This morning I watched the internet do what it does best. Pick a side and go to war.
A doctor posted that trauma isn’t “stored” in the body, only in the brain.Cue the chaos. (which she was looking for by the way)
On one side, people yelling “finally, some science.”On the other, somatic practitioners feeling like their life’s work just got dragged through the mud.
Honestly I sat there thinking… yeah, I see both of you. There’s a lot of noise out there in the wellness space and a lot of black and white in a part of the world that is gray.
There are people selling surface-level solutions, snake oil, and calling it healing.And there are also people dismissing lived, physical experiences because they don’t fit neatly into a clinical box of what they think is “the way.”
Both can exist at the same time.
The Real Problem: We Want Certainty Where There Isn’t Any
We have overcomplicated everything and turned healing into a checklist of “optimization” routines.
Do this.Not that.This is “right.”That is “wrong.”
And if you don’t listen to me, you’re going to get stuck in the same loop forever and just miserable until the end of your days.
Also pay me $15,000 for a Canva template “Guidebook” please and thank you.
We’ve taken nuanced, evolving practices and tried to crown them as the single holy grail to health and how dare you disagree if it didn’t work for you.
But your body doesn’t work like that.
There is no universal formula for nervous system regulation.
What works for me might do absolutely nothing for you. And the thing that saved you, could inhibit me from healing.The second we start speaking in absolutes, we lose the plot.
Terrifying? Maybe.
But if you zoom out… it’s actually freeing. Because there are an infinite number of possibilities on how you could heal your body and mind.
If one thing doesn’t work, you’re not broken forever. It just means you haven’t found your thing yet.
Our body is one big science experiment. We just have to keep playing.
Brain vs Body: A False Divide
The idea that trauma lives only in the brain ignores something pretty obvious:
Your body is always in the conversation.
Your brain perceives a threat.Your body responds instantly.
Muscles tighten.Heart rate spikes.Breath shortens.
That’s not theoretical, that’s happening in real time and we don’t even recognize it.
Think about those prank videos where someone jumps out from behind a door.The reaction isn’t just mental. It’s explosive, physical and usually a yelp escapes out of someones mouth.
Even though your brain will recognize quite quickly that it was a joke and not an actual threat - the body doesn’t always return to baseline just because the threat is gone.
The tension and physical response may exist in our body for weeks, even months afterwards.
Not because your body is “storing trauma” like a file cabinet but because it hasn’t been shown that it’s safe to let go yet.
If you don’t know where to start with somatic understanding - check out this article.
What Science Actually Supports
In a 2023 interview, Dr. Robert Sapolsky spoke about stress as one of the most damaging long-term forces on the body.
Not just the mind. The body.
Sapolsky’s work focuses on glucocorticoids (stress hormones like cortisol) and how they impact the entire system.
Stress hormones are essential for survival in the short term, but damaging when they stay elevated too long.
Think of it this way - a little stress = good and a lot of stress = bad.
This means:
* Stress is not just a thought → it’s a chemical cascade
* That cascade affects brain and body
* And when it becomes chronic, it creates real physical consequences
Sapolsky’s research consistently shows that prolonged stress exposure can:
* Disrupt immune function
* Alter cardiovascular health
* Increase muscle tension and inflammation
* Damage brain structures like the hippocampus
So no, this isn’t just a brain conversation.
But he also makes another critical point:You won’t stick to a modality that you don’t like DOING.
So if you hate meditation - you won’t do it every day. If you don’t like lifting weights in the Crossfit style - you won’t show up to class three times a week.
Which means…
Why “One Method” Healing Falls Apart
We want the one thing to be THE thing that heals us.
The breathwork.The dance.The mindset shift.The protocol.
But regulation doesn’t work like a light switch. It’s adaptive and personal to how our body responds.
Every new experience may require a different response.
And yeah… that can feel exhausting.
I finally figured myself out and now I have to do it again?
I get that. I have been there SO many times before but this is the part of life we need to build resilience around.
There was a time when every setback felt personal.
Injuries. Breakups. Stress. It all felt like proof something was wrong with me. I was like WHAT could I possibly be doing so poorly that karma is kicking me down this much.
When I was so beaten down I decided I needed to shift my mentality so I made a promise to myself. Every doctor’s appointment became a lesson. Every hard moment became data for how I could improve.
Not “why is this happening to me?”But what is this teaching me about how I work?
My dad used to say after heartbreak:
“The next one will be even better because now you know what you don’t want.”
I would come to him crying and be like “this is not helpful” BUT the man had a point.
Because now it’s not failure.It’s refinement on my processes.
Both Sides Are Missing This
When I see the internet go wild, I sometimes imagine myself in the center of it as a mediator.
If I could sit both sides down - the doctors and the somatic practitioners - I’d ask two simple questions:
To the skeptics:Have you ever danced at a wedding and felt joy ripple through your entire body?
To the practitioners:Have you ever had a conversation so deep it literally shifted how you think?
We get so black and white that we forget both ways can be so easily accessible to see their point of view.
Sometimes you move the body to reach the mind.Sometimes you work with the mind to release the body.
It’s not either/or.It’s both.
Messy. Nuanced. Human.
How to Start Regulating Your Nervous System
Not perfectly, just honestly:
1. Get curious, not rigid
Notice what actually shifts how you feel - not what you think should.
2. Track your body’s responses
Energy, tension, breath, sleep - your body is constantly giving feedback.
3. Experiment without attachment
Try things. Keep what works. Drop what doesn’t.
4. Build your own toolkit
Movement, stillness, conversation, rest—there’s no single path.
The second you believe there’s only one “right” way to heal… You start overriding your own signals.
And that’s the exact opposite of regulation.
We need less gatekeeping and more curiosity.
Less “this is the way” and more “let’s figure out what works for you.”
Because your body is a system to understand.
I’m opening a limited number of 1:1 sessions where we explore this together your patterns, your responses, your toolkit.
Just a conversation to see if it feels aligned and also a moment to connect human to human.
There is hope for you, pinky swear.
Lots of love,
Tia
I understand if you don’t want anymore emails but spread the word on how to feel good!
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