In this conversation from the Archives, we revisit an episode with Dr Jennifer Finylason-Fife. TWe dive into the complexities of desire dynamics within marriage, particularly focusing on the roles of higher and lower desire spouses.

The discussion highlights the impact of predictability on desire, the importance of self-discovery, and the need for authenticity in relationships. Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fyfe shares insights on how societal and cultural expectations shape women's experiences of desire and intimacy, emphasizing the significance of personal growth and self-awareness in fostering healthy relationships.

Learn more here https://finlayson-fife.com/

Takeaways

Desire dynamics in marriage often shift from high to low over time.

Predictability in marriage can stifle desire and intimacy.

Women often feel societal pressure to accommodate their partner's desires.

Self-discovery is crucial for understanding personal desires.

Authenticity in relationships fosters deeper connections.

Resentments can indicate unfulfilled desires that need addressing.

Propping up a partner's ego can harm both individuals in a relationship.

Intimate marriages require both partners to show up honestly.

Cultural narratives can shape our understanding of desire and intimacy.

Enjoy the show!

On the Xtended version …

Dr Jennifer and I discuss her research with LDS Women and sexuality and desire, as well as my research on the same topic with a conservative Christian population.

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The post Revisiting the Lower Desire Wife | Dr Jennifer Finlayson-Fife #721 first appeared on Sexy Marriage Radio.

In this conversation, Francie Winslow shares her transformative journey from the constraints of purity culture to embracing a vibrant and fulfilling sexual life within marriage. She discusses the importance of understanding sexuality as a divine gift, the need for education and growth in sexual intimacy, and the detrimental effects of silence and shame surrounding women's sexuality.

We also talk about the historical context that has shaped women's views on their bodies and sexuality, advocating for a shift towards embracing the beauty and joy of sexual expression as part of God's design. The conversation highlights the significance of vulnerability and open communication in fostering healthy sexual relationships.

Takeaways

Sex is often viewed as a man's need, which is a misconception.

Understanding one's body and sexuality is crucial for growth.

Silence around sexuality breeds shame and misunderstanding.

Women often lack joy and ownership in their sexuality.

Sexual intimacy is a key aspect of spiritual growth.

Vulnerability is essential for meaningful sexual experiences.

Healing from past shame can enhance sexual relationships.

Sex is a gift that should be celebrated and explored.

Community support is vital for women on this journey. Invite God into your bedroom for healing.

Community and resources are essential for growth.

Experiences in the sex trade highlight the need for compassion.

Sexual healing is crucial for many individuals.

Understanding female anatomy is vital for intimacy.

Husbands should be students of their wives' bodies.

Sexual intimacy should be nourishing, not performance-based.

Enjoy the show!

On the Xtended version …

In this XTD conversation, Francie and I explore the sacredness of sexuality, the importance of community and education in sexual wholeness, and the need for healing in sexual relationships.

We discuss personal experiences that shaped their understanding of sexuality, the role of husbands in nurturing intimacy, and the necessity of bringing light to often taboo conversations about sex. .

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The post Reclaiming Women’s Sexuality | Francie Winslow #720 first appeared on Sexy Marriage Radio.

In this conversation, Dr Joel Salinas and Bob Bordone join me as we explore the often misunderstood nature of conflict in relationships.

They discuss the importance of engaging with conflict rather than avoiding it, emphasizing that conflict can be a sign of love and authenticity. We also dive into the neuroscience behind conflict, the personal thresholds individuals have for conflict tolerance, and the role of identity in how we approach disagreements.

We end with practical strategies for building conflict resilience, highlighting the need for awareness and gradual exposure to conflict situations.

Takeaways

Conflict is often misunderstood and has a bad reputation.

Engaging in conflict can lead to richer relationships.

Conflict is a natural part of any meaningful relationship.

Our brains are wired to avoid conflict due to past experiences.

Awareness of our reactions to conflict is crucial for growth.

Conflict tolerance varies from person to person.

Identity plays a significant role in how we handle conflict.

Biological responses to conflict can hinder effective communication.

Practical strategies can help individuals navigate conflict better.

Embracing conflict can lead to stronger, more authentic relationships.

Enjoy the show!

On the Xtended version …

We explore the neuroscience that is involved in us during and around conflict.

Then what do we do about it.

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The post Conflict Resilience | Bob Bordone and Dr Joel Salinas #719 first appeared on Sexy Marriage Radio.

In this call in show, Kyla and Adam discuss the challenges they face in their marriage regarding intimacy and sexual desire.

They explore how their relationship dynamics have shifted over the years, particularly after having children, leading to mismatched desires and feelings of rejection.

The discussion emphasizes the importance of emotional intimacy, communication, and understanding each other's needs to foster a more fulfilling sexual relationship.

The post Sex Every Day #718 first appeared on Sexy Marriage Radio.

In this episode of Sexy Marriage Radio, Pam and I explore the complexities of sexual intimacy within marriage, emphasizing the importance of meaningful connections over mere technique. Particularly when it come to oral sex.

We discuss the concept of differentiation, the impact of trauma on sexual experiences, and the dynamics of self-confidence in sexual relationships.

Our conversation encourages listeners to engage deeply with their own feelings and reactions, fostering a willingness to change and grow in their sexual lives.

Takeaways

The goal is to enhance and deepen connections in marriage.

Meaningful intimacy is often more desired than mere physical pleasure.

Differentiation is key to maintaining self-identity in relationships.

Reactions to sexual topics can reveal deeper insecurities and anxieties.

Trauma can significantly impact sexual experiences and perceptions.

A strong sense of self can lead to more fulfilling sexual encounters.

Engagement and presence are crucial during sexual activities.

Asking deeper questions about desires can lead to personal growth.

Willingness to change is essential for improving intimacy.

Understanding one's own needs and desires is vital for a healthy sexual relationship.

Enjoy the show!

On the Xtended version …

Many of us have preconceived notions about oral sex. Put another away, knee-jerk reactions.

So how do these reactions impact our ability to experience more pleasure and connection during oral sex?

What steps do I need to take to face these?

Listen to find out.

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The post Better Oral Sex #717 first appeared on Sexy Marriage Radio.

In this episode of Sexy Marriage Radio, Julian Johnsrud, a coach and expert in intentional living and mini retirements, shares her journey of discovering the concept of mini retirements and how it has transformed her life and the lives of others.

She explains that mini retirements are not just extended vacations, but intentional breaks that allow individuals and couples to rest, explore their passions, and deepen their relationships.

Julian emphasizes the importance of identifying one's intentions and prioritizing them during a mini retirement. She also highlights the expiration dates of certain experiences in life and encourages listeners to seize the opportunity to create meaningful memories.

Learn more about Jillian here - https://www.jillianjohnsrud.com/

Takeaways

Mini retirements are intentional breaks that allow individuals and couples to rest, explore their passions, and deepen their relationships.

Identify your intentions and prioritize them during a mini retirement.

Certain experiences in life have expiration dates, so seize the opportunity to create meaningful memories.

Mini retirements are not just extended vacations, but opportunities for personal growth and exploration.

Enjoy the show!

On the Xtended version …

Pam and I talk through our experience with this idea of intentional living and travel. Plus, what we have taken away from these seasons and hope to implement in upcoming stages.

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The post Intentional Living | Jillian Johnsrud #716 first appeared on Sexy Marriage Radio.

In this episode of Sexy Marriage Radio, Pam and I dive into the complex topic of masturbation within marriage.

Our conversation explores initial reactions, societal misinformation, the benefits of self-discovery, as well as a biblical perspectives on the subject.

Dr. Corey emphasizes the importance of open communication and understanding the dynamics of relationships when discussing masturbation, highlighting that it can be both permissible and beneficial, but also potentially harmful if kept secret or misused.

The episode encourages the Nation to engage in self-examination and foster intimacy through honest conversations about their beliefs and practices.

Takeaways

Masturbation is a natural and healthy aspect of life.

Societal myths about masturbation can lead to misinformation.

Masturbation can have health benefits, including reducing cancer risk.

Self-discovery is crucial for understanding one's sexual desires.

The Bible does not explicitly condemn masturbation.

Masturbation can be harmful if it becomes secretive or weaponized in relationships.

Open conversations about masturbation can enhance intimacy in marriage.

Understanding personal beliefs about masturbation is important for couples.

Masturbation should not replace sexual intimacy with a partner.

Self-examination can lead to healthier sexual dynamics in relationships.

Enjoy the show!

On the Xtended version …

What if masturbation is more than just physical?

It is! So what can you do about that to help improve all of your being?

That's what we dive into in the XTD content. You won't want to miss it!

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The post Masturbation and Marriage #715 first appeared on Sexy Marriage Radio.

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On the Regular version …

In this episode of Sexy Marriage Radio, we dive into the complex dynamics of obligation sex and mercy sex within marriage.

We explore how these concepts can create harmful patterns for both spouses, leading to resentment, control, and a lack of genuine connection. The discussion emphasizes the importance of self-reflection and differentiation in understanding one's desires and needs in a sexual relationship.

We hope to encourage listeners to ask themselves critical questions about their roles in these dynamics and to seek deeper connections with their spouses.

Takeaways

Obligation sex can create resentment and frustration in relationships.

Mercy sex is often a way to avoid deeper issues in the marriage.

Self-reflection is crucial in understanding sexual dynamics.

Both partners can feel a lack of genuine connection due to obligation sex.

Differentiation helps partners maintain their sense of self in a relationship.

The higher desire spouse may feel rejected even during sex.

It's important to recognize the harmful patterns in sexual relationships.

Connection is essential for a fulfilling sexual experience.

Asking the right questions can lead to better understanding in marriage.

Enjoy the show!

On the Xtended version …

What can you do when you find yourself in a pattern of obligation sex?

What questions should I ask of myself?

We will answer these questions, and more.

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The post Obligation Sex #714 first appeared on Sexy Marriage Radio.

In this conversation, Dean Pohlman of Man Flow Yoga joins me again as we discuss the importance of self-care for men, particularly through yoga and exercise.

We explore the resistance many men face in prioritizing their health, the significance of consistency in fitness routines, and how adapting exercise as we age is crucial. We also touch on the mental wellness aspect of creating space in our lives and the ripple effect personal growth can have on those around us.

To learn more about Dean check out https://manflowyoga.com/

Takeaways

Men often resist self-care due to responsibilities to others.

Taking care of oneself is essential for being able to care for others.

Exercise can lead to a cascade of positive lifestyle changes.

Sticking with an exercise program is challenging due to societal pressures.

Setting short-term goals, like 28-day challenges, can help maintain motivation.

As we age, we need to adapt our fitness routines to include flexibility and mobility work.

Just because something is normal doesn't mean it's acceptable.

Enjoy the show!

On the Xtended version …

Let's pick up the conversation from Christmas Day episode of is sex an acceptable gift to give?

There are two sides to this ... let's explore them both.

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The post Men’s Health Is Vital | Dean Pohlman #713 first appeared on Sexy Marriage Radio.

In this episode of Sexy Marriage Radio, we discuss the importance of understanding readiness for penetrative sex.

What are the biological markers, communication cues, and the emotional aspects necessary for enjoyable sex for her? And for him?

How does this apply particularly in the context of pain and trauma?

Our conversation highlights the need for both spouses to be attuned to each other's bodies and desires, fostering a deeper connection and understanding in their sexual relationship.

Takeaways

Understanding readiness for penetrative sex involves both partners.

Biological markers include physical signs of arousal.

Communication is key in understanding each other's readiness.

Emotional and mental readiness is as important as physical readiness.

Pain and trauma can affect sexual experiences and readiness.

Exploring one's own body enhances sexual experiences.

Both partners should be aware of their own and each other's bodies.

Enjoy the show!

On the Xtended version …

We explore more about the idea of Collaborative Alliances. What makes them more difficult in marriage as opposed to other relationships?

Sponsors …

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The post When Is She Ready For Sex? #712 first appeared on Sexy Marriage Radio.