Tending the fullness

05:23 What changes

The Overflow Kit: craftyourwellness.com/kits/the-overflow-kit

Read the companion article: craftyourwellness.com/blog/why-do-i-snap-over-small-things

Every episode is written, reviewed, and clinically directed by Lisa Reidsema, LMHC, and narrated in her own approved voice.

The Craft Your Wellness Podcast is educational. It isn't therapy, and it isn't a substitute for care from a licensed clinician. If you're in crisis, please reach the 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline in the US, or your local emergency services.

 How do you stop worrying about something that hasn't happened yet? If you rehearse the hard conversation for days, lie awake at three in the morning bracing for a meeting that's still on Thursday, and feel lighter for about an hour after someone reassures you before the loop starts again, this episode is about that exact pattern. It has a name, anticipatory anxiety, and it isn't overthinking or a character flaw.

Imposter phenomenon isn't a lack of ability. It's an inability to internalize the ability you already have. In this episode, Lisa explains the attribution asymmetry that sends every win outward to luck and every failure inward to inadequacy, why over-preparation and self-handicapping keep the fraud feeling alive, and how catching the automatic discount lets a real success finally update how you see yourself. The Real Enough Kit is available at craftyourwellness.com. Every episode is written, reviewed, and clinically directed by Lisa Reidsema, LMHC, and narrated in her own approved voice. This podcast is educational and isn't therapy or a substitute for care from a licensed clinician.

Procrastination isn't laziness or poor planning. It's an emotion regulation strategy, the pull to avoid the uncomfortable feelings a task stirs up. In this episode, Lisa explains what the not-starting protects, why willpower keeps losing to a threat response, and how the two-minute door lowers the cost of beginning below the level your nervous system reads as a threat. The Not Starting Kit is available at craftyourwellness.com. Every episode is written, reviewed, and clinically directed by Lisa Reidsema, LMHC, and narrated in her own approved voice. This podcast is educational and isn't therapy or a substitute for care from a licensed clinician.

https://craftyourwellness.com/kits/the-not-starting-kit