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The last thing I wanted to admit was that I was not captain of my own vessel. My ego, and its partner, rationalization, would never let go of their control without some kind of outside intervention! Maybe I should say, ‘inside’ intervention. My Spirit was, (as I believe everyone’s Spirit does), poking and pleading more and more. Yes, I had a sense it was there, but I managed to keep it at bay. Each time, after creating yet another shambles of my life, I said that the next time would be different. Now, I knew it wouldn’t improve without help. As it says in the literature, I stood at the turning point and I was ready and willing to ask for His protection and care with complete abandon.