We all have to face this challenge at some point in our life, whether it is about our relationships, career or business changes, moving to another location or into a new home. I certainly had a few of these "Starting over" episodes. I moved from Hong Kong to Norway, then to London, then Adelaide, Brisbane and eventually Sydney. I have been through a few relationships and career changes, and I can confidently say that starting over can be a really exciting event but it can also be such a drag. It completely depends on the way you look at it i.e. your mindset and the expectation of the outcome. 

Endings are New Beginnings

Endings are often hard for us, no matter we get to plan for it, or it just happens suddenly. Even if we have time to reflect and eventually commit to an end, it can bring up a lot of memories as well as the reasons why this relationship or that business started in the first place. You may know it 100% true in your heart that it is time to let go it doesn't mean it is any easier, it requires courage and trust in yourself.

I remember when I decided to change my career path from economics and social policy to film and advertising. I didn’t consider all that much about the financial trajectory or lifestyle consequences, I was merely banking on passion and intuition. I knew I have to change, and even though I didn’t know where the path would lead me into, I felt I need to give myself a chance to and move on. 

The same with many of my past relationships, I used to say, if the old one didn't come to an end, I wouldn't get to know the next one. But I have to admit, there were times I asked myself, will this ever end? I mean one unsuccessful relationship followed by another. "There are no failed relationships - you learn and grow from each one". When I look back, it was definitely true, but it was just too hard to believe and accept that when I was in the deep of it. 

But we don’t get to be in the deep forever, we move on, evolve and grow. 
So here are my approaches when it comes to starting over:

Adopt a Growth Mindset 

As compared to a fixed mindset, meaning we predict how things will turn out based on our past or beliefs. Try to allow life to surprise us, for the better, and try to avoid to be fixated on the way how things should turn out, be flexible to the notion that something better can come along. You do your homework, take the necessary actions and/or learning that are required for the outcome you desire, but after that, let go and be patient. Just like baking, you just have to let it rise. 

Use Your Heart Intelligence

There will be times when we are not sure if we have made the right decision or if the direction we are taking is right for us. That is normal and healthy. What we need to do is to check-in with our heart intelligence. We often have the answers within us, but we are so busy listening to the noise and our ego-mind chatter. Find a way to get quiet, whether it is through meditation, or going for a swim or walk in the park. Ask your heart what should be your next steps. You can always get an opinion from family or friends, experts, coaches or professionals around you, but remember those are just their opinions, YOU have the answers within you so don't forget to listen to that, as it is the most important one! 

Create Your Support Network

When you decide to start over and to end the last chapter, start preparing for the transition. If it is appropriate, tell those who are closest to you, let them know what kind of help or support you may need.