Last week I spent a good chunk of my time staring at my screen saying “what the f** am I supposed to do next??”

My schedule was beyond packed.

I work full time. I take on 1:1 clients (come work with me! Your life will transform.) I plan epic retreats. I teach classes outside of my full-time job in the mornings and evenings. I speak in other people’s co-horts and on stages. I’m building a women’s collaborative network in Boston. And, I think the most important component, I really want to be an attentive wife.

After I taught a yoga class on Wednesday night I was WIRED laying in bed. Luckily my husband let me brain dump and just speak my truth.

By Thursday morning, I had a plan of action. I moved some meetings around. I cancelled some things on myself, one of which was filming this podcast twice a week and making it weekly instead.

I gave myself grace and didn’t let myself fall into the pit of despair and paralysis that it will never grow because I am not grinding into the ground.

When I started The Regulation Revolution, I did it because I realized I wasn’t the only one who has a full life that sometimes can get ahead of themselves. It is hard to not spiral into your own mind. And your body will respond in ways that drag you down if you don’t intervene.

I know in my heart of hearts that it is hard out there, but with the right tips and tricks - life can be pretty fucking epic.

What REALLY Is Overwhelm??

Overwhelm isn’t just having too much to do. It’s what happens when your nervous system hits capacity and your brain can no longer triage effectively. The result is that frozen, screen-staring, what the f** am I supposed to do next feeling.

This is a physiological state, not a personal failure. So shut up and compliment yourself right now.

When your system is overloaded, your prefrontal cortex - the part responsible for planning and decision-making - goes offline. You’re not being weak or disorganized. You’re dysregulated and good news is, we can fix that.

The Overwhelm Reality Check

Your Nervous System Cannot Plan From Threat Mode

Research in cognitive neuroscience consistently shows that chronic stress impairs executive function - the brain’s ability to prioritize, sequence, and make decisions. When your cortisol is elevated and your system is in a threat response, you are biologically less capable of organizing your workload.

What does that mean???

You are not failing at time management, your brain is essentially short circuiting.

That distinction matters, because the solution isn’t to push harder. It’s to bring yourself down to baseline regulation first, then plan.

And when you understand the pattern of this coming up, you will be able to catch yourself from the spiral and recalculate.

So here is exactly what I did to stop myself from the spiral of ~despair~.

Step 1: Reframe to the Big Picture

I stopped looking at the week as a massive pile of tasks and asked myself one question: what is my actual goal by the end of this week?

Not everything on the list NEEDED to be completed. I just needed one north star.

Step 2: Move the Things That Don’t Serve the Goal

I looked at what was on my calendar that week and asked whether it was moving me toward that goal or further away from it.

A few things were not.

I didn’t delete them and moved them to the following week.

Out of the week, not out of my life. That difference matters for your nervous system because it likes structure and plans. This can be confused with procrastination, but it is not. It is delegating time for a project where you can focus on it

Step 3: Ask Yourself What You’re Making Harder

I kept asking myself: I can do hard things but what am I making harder for myself?

This is recognizing your ego.

Was I really going to let a podcast about nervous system regulation wreck me?! No. Not around here partner. We practice what we preach.

This will bring your prefrontal cortex back online and interrupt the threat loop.

Step 4: Move Your Body for 20 Minutes

Not a full workout. Twenty minutes. Some days it looks like 10 Min. That’s it!!!

Research from Princeton University found that exercise actually reorganizes the brain to reduce stress reactivity, meaning movement doesn’t just feel good in the moment, it trains your nervous system to respond to threat differently over time. Twenty minutes or ten minutes isn’t nothing.

Sometimes regulation looks like slowing down and breathing. But sometimes, especially when you’re anxious and activated, you need to shake it out. Movement metabolizes the stress hormones your body has been producing. It is not optional when you’re this activated. It is the medicine.

Step 5: Give Yourself Grace OUT LOUD

I forced myself to say one thing I was proud of accomplishing that day. I said one thing I was grateful for. And then I let the rest go.

Not forever. Just for that day.

This is not toxic positivity. This is a deliberate pattern interrupt that signals to your nervous system that you are safe, that something went right today, and that you do not need to stay in alert mode tonight.

The Permission Slip Nobody Gives You

Delegation isn’t failure.

Cancelling something isn’t giving up.

Moving a task to next week isn’t falling behind.

It is how you protect your capacity so you can show up for the things that actually matter.

Like your friends, the work your love, your kids, your family.

Overwhelm lives in the gap between what your schedule demands and what your nervous system can hold. The goal isn’t to do everything. The goal is to stay regulated while doing the important things well.

That’s it. That’s the whole point.

Lots of love,

Tia

I LOVE doing one to one work and if this interests you, shoot me a message! Let’s have a genuine conversation about things you may be struggling with and the life you want to live.

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