Table Rush Talk Show

Arlina A has been in recovery for 27 years and her mission is to help other people.  Currently she’s filling the hole of helping women to find sobriety inside and outside of traditional recovery.  Much to many’s chagrin it turns out there just may be solutions outside of the “12 steps”.  Arlina is incredibly well read in the personal growth space and can put her money where her mouth is…  She’s funny, fun to talk to, and just an all out amazing women.  She gets into her most recent bitch slap at the end.

Episode notes:

Register for the “Tools For A Good Life Summit” here www.toolsforagoodlifesummit.com

Arlina A from Idaho.   You can find everything Arlina here: www.Soberlifeschool.com

She was the first podcast I was on. And yes I was a little unruly on her podcast:). One day at a time podcast. https://odaatchat.com/ She’s had her podcast 5 years. June 2016. How does that happen? (Tim Ferriss)

Corporate sales history:).   Celebrated shopping and the fan fare wares off.  The “something I said helped her stay sober” moment that outweighed any big check moment.

Arlina’s been sober 27 years. We are not reps for AA lol.

You’ve got to give it away to keep it and I’m greedy so…

Some women don’t want to go to a “He” centered format…

The big book and 12x12 are magical. Take what you like and leave the rest.

Fear of death will manifest differently for women maybe. Men and the warrior mentality. Men are considered disposable…. What is our value?  Those who are able to confront intimacy. Comparison is the thrift of joy.

What you think about you bring about. Be intentional and mindful and look at the positives.  Focus on what you are doing right so you can do more of that.

I’m of the mindset that everyone is doing the best they can with the information they have in the moment. The brain-it’s an efficiency thing.

You can’t hate yourself into wellness. The inner dialogue is just ridiculous.

The whole idea about meditation is to give us a little pause between the thought and the response.  The brains job is to think.  That’s it’s job. But we don’t need to attach ourselves to those thoughts.

Your tool for evolution If you spot it you got it!  You can’t love or hate something about yourself unless it’s something you love or hate about someone else.  The pot calling the kettle black.

But it also works about the people you admire.

Making the popping sound.  “Make the popping sound son.”The sound that you hear when your hard comes out of your ass. Or In a more spiritual way it’s when the veil of denial is lifted.

I had no tools to resolve my pain to resolution.

A little riff on “the steps”…

The distractions (addictions) are endless!

The limitless possibilities are available all the time.

My ability to recognize where I am making mistakes turned out to be my super power.  “I am not what I do”.

Recovery is about recovering our whole selves. The good and the bad.   Can you love your unloveable parts?  Could I meet my dearest charterer defect with empathy and compassion?

If I’m judging others I am really judging myself…. The reverse of that is true as well. George Orwell - You get in trouble your thought crimes.

Oprah riff.  She loves Oprah. Oprah introduced her to all these teachers that have blown her mind and transformed her world.

Marianne Williamson, Gary Zukav, Deepak Chopra, Wayne dyer. “The seed of the soul”, “The Dancing Wu Li Masters”

I quit the corporate life - I could not live any longer not being aligned with my purpose, which is to help others.

The practical solutions that Marianne Williamson offers.  Tell me what you love about men “We’re not complicated…” (and more).  I love her answer of how men are relative to women.

Gary Zhukov - what a sweet sweet soul. Depack’s meditations.  Wayne Dyer. Tony Robins. “Change your mind, change your life”

Who’s the biggest pain in the ass in the world right now?  Politicians.

Aa is not the only way.  There are many paths to recovery.  Addiction is a very complicated issue.  Using people to make myself feel better.   SLAA. Sex and love addicts anonymous.

I’m broken, I’ll never be fixed, I’m hopeless.  At essence we are all basically the same. We are all doing the best we can with the information we have.   There are teachers bringing light and love into the world.  The answers are out there.

Negativity bias.  Confirmation bias. There is no difference. We are all in the same boat.  Often times people aren’t able to move to solution until their pain and feelings are validated.

Tara Brach - RAIN Meditation

What is it that I do want?  That’s a more interesting question then what’s wrong with me…  Ask better questions.  We need to ask better questions.

Vulnerability and transparency and that requires a lot of courage.   I have lots of unpopular options

When someone is sharing at a meeting and someone starts to cry, I hate the tissue distributors. Something is emerging, something needs to come out through tears, the are finally processing their negativity and someone shoved a tissue in their hand.   It disrupts that persons process and I’m like “you fuckers!”  Just let people cry - when they are ready for a tissue they will ask for one.  And more on the “tissue distributors”.

I really do think that “the men should work with the men and the women should work with the women”. An recovery saying.  When you know better you should do better.  Not all (recovery) meetings are created equal. Some (recovery) meetings are very sick.

AA (recovery) is not the only way - people hate to hear that.  We are not doctors, it is not ok to tell somebody to not to take their meditation.

There was a period where I thought I new better - I was confused about my role as a sponsor let’s say.  Where I thought I new better than they did about themselves.

We are always changing.  We are always evolving or devolving.  Are used to think that I knew what was better for other people. I was self-righteous.

When I turned twenty (years sober) my overwhelming feeling was shame.  Shame that I wasn’t “better yet”. That was the thought that came up for me and I was unprepared for it. That kind of shame   Omg I still have judgments. Maybe that was when I started thinking we should focus on our assets.

Instead of looking at how far I’d come I was looking at how far I needed to go. The default mode network. It’s always challenging to break out of that default mode.

Her most recent bitch slap - she had just put her son into treatment. “I didn’t realize how asleep at the wheel I had been”.   At home. I have this workaholism thing.  So that was brought to light. “Like last week!” 

What I know to do is double down on my self care practice.  Why am I distracting so much?  Why can’t I tolerate silence.  Every waking moment was filled with… ( her list is awesome)

(Son is 17)

Drastic change in the way I’m feeling thinking seeing the world.  I was in denial about my kids.  They are video game kids.  They never went anywhere or did anything…. But low and behold…. I was not aware of the facts shall we say.  “I looked good for a while”. I’m awake now. To my codependency.  I was paralyzed by fear.  I was in denial and I didn’t even know it.

I created “Bite me” custom cookies. I’m scaling!  I’m always feeding my brain and it felt like a distraction.  This all came to light last week.  Home Depot.  More doing. I’m exhausted Mischa.  I’m exhausted. 

The biggest blow up she’s seen in recovery. She saw her friend at a meeting in the morning…. And she was dead 3 hours later.   If you have chronic pain go see a board certified addiction specialist.

Talk about a wake up call.  Hence her recovery podcast. The “One day at a time” podcast.

Rebirth stories?  We see so many good things on the daily. Thousands of good things go right every day.   I’ve seen some crazy ass people…. And their lives change. Some people are unrecognizable for the better.  It happens all the time.

Our little worlds are so small.  There’s room for us all.  There’s enough crazy to go around. 

Look for her “Brain Washers Club”. A membership site.

You can find everything Arlina here: www.Soberlifeschool.com.

Start podcasting!  Get the Shure MV88 mobile mic, you can literally take it anywhere on the fly https://amzn.to/2Mnba3Q

Access my “Insiders Guide to Finding Peace” here: https://belove.media/peace    

See more resources at https://belove.media/resources.   

Email me: [email protected]   

For social Media:      

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Going legit at Wells Fargo Home Mortgage leads to great success!  My fears of doing things by the book were totally unfounded.  And I promise I'll get to the "Do the dishes for God" episode. 

Episode notes:

Check out the "Tools For A Good Life Summit" here: www.toolsforagoodlifesummit.com.

I am sure the anticipation is thick…  For the “Do the Dishes for God” episode.  Part of my journey is trying to do things legit.  Can I just do things legit.

Is that what an entrepreneur does…?  Find out what the rules are and then break em without going to jail?

When I worked at WellsFargo Home Mortgage (WFHM) what I was good at was figuring out there systems and then working within those systems.  Now and then you would get your hand slapped. 

When I started there in 2001 many things were coming together for me.  Date, sales, tech, CRM’s, telemarketing, etc.  Building lists, marketing to them, and then getting the phone to ring.

I was good at leveraging the Wells Fargo brand name and the good will.  WFHM has a whole process for getting your marketing approved…  Of course I started by bootlegging, in an ethical way, my marketing.  The issue was that you had to have the disclosures dialed in.  So I didn’t know an better.  I was having a ton of success…  A flier ends up in the wrong hands.  “Hey, these are bootlegged, what are you doing?” So that’s how I would push the envelope.. As for forgiveness and not permission, that was my forte.  And bosses loved me for that and hated me for that.

I had this amazing fear that, Wells Fargo is so restrictive there’s no way they will let me work with my ideas.  Better to bootleg than ask for permission.  Of course when I started going through the proper channels it worked very well AND I was legit all of a sudden.  It was a powerful lesson for me.

I cheated ONE TIME in high school…  I don’t know what possessed me…  But my history teacher saw me, said something really funny, and then let me off the hook in a real funny way.

The fliers, they were done properly.  I was able to have a lot of success and follow the rules.  I was also scared of having my lists scrubbed against the Wells Fargo database.  Of course initially I didn’t care and they were like guess what you should.  It totally worked out because I had my lists scrubbed, had my fliers approved, etc and thrived! 

My god that was a long time ago by now…  I will get to the do the dishes for god the next episode.

My path to legitimacy, for service… 

Start podcasting!  Get the Shure MV88 mobile mic, you can literally take it anywhere on the fly https://amzn.to/2Mnba3Q

Access my “Insiders Guide to Finding Peace” here: https://belove.media/peace    

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Well, I don’t get to the two stories I meant to get to…   But I do talk about my skill set that I am good at recording podcast episodes and what that means…  Also a progress reset on where I currently stand with the projects I’m tasked to do…  Turns out it’s not as all bad as I may have thought.  And that feels good.

Episode notes:

See the Tools For A Good Life Summit here: www.toolsforagoodlifesummit.com

The main purpose of this episode is “Do the dishes for God” story…

It turns out I’m good at recording episodes.  When I say “I’m good at it”.  I’ll do it.  I could literally do it everyday.  If tasked I could record an episode every day.  I read good content out of ACIM…  Books on the bookshelf.  I’m honestly good at rambling about nothing, I’m not saying that’s good.  And it turns out that that’s a skill.

We are tasked to “publish a lot”.  Learn to publish, create that publishing base of content.  Learn how to communicate with your audience.  How to test ideas.  Turns out you have to have your shit together to test ideas.  I am shooting from the hip a lot.  I appreciate your patience in that regard.

I chose podcast.

Where I am behind on many things, one of which is the summit, although I am on task on the summit now.  (I got the required summit docs on DocuSign!  Created the stuff on docusign, got it sent out to the speakers, they are officially signing on docusign, and everyone is happy!) (I feel good about that right now.).

In theory, you were supposed to start the summit starting month 2.  (As it goes in the high end coaching group 2CCX I’m in.)  And been done with the summit end of month 4…

Took me a little bit more to get started lol!  But I am on track.

The publishing that I am doing constantly is a good thing.  Where others may find it hard.  Perhaps I could help other people learn how to publish more consistently?  That is something that I have to offer in the group that I am in.  Because they encourage us to trade services with each other…  Any who it was a pleasant reminder that I am on task on track with some of the stuff although it feels like I am not on track with a lot of the stuff.

I had this vision, when the “Tools Of A Good Life Summit” is done and complete, I am very much looking to go on tour with it…  Go on podcast tour.  Tell people.  It is a good thing to talk about.  A great thing to promote.  I am very excited to have that to lead to get on podcasts.  I think it will be great content for the podcast hosts!  People are thirsty for good content.

…Do the dishes for God.  I think I am going to save that for the next episode.

Another story…  If I treated my wife as nice as I treated that dog that I had…  This is when I was married…  OMG how good my relationship may have been…

Love to all…

Start podcasting!  Get the Shure MV88 mobile mic, you can literally take it anywhere on the fly https://amzn.to/2Mnba3Q

Access my “Insiders Guide to Finding Peace” here: https://belove.media/peace    

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Email me: [email protected]   

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I start going through my nightly inventory; what do I need to talk to my mentor about?  Chicks man.  Which brings up the old GF.  Then I wonder what the hell I’m doing with my life…  And I cap it off with a 6 or 7 minute riff on the definition of “remit”.

Episode notes:

Check out the “Tools For A Good Life Summit” here! www.toolsforagoodlifesumit.com

I honestly don’t know what the hell I’m doing…  I truly, at this point in my life, literally don’t know what the hell I’m doing.

Going over my nightly inventory :).  What do I need to discuss with my mentor?  “Chicks man. Chicks.”  That’s what I need to talk to him about.

My last GF we broke up in November, right before Thanksgiving…  And actually we were just friends…  And I guess we broke up from being friends.  

But I have really been off the market completely.  And kind of liking it :).  But now and then I wonder will I ever date again.  Will I ever be compelled; other than a random, the girl, that I would see walking and crossing paths?

Update on the girl, wha wha wha.  A friend told me.…did I already talk about that?  See I don’t know what the hell I’m doing.

Right now in this moment…  I’m like;  I’ve spent all this money on this coaching program…  I do have a podcast out of it.  “Hey! I got a podcast out of it.”  Yeah me, everybody and their brother and their dog has a podcast…  And a friend says yeah, “and their cat”.  

Just in this moment as I was hunting for more influencers to get on my summit I had a moment of financial insecurity.  What the hell am I doing?  And what am I going to do with my life?  I was talking to Meg… and I was saying “I’m going to be on my death bed and wondering what I am going to do with my life?”

I looked up the word “remitted” today…  And OMG it’s the longest definition in the world…  Here it is!  I’m not going to type it all out :).

Which led to “desist”.  I better look up “Desist”.  You get that too.

Ok - Remitted - 1c; to let attention or diligence slacken: relax.

OMG, I love that, it’s so good.  I was not sleeping well for a bit…  And my mentor was like it’s “stress”.  I was like holy crap is that whats keeping me up.  Stress from the summit.  and I’m paying for it.

Hey bro, why don’t you just relax, that is what relaxing is!

After all the definitions…  Isn’t remit (or remitted) the best word ever!?

I hope you’re listening to this as you’re going to bed and my soothing voice is putting you to sleep.  Or it’s getting you excited for the office if you are listening to it in the morning.

more on remit.  it goes on.

I was horrible in english…  I looked up intransitive, it means, not transitive.  Not transitive lol.  It did nothing for me.  I still do not know what an intransitive verb is.

The noun definition of “remit”…  You’ll have to listen.

Take a jaunt over to Britten and drop the word “remit”!

Start podcasting!  Get the Shure MV88 mobile mic, you can literally take it anywhere on the fly https://amzn.to/2Mnba3Q

Access my “Insiders Guide to Finding Peace” here: https://belove.media/peace    

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Email me: [email protected]   

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I read some notes today after a juicy meditation and such, and go down the list.  Thoughts on "alone".  Quick what is Gods will.  An update on “the girl” (anti-climactic), which of course reminds me of a story!  And some bad ass A Course In Miracles!   

Episode notes:

Sign up for the "Tools For A Good Life Summit" here www.toolsforagoodlifesummit.com

I’d written down some notes after I’d done my meditation and done the ACIM.  I’d contemplated sin, I’d contemplated, I’d contemplated death, I’d contemplated…  If I could see myself in others as sinless I could have that ultimate love.  I love that idea I do.

I’m going to show some vulnerability and read them to you.

What do I fear about my words, about my jovialness, about my thoughts?  I am scared to push people away and be alone.  So what?  It becomes a self fulfilling prophecy.  If I’m not being myself I’m going to not be bringing in the right people.  They will not see me as authentic.

I literally can’t fuck it up!  And I am alone anyway :). I.e not in a relationship.  And I have a lot of alone time anyway.  Ironically I am learning I am not alone…  I am only alone with God.  And I am a part of God and so is everyone else.  So I am alone with everyone, all the time.  The illusion of alone.

I am doing enough, I am enough, and so is everyone :).  God has me doing what he wants me to do right now, because I am doing it.  What’s Gods will?  What’s happening right now.  This old-timer told me that.  A very wise man.  “You know what Gods will is?”  “It’s what’s happening right now.”  God has me doing what he wants me to do right now, because I am doing it.

Update on the girl:  Whahhh whahhh whahhh…  It petered out so fast, before it even  started…  But it was fun to get a phone number.

Which reminded me of a story.  Back when I was in Casper Community Collage, Harvard on the hill.  My roommate Dave tells me…  Talk to two new girls a day, a simple interaction, and you will find yourself a date and/or a girlfriend.  He told me that and I applied it and the results were amazing.  I put action out that way and this really cool girl showed up from somewhere else.  She just plopped in.  You can apply this to anything.  I applied it to sales all the time.  You apply action, the results will come, you just don’t know where from.  I’ve never seen it fail.  It may be as a direct result…  or it may be from a perceived “random” occurrence :).

More ACIM stuff.  “Nothing around you is but part of you…”  “Look on it lovingly and see the light of heaven in it, so you will come to understand all that is given you.”  Those were instructions.

Put your contempt aside and try it!  That used to suss out contempt in me.

Everything I look at tomorrow, every person place or thing, I am going to try to consciously look on it lovingly, no matter what, and see the light of heaven in it.  You know why?  So I will come to understand that all is given me.

Let it rip.  No apologies.  And afford that to everyone else.  Bam!

Start podcasting!  Get the Shure MV88 mobile mic, you can literally take it anywhere on the fly https://amzn.to/2Mnba3Q

Access my “Insiders Guide to Finding Peace” here: https://belove.media/peace    

See more resources at https://belove.media/resources.   

Email me: [email protected]   

For social Media:      

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https://www.facebook.com/MischaZvegintzov    

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Reading “A Course In Miracles” all the time it is always talking about sin, and that sin is an illusion.  And it mentions the word A LOT.  So I go ahead and look it up in the dictionary.  It makes for a lot of fun.  Also a tiny blurb on projecting and all as control freaks who are afraid of death :).

Episode notes:

Register for the “Tools For A Good Life Summit” here: www.toolsforagoodlifesummit.com

I have not done an A Course In Miracles episode in a while.  A feel like the ACIM episodes are very vulnerable for me because I start talking about God and sin and it can feel very dogmatic and I am not a very dogmatic person.  Much of what ACIM talks about is that sin is an illusion, that sin is not real.  That I am not sinful.  That you are not sinful.  That all of us, everybody, and this is the rub, everybody, even the people who you think are sinful.  Are not.  

We are all one…  The illusion of separation, so sin is not real, because we are all what.

ACIM uses the word often.

Here is the definition of Sin according to Webster’s dictionary:

Sin

• 1 a: an offense against religious or moral law.
• 1 b: an action that is thought to be highly reprehensible.
• The more we can see that sin is an illusion, than the better we will feel about others and about ourselves.
• 1 c: an often serious shortcoming or fault.
• I am going all in on this idea that there is no sin.  Can my god be big enough that there is no sin?  If there is an executioner coming to get me, can I smile at him as he opens the door to the executioners room?  Can I believe there is something more/greater beyond me?
• 2 a: a transgression of the law of god.  (That’s pretty heavy)
• 2 b: a vitiated state of human nature in which the self is estranged from god.

I love that, we feel separate.

Vitiated:

• 1 to make faulty or defective/impair
• 2 to debase in moral or aesthetic status.
• 3 to make in affective.

An ineffective state of human nature in which the self is estranged from god!  I love that.  When I am estranged from god I am ineffective.

Sin as a Verb.  Sinned sinning.

• 1 To commit a sin.  To commit an offense or fault.

I love the idea that we are all gods children, everybody.  And so none of us are committing offenses or faults, we are doing the best we can in the moment.

ACIM Chp 23, THE WAR AGAINST YOURSELF, sec "Introduction", 2.4. “It is as certain you will fear what you attack as it is sure you will love as what you perceive as sinless.”  And I thought that was pretty fancy.

Some commentary on that that I am to tired to type cause I’m tired from working on the summit :).

Ok, a big thought people…  So what upsets me, If I’m projecting on to people, If I look at a murderer and think they are bad it is just because I fear death.  The illusion of dying in the right way.  Or the right time.  We are all just a bunch of control freaks who have a hard time comprehending the end.  

Start podcasting!  Get the Shure MV88 mobile mic, you can literally take it anywhere on the fly https://amzn.to/2Mnba3Q

Access my “Insiders Guide to Finding Peace” here: https://belove.media/peace    

See more resources at https://belove.media/resources.   

Email me: [email protected]   

For social Media:      

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https://www.facebook.com/MischaZvegintzov     

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On this episode I am all in on the 2021 Tools For A Good Life Summit!  I am having a ton of fun interviewing the speakers and more speakers confirm.  The numbers are playing out.  And a little rif on my son may just fail a class and not graduate high school! I had to call him out.

Episode notes:

Register here for the Tools For A Good Life Summit  www.toolsforagoodlifesummit.com!  I am all in on the summit.  From previous episodes I realize how much I had been hedging…

But first, please Jesus let Waylon graduate…  I got the email that no father wants!  “Your son is in danger of not graduating!”  As I record this he has 3 weeks left of school and he has an “F” in history.  I’m sorry to call you out Waylon but my god!  He had all A’s last year, but the senioritous and the covid…  

He’s trying, he’s gone from 25% to 37%…  But he’s got a way to go…  I let my guard down for a minute and…  I thought he was on auto pilot and he was on auto pilot to not graduating…

But anyway, I am all in on the summit!  as I was editing old episodes when I recorded this one I realized I was hedging in a big way.  But just confirming again that I am all in :).  Cutting the check was the all all in moment.  As of this recording may 28th I have 5 of the “Tools For A Good Life Summit” interviews done.  Register here www.toolsforagoodlifesummit.com!  

I interviewed Craig Weiner today and he was awesome!  We had a funny moment with his last name…He’s been helping people for 20-30 years.  What a great guy man.

I have interviewed a diverse bunch.  There is a spiritual theme through all of these speakers…  They are all tapped in.

I’ve all of the sudden started clocking the hours.  The universe has helped make space for that.

THe numbers are working to about 1 speaker per 10 emails.  I got a couple of speakers from the 2nd invite sent to speakers.  I.e. invited them again…

Recording podcast episodes has really taken a back seat…  So much of my creative energy has gone to the summit that it seems to be taking from episode recording.  I am 6 weeks ahead so there actually is no sense of urgency :).  

The episode I just edited today, which was recorded 6 weeks ago, I wanted to not publish that episode!  Cause it sucked…  But I published it anyway.

A teaser for my “top tips to going through divorce gracefully” episode.  It’s funny, some people don’t want to go through their divorce gracefully…  They want to fight :).

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After interview #11 Jess Beers and Interview #16 Greg Beckett, I introduce you to the fourth part and final piece of the Flow Group: Meg Gibbs!  Meg has deep deep routes in Native American Shamanism and those style modalities; effectively having grown up in it with her family…  She is also powerful in movement having being a trained dancer since a very young age.  And, of course there, is more to the story…  There are bombs a plenty in this one! 

Episode notes:

I'm still working hard on the Tools For A Good Life Summit register here https://toolsforagoodlifesummit.com/ and actually take all the notes for this episode while I was walking...  Not a bad job!

Find all things Meg Gibbs right here: www.Meggibbs.com

Arc of life.  Megs mom died when she was young.  Breast cancer 3 times. 9 - 24 effectively.  Ended up being primary caregiver.  Best friend etc.  spiritual worker.  Indigenous perspective. Meg effectively got mentored in the buis at a young age.

Grief - I get to decide.  I like toTalk about grief w some sassyness.  Nobody gets to decide what you’re going through but you.  There are some universal truths but…

Mz- Kyle cease. The grief pattern.  I finally feel like I’m on the other side of grief.  My parents died at same time as her mom.

She joined a “the dinner party”. Gone through loss in 20’s and 30’s.

I like her idea of compounding loss…

That feeling of all my heart is being ripped out of my body again. Where other people take a couple days eat ice cream and are back out there… They’re like whatever I don’t care :-)

Don’t cry at the barista just get my chai and leave… Don’t cry at the barista just get my chai and leave.

You’ve got to do it the best way you know how…  I so value people who show up… Even though they know they’re gonna say the wrong thing or do the wrong thing. They still show up.

“That sense of who is that part of me. What is that maybe wants to be rekindled And maybe what part wants to be let go of.

Transition to following her inspiration to become a coach…  When I found Coaching I was like “You mean I get to get paid to have important conversations about people’s dreams and fears and shit that matters…

That’s the rainbow and butterflies version. But that’s not what happened… That’s not how it went.

People think coaching is advice giving. And it’s not.  Coaching is about asking questions and drawing somebody’s answers out of themselves. Out of Their truths. Out of their knowing.  It’s not my job to tell somebody what to do.

So I started a business in the midst of grief…. I didn’t know this was going to be hard. I just knew I’d like to talking to people.   And eight years deep and I’m still trying to figure it out…  We are in this for the long-haul. I signed up for this 10 or 20 year track.

Which direction do you want to go?  Native American Shamanism  and how powerful rich and deep that is in your life. Or the movement exercises and visualizations.

Has an alternative family…. Lesbian moms. Huge gay family. Lots of adopted family.  Was trying to have a normal experience and failing…

When 11 Mom started working with a Lakota teacher so she started working with the Lakota teacher to….  And the Native American shamanism starts from there….

Godfather started the “First Existential Congregation” when she was 6. The first E…

The way I decided which collage to go to is I did a Medicean wheel in the back yard…

I was totally misunderstood in the outer world.

I want to help people feel safe in the world.

Shamanism is how I see the world. It’s very ingrained in how I see the world.

As a child I grew out unblocked.  You told me to go outside and find spirit and that’s what I did.  

When 17 yrs old. Meets her other teacher, Don Mariano, lives in the Andes of Peru. He is a mountain shaman vs a jungle shaman.

This integrated into how I see the world and how I show up in the world. Vs I learned a methodology and now I’m going to teach it to you.

She was in the “AP” class of healers at a young age.   “I’m so weird”.  I came out of the womb with no chance of being normal. And I was so mad about it as a kid. “I just wanted to be a cheerleader.”

I have these kind of seminal moments…

Dance…. The movement thing…  I was 11 when I started dance…. I grew up really fast…. I had joined a conservatory and was dancing in New York by 12….

I have learned to name now “dance trauma”…. The body issue stuff from hitting puberty. I was “voluptuous”.  It was a hard experience. We lied on our resumes about our weight when we were 14.  It was not a realistic standard of how it is to be a person.

At some point I started Choreography and started to focus on the process and creating a sacred place of feeling safe in your body…

At 17 18 my life was over because I was not going to be able to be the professional dancer that I strives to be since I was twelve because my body type wasn’t right.   There’s a meg shaped hole in the universe and I’m the only one that can fill it.  That failure I experienced created the space that I hold for people.

She references “The Liz Lerman Dance Exchange”. https://www.danceexchange.org/.

At one point she works with disabled body dancers…. An amazing combo of humans.  “There’s 17000 other ways to do this”.

The experience of just “being in my body” is probably the most powerful learning that I’ve had in all these years.

(MZ) One of the most powerful things that you did for me…. Find the fun ness!  It’s been huge in my life.  Honoring the little boy in me. I was wanting to have that piece of freedom again. And note have to be an “achievement”.

Her move to Colorado from Atlanta.  She really wanted it to be California….

I just kept waiting and people kept mentioning Colorado.  “But it’s cold!”  A wise person tells her perhaps people are a little more grounded in the mountains.  I got off the plane and knew it was right.  That sense of release of having a place is really phenomenal.   Deciding to stay is opening up that community.  And that I am where I am supposed to be.

Kyle Cease.   How did you end up at flow group?  Comedy is what helps me get through.  And he labeled himself as a transformational comedian.  So…. Jaunting off to “EOL” In CA followed the breadcrumbs. Flow group, I had money to play with…  Perhaps anti climactic for you.  “Yes”.

No current relationship.  Single and ready to flamingo 🦩:).  

I’m open to whoever wants to waltz into my life and be the right person long term.

EMDR - to work on trauma around loss from her mom.

In a 9 month training with Resmaa Menakem who wrote “My Grandmother's Hands: Radicalized Trauma and the Pathway to Mending Our Hearts and BodiesI”

f now is the time… what do I want to do with that?

I started doing some of the “The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up”  

To help sleep “The Power of When: Discover Your Chronotype”.  Different sleep chrono types.  

I’ve got to get my house in order.

There is no wrong way to do it.  There is no wrong way to be you in the world.

For all things Meg go to www.Meggibbs.com

…and a meditation to take us home.

Thank you Meg the awesome :)

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I made my last child support payment this day…  As a divorced dad it took me a while to come to terms with, “OMG I’m divorced dad guy, and I’m making child support and alimony payments?”  I also discuss some of the awesome summit interviews that I have had for the “Tools For A Good Life Summit”…  I’m definitely pleasantly surprised!

Episode notes:

Tools For A Good Life Summit - Register here https://toolsforagoodlifesummit.com/

I made my last child support payment today…  It’s a big deal.  It’s sussing out interesting emotions in me.  I got separated tail end of 2010…  10.5 yrs ago.  That’s a lot of years of child support payments.

As a divorced dad it took me a while to come to terms with, OMG I’m divorced dad guy, and I’m making child support and alimony payments.  It was such a disassociated moment because I had worked so hard to build a family and everything…  It was like, “What the F just happened?”  Somehow I’m divorced dad guy.

On the one hand I was like “I can’t wait until this is over and those are done.”  But I had the very distinct awareness that  “You’re just going to be a lot older”.  So better enjoy making the payments because when they end you are just going to be a lot older.  And guess what “I’m just a lot older”.  

It’s such a marker of time.  Both my boys are done with high school…  And heading into their 20’s.  One’s already 20.  It’s a trippy thing man. Life is a trippy thing.

As mentioned already, I got 35 yrs sober.  “I am not the clean and sober rep.”  I just happened to be a dude who is clean and sober.  And got to do a good 2/3’s of his life, so far, as that.  It’s trippy.

I recorded two interviews for the summit and they were awesome!  They were really good.  Some people are dropping some nuggets of goodness and it’s a lot of fun.

Dom The Hypnotist - https://www.domthehypnotist.com/ I was so pleasantly surprised man.  He crushed it!  OMG he was good.  Just the positivity and the awareness…  I knew when I found him, This is a down to earth legit dude man, who knows about hypnotherapy, it would be amazing if I got him on.  And sure enough I did.  You have his interviews to look forward to…

The other was Sheryne Willson - https://www.innermindperformance.com/ Gosh she’s beautiful, a beautiful women just A shining light, and vulnerable.  And willing to go for it.  I was totally crushing on her.  I could be in love lol.  So pleasantly surprised she had so many nuggets and bombs.  

I was so pleasantly surprised with both of them.  Craig Weiner is tomorrow…

Sheryne asked me a couple of great questions and caught me off guard.

It’s coming together (the summit), I don’t know how.  

Tools For A Good Life Summit - Register here https://toolsforagoodlifesummit.com/

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I’m very reflective as I recorded this episode.  It is the 35th yr anniversary of me getting clean and sober.  I tell you a little about some funny moments around that week of time; as well as it is hitting me very hard how my parents effectively helped save me from a lifetime of misery.

Episode notes:

It still freaks me out that Zoom tells me “I’m Recording”.

I’m somber, yet excited, and exhausted, and hopeful, and all these emotions going through me…

May 27th, 35 years ago today, was the day I got clean and sober.  I was 17 years and 9 months old.  For some reason I’m feeling it today.  That’s like 35 years, 3 and 1/2 decades, that is quite a thing.  Just with love, and amazement, and awareness, and awe.  I don’t mean that in an egotistical way…  I am at awe at the workings of the universe.  I am grateful and humbled.

Some people said some really sweet things to me today.  To be able to take those thoughts in , those nice words in, in a group setting…  Some people were very nice and impassioned in what they were saying.  Just good things.  To feel that love.  And to see other people be really uncomfortable, as awesomeness was showered on me :).

I want you to know that 35 years ago, Judge Rank…  I had graduated to Judge Rank.  And when you graduated to Judge Rank you were in trouble.

My father was a lawyer in town, a lawyer of note, and he had worked a deal with judge Rank…

I have him the whole “I have a friend routine”.  He said I’ve already heard the story, don’t go to school, or they will arrest you.

So he worked the deal…  You can go to jail for 6 months or you can go to treatment.  And by the grace of god I new that sobriety was the path.  “Great you can go turn yourself in in jail”.

They let me go to the last day of high school and I walked out of school, got in a car, headed to the airport, and was on a plane to a treatment center. 

Both my mother and father, who both passed away sober.  Layed the foundation of recovery for me.  Mom had dad had planted the seed of recovery in me.  That initial spark took hold.  That’s quite a thing I think.  I’m very grateful for my parents, because they saved me a lifetime of misery.  Yes they did.

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