Gwynne is theoretically a powerful druid! Neil is clearly a date rapist and also a bard! Anyway, here's Wonderwall! This is Talisman of Valdegarde, which - I swear I am not making this up - is an official Dungeons and Dragons Choose Your Own Adventure-style romance novel!

Unsurprisingly there are no content warnings here except for the anxiety that Choose Your Own Adventure books evidently elicit in people besides just me!   Thanks to Meghan Ball, whose Tor.com article Roll for Romance: The Forgotten D&D Romance Novels of 1983 gets rediscovered by social media every six months or so and which inspired us to track a copy down via interlibrary loan.  These books are hella out of print and quite expensive, so if you'd like to check one out consult your local library!