Hear why you or a loved one could be at increased risk of being piloted by an extraterrestrial like a fleshy, human skin puppet.
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Study Finds Adults Over 50 Should Get Colonoscopy To Determine Whether Aliens Are Controlling You From The Inside

The Topical is the daily podcast from The Onion and Onion Public Radio, and the only podcast brave enough to ask: What if the news had sound effects? Join host Leslie Price each day as he barely scratches the surface of all the day’s top news stories. Journalism isn’t dead. It's using its dying breath to beg you to listen to The Topical. New episodes published every weekday by 5 a.m. Eastern time.

Comedy

News

Politics

Daily News

Leslie Price returns from a months-long investigation to serve as host of America’s only daily news podcast one last time.
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

The Final Episode Of The Topical

Hear why PETA is coming to the defense of these over-bread monstrosities that exist for the sole purpose of having fresh tomato paste extracted from their many teat-like protuberances.
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Papa John’s Comes Under Fire For Cruel Treatment Of The Bulbous, Deformed Creatures That Lactate Pizza Sauce

It looks dirty, and it’s doing a weird thing with its wings. Hear why it would be best if you just didn’t go near it.
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Scientists Warn Americans To Stay Away From That Bird

Hear why these arborists believe that if the fruit’s on the ground, it’s ready to pound.
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Nation’s Arborists Once Again Urge Congress To Lower The Age Of Consent For Trees

Plus, from royalty to recluse, we’ll sit down with a former prom king who now lives anonymously among the commoners.
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Study Finds Adults Over 50 Should Get Colonoscopy To Determine Whether Aliens Are Controlling You From The Inside

Download our free app to listen on your phone