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Are you struggling to understand the deep longings within you, feeling trapped in your marriage, or like the spark has gone dim? In this episode, we welcome back author and licensed therapist Jay Stringer to discuss his groundbreaking new book, Desire: The Longings Inside Us and the New Science of How We Love, Heal, and Grow. 

We talk with Jay and explore what motivated him to write this book, and his research on how understanding your desire dramatically impacts relationships.  Discover how to stop sabotaging your relationship, differentiate from your partner to create a stronger connection, and move from a "freedom from" mindset to a "freedom for" purpose. This conversation is a transformative call to confront your past, heal attachment wounds, and use the disruptive power of desire to build a life and marriage that truly make you come alive.

Interested in exploring your story around unwanted desire? Brad is launching a new Unwanted Journey group with Jay's first book later this month. Find out more

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Are you tired of the endless cycle of failed New Year's resolutions and frustrated by recurring conflicts in your marriage? In this episode, we explore why simply "white-knuckling" your way to change is destined to fail. Discover how persistent patterns, both in yourself and your spouse—from messy habits to communication breakdowns—are often survival mechanisms, not character flaws. 

Learn how to shift from demanding change to cultivating curiosity, a practice that can transform your relationship. We'll show you how to "invite the issue onto the porch" to foster genuine understanding, leading to deeper connection, improved intimacy, and lasting growth. Instead of feeling overwhelmed by a long list of things to fix, find out how focusing on the "why" behind a single issue can bring healing and victory to your personal life and your marriage.

Brad's Freedom Journey Substack

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In this popular episode of SB1 Brad and Kate sit down with therapist, minister, and researcher Jay Stringer, author of Unwanted, to reframe sexuality through the broader lens of desire, intimacy, and healing. Moving beyond shame-based recovery and purity culture, the episode offers a faith-informed, research-backed roadmap for couples navigating betrayal trauma, porn, infidelity, and mismatched sexual desire. With practical guidance on crisis-to-revisioning stages, story work, differentiation, and honoring the low desire partner’s integrity, Jay shows how increasing sensuality, pleasure, and emotional connection restores trust and brings marriages back to life. This episode invites listeners to transform contempt into connection, reawaken desire, and become one with hope and courage.

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In this fan-favorite episode, we are counting down to the number two most-listened-to episode of Still Becoming One. Join us as we dive into a topic many Christian couples wonder about but are hesitant to discuss: oral sex. We tackle the frequent, questions we receive at marriage conferences about whether this act is biblically permissible, why a spouse might desire it, and how to navigate discrepancies in comfort levels. We explore how to build sexual intimacy through a foundation of safety, communication, and mutual honor, especially when addressing sensitive subjects. Drawing from Song of Solomon and our experience as a marriage counselor and relationship coaches, we discuss the importance of moving past cultural shame and misinformation. This episode addresses the power dynamics, vulnerability, and potential past trauma that can create fear or hesitation, particularly for women. Learn how to open a healthy dialogue, understand your partner’s perspective, and explore pleasure together in a way that is honoring, consensual, and strengthens your connection as you are still becoming one.

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In this special rebroadcast, we revisit one of our most popular episodes, ranking #3 in our top 5. We're joined by bestselling author and relationship coach Shannon Ethridge to explore the crucial link between emotional intelligence and sexual confidence within a marriage. We delve into how personal histories, cultural narratives like purity culture, and the vicious cycle of pornography can erode a wife's confidence and create a wide chasm of disconnection. Shannon shares her coaching methods to help couples uncover the root wounds that sabotage their intimacy, reframing "my needs aren't being met" from a criticism into a sacred invitation for deeper connection. The conversation also challenges the traditional view of "negative" emotions, teaching us to listen to anger, sadness, and fear as our wisest teachers. Discover how boosting your emotional IQ, understanding past trauma, and learning to ask for what you need can break cycles, heal divides, and unlock a more confident and fulfilling intimate relationship.

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In this special rebroadcast, Brad and Kate present #4 of their top 5 most popular episodes, featuring J Parker from Hot, Holy & Humorous. 

This episode challenges the transactional view of sex in marriage, reframing desire from "getting sex" to pursuing genuine intimacy—encompassing vulnerability, connection, acceptance, and pleasure. They tackle common stereotypes about sex drive, particularly the harmful idea that men always desire sex more than women, and delve into the experiences of higher desire wives and lower desire husbands. J provides practical advice for higher-drive spouses on inviting rather than pressuring, emphasizing language that fosters connection (e.g., "I need you" instead of "I need sex"), and exploring what sex truly means to each partner. The discussion also highlights how desire often emerges after an invitation and the influence of faith, church history, and culture on beliefs about sexuality

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In this rebroadcast, featured as one of the five most popular Still Becoming One episodes, licensed marriage counselor Brad and relationship coach Kate revisit the common and complex marital issue titled 'My Spouse Isn't Meeting My Needs, Now What?' Maybe you missed it the first time, or want to relisten. Enjoy, and we'll be back with new episodes soon!

They discuss the cycle of blame that often occurs when one partner feels their emotional or sexual needs are unmet, leading to a constant state of irritation and disconnection. Exploring the dichotomy between self-responsibility and spousal support, we emphasize the importance of understanding your own story, communicating your needs effectively, and recognizing the pressures your partner is facing. 

Whether it's the tension between work-life balance and household duties, the differing expectations for connection, or the trap of believing your spouse should make you happy, this conversation offers practical insights for couples to navigate this challenge. Learn how to stop blaming each other, take responsibility for your own well-being, and work together to heal and strengthen your connection, turning a potential point of conflict into an opportunity for growth and a deeper bond.

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Is self-care selfish—especially during the holiday season? We unpack the difference between genuine self-care and imitation self-care and explore the unique resistance men and women face when trying to take care of themselves. 

If you've thought, "I don't have time for self-care", or "What would I do anyway?" This episode is for you! We offer a practical framework to identify what truly restores you and introduce a Self-Care Grid to help you contemplate what could actually give you good self-care!  

This empowering conversation blends faith, marriage wisdom, and mental health insights to help couples build rhythms of rest, reduce stress, and grow closer as they are still becoming one.

Self Care Grid: AldrichMinistries.com/Resources

Groups starting in the new year: AldrichMinistries.com/Groups

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Brad and Kate, licensed marriage counselor and relationship coaches, dive into the vital topic of “doing your own work” and how personal healing impacts marriage health, communication, and intimacy. 

They unpack common church-influenced pushbacks: “we just need to pray more,” “I’ll use accountability,” and “why go back to childhood?”  This episode blends faith, neuroscience, story work, and marriage coaching to help couples break cycles, set healthy boundaries, and cultivate hope and joy.

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In this powerful episode, we dive deep into the complex inner world of men with therapist and teacher Wendell Moss from the Allender Center. Discover the three core, unspoken questions every man is asking:

• "Does anyone see me?" 
• "Does anyone respect me?"
• "Will anyone want me?"

And how the cultural pressure to "be strong" often leads to silence, loneliness, and cycles of addiction fueled by shame and contempt. We explore why so many men struggle with vulnerability, deflect compliments, and fear being seen, even when they desperately desire it. For couples seeking true connection, this conversation offers profound insights into the male experience, unpacking how the fear of powerlessness drives behavior and how to create the safety needed for healing. Learn practical steps to build new, healing counter-narratives in your marriage, repair after conflict, and foster a connection where both partners can finally feel seen and known.

Don't miss Wendell Moss and Dan Allender's recorded webinar: Learning to Read and Understand Men's Stories

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