Today's topic is spicy. With Laura, our guest on the Pod, we discuss the need & dangers of talking about sex and dating at youth group. We talk modesty, short-sightedness and the sexualisation of women's bodies.
Here are some resources to help you along:
Why Does He Do That by Lundy Bancroft.
Written to people who are confused about their partner's abusive behaviour, or who are wondering if they are being abused. Bancroft has spent a lot of his career working with perpetrators of abuse in mandated counseling settings, and this book is designed to help victims see that their abusers, despite claiming to lose control, are actually fully in control of and responsible for their actions, as a first step to helping them get free from their abusers. IMO it's a must-read for any ministry leader to help them recognise signs of coercive control and get an inside perspective on abuse dynamics.
The Great Sex Rescue by Sheila Wray Gregoire et. al.
Based on data collected from a worldwide survey of over 20,000 women, this book is another must read. It exposes the harm of Purity Culture beliefs within evangelicalism, using peer-reviewed and published data. A very high-quality resource. As a companion to the book, Sheila and her co-authors have also published a rubric to help in evaluating other resources for healthy views of sexuality and intimacy.
She Deserves Better by Sheila Gregoire et al.
(Publisher's blurb) What if the goal of raising a Christian girl was about more than keeping her virginity intact? What if it was about raising a strong, independent young woman who knows who she is, uses her voice, and confidently steps into the life God has for her? This isn't your average parenting book: no pat answers or overly broad principles here. No cliché prescriptives or toxic teachings that your daughter will have to unpack and recover from as an adult, like so many of us have. Instead, you'll find data-driven insights about how to raise a woman who is resilient, knows her strength, and has the discernment skills needed to make good choices. By reframing (and sometimes replacing) common evangelical messages to teen girls, this book will equip you to raise a girl who can navigate the difficult waters of growing up while still clinging tight to the God who created her on purpose, for a purpose.