Stronger with Andy Wood

Andy and Stacie Wood on building a home with a vision, the habits that hold it together, where phones and club sports fit, and why God doesn't need your family to be ideal.

This conversation picks up where the weekend message left off. Watch "Stronger Homes" first: https://youtu.be/eTb0sc7OKDg

In Episode 4 of Stronger, Andy and Stacie Wood sit down with Ariel Amaro the week Andy taught Joshua 24, "as for me and my household, we will serve the Lord," and they go where a Sunday message can't: the family Andy grew up in (a divorce, a single dad, and a blended family), how the Woods wrote a vision and four values for their home, the model week and the yearly rhythms that keep them on it, and how they handle phones, the car, and kids who would rather be on a device.

Then the hot takes: one activity per kid and the club sports question, church every weekend, when a kid is ready to date, the two things that cover a lot of parenting mistakes, and what Stacie would tell her younger self.

Single parent, blended family, a home you never saw modeled, or kids who are already 14 with no plan yet, this one is for you.

NEXT WEEK
Stronger Generations: what it looks like to pass your faith from one generation to the next.

ONE THING TO DO THIS WEEK
Sit down and answer one question together: what do we want to see in our kids when they leave our home? Write it down. Then start one rhythm this week: a family night, phones away at dinner, or a high, low, buffalo around the table. If you're single or living with roommates, ask Andy's question instead: what habits am I building in my home now that I'll live in the fruit of later? Then send this to a family who needs it.

RESOURCES MENTIONED
Family Vision Guide (vision, values, and habits for your home): https://sbstoragecdnprod.blob.core.windows.net/media/Resources/family_vision_guide.pdf
Hey-O! Stories of the Bible (Saddleback Kids): https://www.amazon.com/dp/0310159253

BOOKS ANDY RECOMMENDS
Shepherding a Child's Heart, Tedd Tripp
Parenting with Love and Logic, Foster Cline and Jim Fay
Raising a Modern-Day Knight, Robert Lewis
Habits of the Household, Justin Whitmel Earley
Sacred Parenting, Gary Thomas

CHAPTERS
0:00 Coming up
0:47 Welcome: God's design for the home
1:31 Episode four: Stronger Homes
1:45 Joshua 24: "As for me and my household"
3:02 Andy's story: a divorce, a single dad, a blended family
5:52 "God doesn't do the ideal. God does the impossible."
7:16 How the home you grew up in shapes the one you build
10:10 A puzzle without the picture on the box
11:07 Where to start: a vision and values for your family
13:30 The biggest win for your kids, and four values that spell WOOD
16:19 Too late to start? "My kids are already 14"
17:15 Lead your home like you lead at work
18:31 Habits and rhythms: Taco Tuesday and the school-morning prayer
19:15 The model week
19:57 Sunday family night and fighting for family dinner
22:33 Yearly rhythms: the family giving summit, vacation, one-on-ones
24:54 Small moments: high, low, buffalo, question cards, Nerf wars
27:27 Expect resistance: tech-free zones and bedtime
28:28 Bedtime stories, the Hey-O Bible, and RJR
29:46 Car time is talk time
31:47 Phones: limits, the age question, blocking social media
34:25 Careful in the real world, careless online
34:57 Hot take: kids on e-bikes
35:32 Church every weekend
38:35 Hot takes
39:05 Andy's go-to parenting books
39:28 When is a kid ready to date?
41:31 "Have you ever lost it with your kids?"
43:45 Two things that cover a lot of wrongs
44:32 Kids' sports and club leagues
47:32 Advice to my younger parenting self
48:34 Couples putting off or saying no to kids
50:32 To the one who isn't sure the home is worth the work
53:11 Stacie: "You're not doing it alone"
55:09 To the parent of a wayward child
57:09 Next week: Stronger Generations

SCRIPTURE IN THIS EPISODE
Joshua 24:14-15 · Psalm 127:3 · Mark 10:13-16 · Galatians 6:9

NEW EPISODES EVERY MONDAY
Every episode: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLOvtcV3aqv-M
Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/podcast/id6812944219
Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/0MhCJU9jhDFc89e5HwigDw
Show site: https://stronger.saddleback.com

Stronger is recorded at Saddleback Church in Lake Forest, California, and every episode starts with what was taught that weekend. Wherever you're listening from, this is for you too. Find a campus or join online: https://saddleback.com

You were never meant to be strong on your own.

#StrongerWithAndyWood #AndyWood #StacieWood #Saddleback #Parenting

Andy and Stacie Wood on the night Stacie was scared Andy would leave, what he said back, and the one idea that has held their marriage for 23 years: it's a covenant, not a contract.

This is a bonus episode, recorded live at Saddleback's marriage retreat. New here? Start with Episode 3, "Are You Married, or Just Roommates?": https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Iq7Q2S5aq1U

The first twelve minutes are their story: the first week of college, the year Andy spent as a cheerleader, the 18-month breakup, the summer he told her the only way she'd be part of the church he was going to plant was as his wife, and the email she ended with two words from a Nicolas Cage movie. Then the hard part: married at 21, broke, opposite personalities, and the season when home was so miserable Stacie asked what would happen if he left. From there, Andy and Stacie walk through why God calls marriage a covenant, how a covenant is different from a contract (the phone-plan story explains it), what "in sickness and in health" costs when sickness actually comes, the night Stacie locked the bedroom door and Andy quoted Scripture through it, why marriage was never meant to make you happy, and five commitments that make a covenant practical: receive your spouse as a sacred gift, put God at the center, close every side door and lock the back door, work on it instead of running from it, and love, cherish, and sacrifice for your spouse above all others. Including your kids.

Whether you're newly married, decades in, or carrying a hard story into a second marriage, this one is for you.

MORE FROM ANDY AND STACIE ON MARRIAGE
Episode 3, "Are You Married, or Just Roommates?": https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Iq7Q2S5aq1U
Bonus: marriage hot takes on conflict, money, and in-laws: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q45wyFL5O6k
The weekend message, "Stronger Marriages": https://youtu.be/XFandtFb3A8

ONE THING TO DO THIS WEEK
Tell your spouse the sentence Andy asked the room to say: "You are the most important person on planet Earth to me." Then close one door. If there's a conversation, a friendship, or an account your spouse doesn't have access to, hand it over this week. And if it's been a hard season, say the three words from the end of the prayer: "You have my yes again."

RESOURCES MENTIONED
The Meaning of Marriage by Timothy Keller
Let Me Be a Woman by Elisabeth Elliot
The Purpose Driven Church by Rick Warren

CHAPTERS
0:00 Coming up
0:54 Welcome: a bonus episode from the marriage retreat
1:31 How Andy and Stacie met
3:03 Andy the college cheerleader
5:03 The breakup: 18 months
6:09 Venezuela, Cambodia, and the ex-boyfriend
7:28 "The only way you'll be a part of it is if you're my wife"
9:06 Two weeks to pray
10:04 The movie night that decided it
12:19 "I choose us"
12:53 Married at 21: the first five years
13:32 Why marriage and family are the need of the hour
15:11 Covenant: what sets a marriage apart
16:20 Genesis 2: bone of my bones
17:57 Matthew 19: Jesus reaffirms the design
19:28 A biblical definition of marriage, and second chances
21:50 Covenant is the language of God
23:51 The cross is the picture of marriage
25:35 The hardest season: "what if he left?"
28:35 Contract vs. covenant: the phone-plan story
29:52 Tim Keller: vows are a promise of future love
30:19 Four differences between a contract and a covenant
31:35 "In sickness and in health" is part of the vow
34:18 The husband who stayed up all night for his sick wife
36:11 The locked door
37:14 The other side of covenant: "we better make it better"
38:20 Marriage doesn't exist for your happiness
39:02 Elisabeth Elliot: marriage is dynamic, not static
40:19 Commitment 1: Receive your spouse as a sacred gift
41:10 Get around a widow
43:12 Commitment 2: Put God at the center
43:41 Commitment 3: Close every side door, lock the back door
45:03 "I will never have a meal alone with a woman"
46:46 Text threads, passwords, and your location
48:56 Commitment 4: Work on it, don't run from it
49:37 Who apologizes first? Stay at the table
51:38 Commitment 5: Love, cherish, and sacrifice above all others
53:37 If you're hanging on by a thread
54:41 A prayer over your marriage
58:56 Thanks for joining us

SCRIPTURE IN THIS EPISODE
Genesis 2:22-24 · Matthew 19:4-6 · Malachi 2:14 · Ephesians 4:26 · Proverbs 19:11 · Ecclesiastes 7:2

NEW EPISODES EVERY MONDAY
Every episode: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLOvtcV3aqv-M
Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/podcast/id6812944219
Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/0MhCJU9jhDFc89e5HwigDw
Show site: https://stronger.saddleback.com

Stronger is recorded at Saddleback Church in Lake Forest, California. This episode was recorded live at Saddleback's marriage retreat. Wherever you're listening from, this is for you too. Find a campus or join online: https://saddleback.com

You were never meant to be strong on your own.

#StrongerWithAndyWood #AndyWood #StacieWood #Saddleback #Marriage

Andy and Stacie Wood on the marriage questions that didn't fit in Episode 3: how to fight, what to do about money, phones at 9:30 at night, what a single person should look for, forgiveness, and in-laws.

This is the bonus round. Watch Episode 3, "Are You Married, or Just Roommates?", first: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Iq7Q2S5aq1U

Rapid fire, on a thirty-second clock Andy ignores: why your spouse is never the problem and what "stay at the table" means when you disagree. Die to yourself on the small stuff (go eat where your wife wants to eat). The class Andy and Stacie took at 21 that changed how they handle money. Why phones need tight boundaries inside the home. What to look for in a spouse: how they treat their family, the wake they leave behind them, and the football-stands test. What Andy and Stacie tell their kids when a couple they know gets divorced. Why forgiveness is not the same as trust, and the Corrie ten Boom story Andy can't tell in thirty seconds. And what to do when parents are too involved in their kids' marriage.

Married, engaged, or single and paying attention, this one is for you.

THE WEEKEND MESSAGE
This conversation started with "Stronger Marriages," taught by Andy and Stacie Wood: https://youtu.be/XFandtFb3A8

ONE THING TO DO THIS WEEK
Pick one hot take and run it for seven days. Phones down at 9:30. One meal where your spouse picks. One thing you've been holding onto that you forgive out loud. If you're single: look at the wake. Then send this to someone who needs the eleven minutes.

RESOURCES MENTIONED
Financial tools and resources at Saddleback: https://saddleback.com/sections/resources/financial-tools/

CHAPTERS
0:00 Coming up
0:39 Welcome to the first bonus episode
1:01 Andy: best advice on conflict
1:21 Stacie: what do you do when you disagree?
2:12 Die to yourself: go where your wife wants to eat
2:20 Andy: best advice on money in marriage
3:03 Stacie: phones in marriage, yes or no?
4:01 Andy: what should a single person look for in a spouse?
5:30 The football-stands test
5:48 Stacie: what do you tell your kids when people you know get divorced?
6:56 Andy: how important is forgiveness in marriage?
7:40 The Corrie ten Boom story
8:51 "I don't think you understand hot takes"
9:05 Stacie: when parents are too involved in their kids' marriage
10:52 One last hot take
10:59 Next week: Stronger Homes

SCRIPTURE IN THIS EPISODE
Genesis 2:24 · Luke 9:23 · Ephesians 4:31-32 · Hebrews 12:15

NEW EPISODES EVERY MONDAY
Every episode: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLOvtcV3aqv-M
Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/podcast/id6812944219
Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/0MhCJU9jhDFc89e5HwigDw
Show site: https://stronger.saddleback.com

Stronger is recorded at Saddleback Church in Lake Forest, California, and every episode starts with what was taught that weekend. Wherever you're listening from, this is for you too. Find a campus or join online: https://saddleback.com

You were never meant to be strong on your own.

#StrongerWithAndyWood #AndyWood #StacieWood #Saddleback #Marriage

Andy and Stacie Wood on how a marriage drifts from lovers to roommates, what working on it actually looks like, and the conversation about sex and intimacy the church usually avoids.

This conversation picks up where the weekend message left off. Watch "Stronger Marriages" first: https://youtu.be/XFandtFb3A8

In Episode 3 of Stronger, Andy and Stacie Wood sit down with Ariel Amaro the week they taught God's design for marriage, and they go where a Sunday message can't: the eight months they ran with no margin and the getaway that reset them, the weekly checkpoint and the shared calendar that keep a marriage current, what to do when the check engine light comes on, and why the difference between working in your marriage and working on it decides what year fifteen looks like.

Then they go where most churches don't: why God designed sex for marriage and what gets in the way of it, what Stacie wishes someone had told her before her wedding, why "consistently kind, then very kind" is a better plan than the gas pedal, and what Stacie says to the wife whose husband is caught in pornography and won't get help.

Married and drifting, married and fighting for it, or single and wondering what to hope for, this one is for you.

BONUS EPISODE TUESDAY
Andy and Stacie's hot takes on money, conflict, and how they work through disagreements. Coming Tuesday, October 6.

ONE THING TO DO THIS WEEK
If you're married: pick one thing this week that works on your marriage instead of in it. A weekly checkpoint, a date, or the conversation you've been putting off. Put it on the calendar. If you're single: write down what you want your marriage to be before you're in one, and pray for the person you haven't met yet. Then send this to a couple who needs it.

RESOURCES MENTIONED
Celebrate Recovery at Saddleback: https://saddleback.com/sections/get-care/celebrate-recovery/
Saddleback Cares: https://saddleback.com/care/
Female by Design podcast (Francie Winslow): https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/female-by-design/id1493541368

CHAPTERS
0:00 Coming up
0:54 Welcome: God's design for marriage
1:57 Episode three: Stronger Marriages
2:19 The Thin Mints story
4:12 What is marriage? Genesis 2:24, Matthew 19, Ephesians 5
6:46 Leaving, cleaving, and what isn't a marriage
8:45 Living like roommates
11:36 Working in your marriage vs. working on it
12:18 Eight months with no margin: the getaway
15:15 If your marriage were a car
17:17 Maintenance: the weekly checkpoint, the shared calendar, date nights
19:39 Getting away, two or three times a year
21:31 When the check engine light comes on
22:01 Keep it current: the four helpful lists
25:10 Agreements
26:50 "Can we schedule time to even have sex?"
28:07 Why the church avoids talking about sex
29:26 Stacie: "All I had heard was save it to marriage"
32:15 Symptom and source: consistently kind, then very kind
34:26 The gas pedal and the brakes
36:22 Getting to the source
38:39 When one spouse wants help and the other doesn't
41:41 To the wife carrying the faith alone
43:27 To the husband who feels like he's failing
46:27 Stay at the table
47:55 To the man with something under the surface
50:43 Bonus episode Tuesday

SCRIPTURE IN THIS EPISODE
Genesis 2:24 · Matthew 19:4-6 · Ephesians 5:28-31 · 1 Peter 3:1-2 · James 5:16 · Matthew 5:29 · Colossians 3:5

NEW EPISODES EVERY MONDAY
Every episode: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLOvtcV3aqv-M
Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/podcast/id6812944219
Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/0MhCJU9jhDFc89e5HwigDw
Show site: https://stronger.saddleback.com

Stronger is recorded at Saddleback Church in Lake Forest, California, and every episode starts with what was taught that weekend. Wherever you're listening from, this is for you too. Find a campus or join online: https://saddleback.com

You were never meant to be strong on your own.

#StrongerWithAndyWood #AndyWood #StacieWood #Saddleback #Marriage

Stacie Wood on what Proverbs 31 actually describes, and why it was never the 1950s housewife. Culture has two boxes for a woman, tradwife or girlboss, and God's design doesn't fit in either one.

This conversation picks up where the weekend message left off. Watch "Stronger Women" first: https://youtu.be/EBL74YWPvdU

In Episode 2 of Stronger, Stacie Wood sits down with Andy Wood and Ariel Amaro the week she preached God's design for women, and they go where a Sunday message can't: why Saddleback got kicked out of the SBC and what the church actually believes about women and leadership, what Stacie says when someone asks if she's a co-pastor, and what Proverbs 31 does to the 1950s housewife.

Also in here: why men are now outpacing women in church attendance and what Stacie thinks is behind it, why a wife is a crown and not a competitor, what Stacie does when a room full of women starts roasting their husbands, the four years the Woods lived in a small apartment on one income, what would have happened if Andy had been the stay-at-home parent, and Mondays with Mom.

Single, married, raising daughters, or the man trying to make room for the women around him, this one is for you.

ONE THING TO DO THIS WEEK
If you're a woman: name one place where you've been living inside a box culture built instead of the design God gave you, and take one step out of it. If you're a man: name one woman around you whose gift you can make room for this week, and do it. Then send this to someone who's in the middle of this conversation.

CHAPTERS
0:00 Coming up
0:47 Before we jump in
1:28 Week two: Stronger Women
2:58 Respond to Scripture, not culture: Jesus and women
6:40 The correction, and the overcorrection
8:03 Men are outpacing women in church
9:08 Why women are leaving
11:00 Headship, helper, and kicked out of the SBC twice
13:32 Who's defining the boxes?
16:19 "Are you a co-pastor?"
17:31 How Stacie started teaching
22:58 A wife is a crown
25:06 When women roast their husbands
28:00 The batting cage
29:52 Working outside the home
32:00 Tradwife, girlboss, and Proverbs 31
35:24 Your kids are being raised by somebody
38:05 Childcare costs and one income in the Bay Area
40:49 "If we'd done stay-at-home dad..."
43:19 Hope for the next generation: Titus 2
44:33 Mondays with Mom
49:45 Stacie's mom and dad
54:51 To the woman who was wounded
57:00 Next week: Stronger Marriages

SCRIPTURE IN THIS EPISODE
Mark 5:25-34 · John 4 · Proverbs 12:4 · Proverbs 14:1 · Proverbs 31:10-31 · Titus 2:3-5 · Psalm 40:2

NEW EPISODES EVERY MONDAY
Every episode: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLOvtcV3aqv-M
Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/podcast/id6812944219
Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/0MhCJU9jhDFc89e5HwigDw
Show site: https://stronger.saddleback.com

Stronger is recorded at Saddleback Church in Lake Forest, California, and every episode starts with what was taught that weekend. Wherever you're listening from, this is for you too. Find a campus or join online: https://saddleback.com

You were never meant to be strong on your own.

#StrongerWithAndyWood #AndyWood #StacieWood #Saddleback

Nobody hands you a picture of what a man is. You pick it up from movies, sitcoms, and whatever your feed served you this morning.

This conversation picks up where the weekend message left off. Watch "Stronger Men" first: https://youtu.be/VtW99uyEH7Q

In the first episode of Stronger, Andy and Stacie Wood sit down with Ariel Amaro, open Genesis 1 and 2, and ask what God designed a man to be. They come back with four words and a man from Scripture for each one: Daniel, David, Joshua, and Joseph.

Also in here: why Stacie lets Andy hold her hand at every crosswalk, why a noise downstairs at 2:30 a.m. is a theology question, what a study of 34 sitcoms found about TV dads, and why Jesus wept over a city before he flipped its tables.

Single, married, raising sons, or married to one of these guys, this one is for you.

ONE THING TO DO THIS WEEK
Look at the four words: leader, lover, protector, provider. Name the one you're winning in. Name the one you want to grow in. Then say both out loud to someone who knows you well enough to tell you if you're right.

CHAPTERS
0:00 Coming up
0:44 Before we jump in
1:39 Why we started this podcast
2:10 Why "Stronger"?
3:34 Three men you'd download traits from
6:32 Every answer came from a screen
7:08 Genesis 1 and 2: the design
11:59 Four words for a man
13:48 Leader: Daniel and the open window
17:59 Lover: David, poet and warrior
22:01 Protector: Joshua and the noise at 2:30 a.m.
24:55 Stacie on crossing the street
29:37 Provider: Joseph feeds a nation
34:16 When you're not living it
37:36 How TV turned dad into the punchline
42:22 Genesis 3: what got distorted
46:08 Jesus, tough and tender
48:56 Next week: Stronger Women
51:38 One thing to do this week

SCRIPTURE IN THIS EPISODE
Genesis 1:27-28 · Genesis 2:15-18 · Daniel 6:10 · 2 Timothy 2:5 · 1 Corinthians 9:25 · Psalm 90:12 · 1 Corinthians 16:13-14 · Joshua 1:6-9 · Genesis 41 and 50 · 1 Timothy 5:8 · Genesis 3:16-19 · Luke 19:41-46 · Romans 5:8

The four words come from Andy's friend Josh McPherson, credited in the episode.

NEW EPISODES EVERY MONDAY
Every episode: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLOvtcV3aqv-M
Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/podcast/id6812944219
Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/0MhCJU9jhDFc89e5HwigDw
Show site: https://stronger.saddleback.com

Stronger is recorded at Saddleback Church in Lake Forest, California, and every episode starts with what was taught that weekend. Wherever you're listening from, this is for you too. Find a campus or join online: https://saddleback.com

You were never meant to be strong on your own.

#StrongerWithAndyWood #AndyWood #Saddleback

There's always more to say than a weekend allows.

Stronger with Andy Wood picks up where the weekend message leaves off, with honest conversations about faith, family, and everything you carry through the week.

New episodes every Monday. Follow the show so the next one is waiting for you.

Stronger with Andy Wood is a weekly podcast about building a stronger faith, family, and community. Every Monday, Andy Wood, lead pastor of Saddleback Church, picks up where the weekend message leaves off and gets practical about living it out in your home and relationships. Real questions, real stories, and one next step you can take this week.

First episode drops Monday, September 21. Follow the show so it's waiting for you.