Systematic Leader

Brian Williams is a VP at Prudential and has so much to teach us about being an effective leader. We dig into how music lessons taught him the value of hard work. 

We also talk about cultivating inner change to become a better leader. It’s not easy, but having data is important. What are your goals and how do you expect to reach them? Brian dives into how he does this in his personal life and in his career.

Here are some highlights from our interview:

• How music lessons taught Brian the value of hard work.
• Brian takes on a big role in change management.
• Why transparency helps you lean in and helps you understand.
• Cultivating inner change to be a better leader.
• The importance of celebration when reaching a milestone in a larger goal.
• Mobilizing people and encouraging them to change.
• The importance of leading with humility.
• The “why” behind the “what”.
• How bottom up change can affect how the whole organization works.
• Understanding what problems we need to solve for.
• Noticing when people aren’t participating and how to poke on them to understand what was going on with them.
• How to understand why someone is not engaged at work.
• Being aware of the pain that I was holding in.
• Taking notes on the people that we work with can make a huge difference in our relationships.

I hope you enjoy the interview and find Brian as fascinating as I do. If you have any questions about what Brian talked about and want to dive deeper please reach out to me.

And as always if you have any questions or want to submit a guest for the podcast that you think would be amazing just reach out on Dig to Fly and I’ll do my best to get them on.

You can listen to a similar episode here:

• How to Stay True to Yourself with Brian Clark

Dave Ursillo has so much to teach through coaching and writing. One of my favorite parts of this interview was when he talked about prioritizing passions and desires. It’s the intersection of both that help us build a career that we are proud of. 

When we understand the identity that we construct for ourselves then we can begin to sliver off the things that don’t work and rebuild ourselves into who we would like to be. As you listen to the interview see how you can find little parts of yourself to improve and grow. 

Highlights from the show:

1:17 - What Dave is grateful for.

3:53 - What it is like to be a body aid for someone running for governor.

6:02 - What caused his depression.

8:25 - How he pulled himself out of depression.

9:35 - The identity he created and how he rewrote this view of himself.

11:01 - How Gen Y is wired.

12:09 - Narrative therapy.

17:25 - Getting support when he needed time for a healing process.

24:03 - Dealing with the failure of his first book.

26:04 - Pivoting his career into something more powerful.

30:22 - Uncertainty and freedom are two sides of the same coin.

34:01 - Picking the choices that have the highest upside.

35:20 - Where self-knowledge meets self-expression.

38:29 - Truly understanding the difference between a “want” and a “need”.

41:34 - Prioritizing passions and desires.

46:55 - How do you pivot your career when you don’t feel like you have options.

49:32 - Using an abundance mindset in your career.

53:11 - Understanding the hard to process concept that life is limitless.

You can learn more about Dave Ursillo and his Leadership Incubator by clicking on the links. He is definitely one person that you’ll want to learn more about. 

And as always if you have any questions or want to submit a guest for the podcast that you think would be amazing just reach out on Dig to Fly and I’ll do my best to get them on.

Jan Keck is a brilliant facilitator who helps people build stronger relationships through vulnerability. Too often we are afraid of being vulnerable because of what people might think of us, but when we are vulnerable we can form deeper connections.

In this interview you’ll learn about Jan’s secrets to warming people up to having a real meaningful conversation. You’ll also learn about how to peak people’s interest when you are reaching out to someone and trying to build a relationship with them. He created an amazing series of cards that help people dive deeper in a group or just with a friend. 

Highlights from the interview:

0:59 - What Jan is grateful for.

2:24 - The moment that Jan realized when he realized he needed to improve how he connected with others.

5:54 - Feeling completely comfortable being himself.

6:43 - How it feels to have a deep connection with someone.

7:10 - We need to plant seeds to get to where we want to be with our mindsets.

9:35 - How his relationship with his parents has affected his relationships.

12:57 - The hidden parts of ourselves that can unlock when we have deep conversations.

14:04 - How he reengineered deep conversations at a camping trip into the business that he has today.

16:35 - Great questions lead to meaningful conversations.

18:06 - How to warm up a conversation before you go deep.

19:18 - What does “home” mean to him.

21:50 - How comfortable he is in his own mind and body.

25:36 - How freewriting helps him process his thoughts and emotions.

32:03 - Helping people feel open and honest during a conversation.

37:30 - Truth or dare as a kid.

39:01 - How to help people feel less alone.

44:50 - Creating deeper online connections in our socially restricted world.

48:39 - How to peak people’s interest when you are trying to start a conversation with them online.

55:25 - Understanding the person you are reaching out to and how busy they are will determine how you message someone you want to connect with.

58:16 - What is one thing you can do over the next seven days to build better connections with people.

You can learn more about Jan Keck and his cards that help you ask deeper questions. You can also find out more about him on his Instagram account,

And as always if you have any questions or want to submit a guest for the podcast that you think would be amazing just reach out on Dig to Fly and I’ll do my best to get them on.

Ashley Foxx has a wonderful way of expressing the desire to live a simple life. I love how she admits that she isn’t perfect. Perfection should never be the goal. The goal should be a simpler life that makes you happy.

In this interview you’ll learn about how Ashley started her podcast and how why she continues to grow it. It’s her purpose that I love about her and why I had to interview her. My hope is that as you listen to this interview you’ll find some tiny little nugget that you can use to help simplify your life.

Show highlights:

1:02 - What Ashley is grateful for.

2:15 - How her childhood has led to her present life.

4:39 - How her dad lost his day job and what her family did to survive.

6:10 - Her morning toy ritual as a kid that showed a lot about her personality.

8:26 - Building her podcast.

10:45 - How we can just go on auto-pilot and how to be aware of this.

13:18 - How her mom helped her build up the simplicity habit.

16:44 - Building our empathy.

19:50 - Getting attacked on social media.

24:49 - Why people attack other people on social media.

28:29 - Helping people get unburied out of their clutter.

35:05 - How the pandemic has affected her life.

39:17 - How our expectations hurt us.

40:50 - Digging into your past can help you live a more purposeful life.

42:28 - Societal expectations that kill our happiness.

47:07 - Finding your own simplicity set point.

49:59 - Decision fatigue and how a routine can help.

50:38 - Evening routine.

56:40 - One thing you can do to simplify your life.

You can learn more about Ashley over at Clean Simple Free podcast on Apple Podcasts. She has so many great episodes for you to learn from.

And as always if you have any questions or want to submit a guest for the podcast that you think would be amazing just reach out on Dig to Fly and I’ll do my best to get them on.

Dustin Main is a fascinating entrepreneur. He started a technology business in Canada and after four years he was burned out. He decided to pull himself out as the leader of his business and go travel. He stayed in touch with his employees, but they ran the show. As he travelled he started meeting amazing people and wanted other people to have similar experiences and created his own travel touring company.

We dig into what Dustin was like as a kid and how it’s led him to so many fascinating adventures. How he has built his companies and how he has let a company go because it wasn’t meeting his expectations.

Here are the highlights with my conversation with Dustin:

0:39 - What is Dustin grateful for.

1:25 - What was he like as a kid and how it brought him to create his business.

6:10 - Collecting baseball cards.

7:22 - How Dustin transitioned his out of his business to travel around the world.

10:33 - Demand for helping people see places that are different from the norm.

11:45 - How he overcame a difficult struggle in his business.

16:05 - The little stories we tell ourselves when we are around other people.

17:55 - How we avoid interactions because of the stories we tell ourselves.

20:51 - Understanding how the little things can throw us off kilter.

21:35 - Use this word in place of fear to help you calm your nerves.

22:44 - The fear that occurs when we are being creative.

25:20 - Why struggle helps us be happier as we get older.

28:19 - How to let go of things that aren’t a good fit in our lives.

37:02 - How to deal with perfectionism.

43:01 - Putting stuff out in the world even when it’s not perfect.

47:40 - We forget how to deal with things that don’t come easy to us.

48:39 - Practicing being patient with ourselves.

51:11 - How we judge our effort in a negative way.

54:31 - How to be more you.

You can learn more about Dustin Main over at his website. He also has a book coming out soon. You can learn more about that on his website as well.

And as always if you have any questions or want to submit a guest for the podcast that you think would be amazing just reach out on Dig to Fly and I’ll do my best to get them on the show.

Matt Barker interviews me (Karl Staib) about the Dig to Fly Method. I wanted share it with you because it will give you some more insight into how the Dig to Fly Method works. We talk about my background then we move into how the Dig to Fly Method works to find opportunities in your struggles.

Kendra Wright is one of the most resilient and brave people I know. She doesn’t let her fear get in the way of doing what she wants. In this interview we cover her childhood to how she has built her own successful marketing agency in Austin, TX. You’ll love how she has utilized her blindspots and how it’s helped her get a deeper understanding of herself.

I think you are going to want to listen to this interview more than once. It’s just that good. All the credit goes to Kendra. She made this interview super easy and fun.

Highlights from Kendra’s interview:

1:06 - What Kendra is grateful for.

2:15 - Why we shouldn’t hate on 2020.

3:30 - The importance of gratitude.

4:02 - The gift of growing up with cerebral palsy. 

5:15 - Why she wants everyone to feel included.

7:55 - Finding opportunities in the emotional pain.

9:02 - You are not broken.

10:41 - Why you should assume people have positive intentions.

13:03 - Finding ways to see more of the picture instead of focusing on just a few details.

14:04 - The best perspective to encourage yourself to view, so you live your best life.

14:45 - Learning about her blindspots and how it’s helped her get a deeper understanding of herself.

15:27 - Figuring out her body’s stress signals.

20:49 - How to make incremental progress in your life.

24:49 - How to stay in the present moment.

28:46 - The magic of books.

32:02 - The Year of Fear project.

39:58 - Why our society is becoming more anxious.

42:59 - Why doing into a situation with curiosity is so powerful.

44:18 - Fear of facing conflict.

47:30 - How to track and improve your struggles.

52:10 - How to learn from our choices.

54:20 - Kendra’s challenge to help you dive deeper into your fear.

You can learn more about Kendra Wright over at Hey Kendra. She has a really cool list of ideas to challenge you to step outside your comfort zone over at her site. She is on Instagram at @kendrarockslife.

And as always if you have any questions or want to submit a guest for the podcast that you think would be amazing just reach out on Dig to Fly and I’ll do my best to get them on.

Cynthia Phelps shares her amazing story about dulling her pain with alcohol and how she dug deep to come out the other side even stronger. This interview is close to my heart because if you listen to previous interviews you know that I struggle with my inner bully. Her whole company is based around building your inner ally and understanding how you can create more empathy toward yourself.

You’ll also learn about how entrepreneurs can build their mindfulness practice to help them get unstuck. Here are the highlights from the interview:

0:41 - What is Cynthia grateful for.

1:35 - What was Cynthia like as a kid.

3:20 - How fear and self-doubt started creeping in.

4:29 - Why she dulled her feelings of discontent.

6:01 - How a particular piece of research changed her life.

6:59 - How awareness helps make improvements in your life.

7:36 - The difference between an acute and chronic problem.

8:24 - The practice of self-compassion.

9:02 - Sustaining emotional wellness over time.

10:25 - Creating internal dialog that builds kindness within you.

12:08 - How she struggled with self-worth.

13:29 - Building a mindfulness practice.

17:25 - Stopping and recognizing that you are suffering.

18:40 - Making strategic changes that improve your life.

20:11 - The importance of writing down what you did well at the end of the day.

21:45 - Why humans have a negativity bias.

25:02 - How we see ourselves is how we see the world.

28:15 - How our inner-patterns are holding us back.

30:20 - Fierce compassion.

30:48 - What do you really need?

32:57 - The stuff we ignore keeps coming back to haunt us.

33:33 - The book Nonviolent Communication by Marshall Rosenberg.

You can learn more about Cynthia Phelps at InnerAlly. She also has a Facebook group called Inner Allies.

We also talked about the book Nonviolent Communication. You can check it out on Amazon.

And as always if you have any questions or want to submit a guest for the podcast that you think would be amazing just reach out on Dig to Fly and I’ll do my best to get them on.

Jeff Goins is a wonderful writer and in this podcast we dive deep into the meaning of life and how our brains work. I think you’ll really enjoy the middle part of this interview because Jeff and I dive deep and really explore what it means to be alive.

As you listen to this interview I suggest you tune in when Jeff talks about his mountain climbing experience. He shares his experience that really helped him understand himself better.

Here is the highlights from the interview:

0:22 - Introduction to Jeff Goins

1:12 - What he is grateful for.

2:40 - How much feelings reflect the experience of reality.

4:15 - Noticing the desire to feel the way people expect me to feel.

5:01 - Which thoughts are true?

6:09 - Choosing how you want to look at a situation.

8:55 - We often project our own feelings on others.

9:58 - Dwelling on thoughts.

10:08 - Things that we think dictate our feelings and our feelings shape our reality.

10:29 - The power that our mindset has.

12:18 - The process is to become aware.

13:40 - Your body will know what to do.

16:09 - Tuning into your feelings during a workday to learn from them and keep growing.

18:16 - How you do anything is how you do everything.

22:55 - How money shows us what we value.

26:17 - Fable of sour grapes by Aesop and how it relates to our lives.

29:11 - How do you go after what you want?

34:05 - The perspective of stress that we bring to our lives.

37:10 - How we create the stories in our lives that determine our perspective.

38:29 - Outsourcing your happiness to others.

39:08 - You are the creator of your life.

42:29 - Challenging yourself to build your self-awareness.

45:02 - Life is the practice.

You can learn more about Jeff Goins over at Goins Writer. He talks about writing and creativity. You can also find him at @jeffgoins on Instagram.

And as always if you have any questions or want to submit a guest for the podcast that you think would be amazing just reach out on Dig to Fly and I’ll do my best to get them on.

Brian Clark is one the most successful bloggers turned entrepreneurs the business world has seen. He sold his two most successful businesses in 2018 and 2019. He has now started over with Further and Unemployable.

This was a fun interview because it’s really cool to see how Brian has used his businesses to help his personal growth. When you challenge yourself to find solutions to problems that other people are having you have to dig deep and be willing to make mistakes. It’s the best way to grow.

When listening to this interview I would suggest taking notes as you listen. There are a few nuggets that you’ll take away with you and be able to apply to your business and life.

Here is the breakdown of the interview:

0:55 - What Brian is grateful for.

2:23 - What he was like as a kid and how it led to his entrepreneurial success.

4:58 - What he is like at a party.

5:25 - How his introversion has helped him in his businesses.

6:30 - How my fear of my own anger has forced me to avoid conflict.

8:20 - Why his sense of justice plays a big part of who he is.

10:23 - Pushing outside our comfort zones.

11:37 - Why his company grew bigger than he ever expected.

13:10 - Why he sold his companies.

14:33 - How does Brian stay true to himself.

16:01 - The story is more important than anything else in business.

18:55 - Feeling compelled to go deeper to find happiness.

20:53 - Why people become unhappy in middle age.

25:10 - Why I started my gratitude habit.

27:05 - Why his struggles were so difficult in his twenties.

30:33 - Why focusing on doing the inner work will help reduce your struggles as you age.

33:40 - Internalizing personal development to make it really sink in.

37:03 - The one philosophical question.

40:10 - Why we ditch the things that help us the most when we are stressed.

41:57 - Why an evening routine is so important.

45:45 - The part of my evening routine that helps set up my day for tomorrow.

48:39 - One quick tip that people can apply to their lives to improve their businesses/career

You can learn more about Brian Clark over at Copyblogger and Further. I would suggest joining his Further email list because he sends out great tips on how middle aged people can apply certain ideas to be happier and healthier. 

And as always if you have any questions or want to submit a guest for the podcast that you think would be amazing just reach out on Dig to Fly and I’ll do my best to get them on.