TAYLORDREW4U

Day seven, still alone in here. I got on a video call expecting an old Russian man and instead got one of the hottest neurologists I've ever seen, so naturally I did bits at him during a medical intake about Botox for my migraines. He half-smiled. That's the whole episode. Also covered: the time a piece of metal got stuck in my head, why girls with neurological problems should stay hopeful, the two-hour trek to Forest Hills, and posting a devastating Instagram story at night then being fine by morning. Last solo one before I start bringing people on.

This was supposed to be day five but the software I was building kept eating my files, so now it's day six, probably. Rough week. I'm sick of spiraling every time I'm dating a guy, I didn't sleep, I feel sick, and the only thing going right in my entire life is this dress. Also in here: the gaming mixer I bought off Amazon even though I can't play games, why I interrogate people like it's a bit when I actually just want to know why they do what they do, and a shout to Andrew, the one confirmed listener. Real episodes start soon now that I have all my equipment. Signing off. I'll see me tomorrow.

Skipped a few days because I was big sad. Still am, but less. Today I filmed a sketch called The Whipping Boy, which is not a porn thing, and then figured out on a walk with my friend Andrew that the thing I actually miss is the dog. I haven't cried yet, which is somehow worse. Also in this one: the 15 minutes of episode I lost because I built the recording software myself, a good set, a soldering iron I bought after taking apart two microphones just to see what was inside, my comedy show starting in a couple weeks, and a Gen Z asking me to teach them my eyeliner when this is my eyeliner. Day five. Two more and I really start.

Short and kind of a bummer one, fair warning. I've been missing someone I probably shouldn't, and feeling stupid about it, and then a friend who came over to console me tried to kiss me, which is the last thing I needed. I'm tired of kindness getting read as an opening. Somewhere in the middle of it I realized I might not miss him at all, I might just miss his dog. That's the part that almost got me. Also: it's Tuesday, not Monday, because I lost a day fighting with a microphone that refuses to work. Day five tomorrow. Maybe a better one.

Surprise bonus from the seven-day solo run — My Friend showed up, so now there are two of us. He is my best friend, walk-a-maniac, and designated toilet clogger. This one goes: the $350 electric bike that retails for $1,700, the kid who sold it to me and gave me a ten-dollar discount because I asked nicely, nude modeling for a tasteful high-end workshop where I didn't know the full brief, the Instagram commenter with two daughters who thought we were all joking, January 6th (storming something does sound kind of fun), my ex's stepdad who actually stormed the Capitol, a club host who decided mid-show I was gay, the eyeliner I've been doing since I was eight, He is teaching me to cook pasta bake, and Billy Joe Armstrong having the exact same hair as me right now. We leave at the end for a very prestigious open mic. I ride the e-bike. He walks.

I’m still trying to figure out video stuff, and what I tried today didn’t work. Bit of a downer this one.

Day two of seven. Recorded this on wired headphones because a bad adapter ate the version I did on the Yeti, and I breathed through it like an adult. Yesterday: a show at a weed place in Astoria where nobody smoked inside, which ruled, four hours of travel round trip, and muffins that turned into muffin-cake. Also the App Store rejecting BleepKit, my app that auto-censors bad words and adds captions, with basically one note: who is this for. Comics. It's funnier with beeps. Plus the headphone guy offering me a special deal, my dad's standing $200 Christmas arrangement, rearranging my living room to trick my brain into thinking I'm on vacation, and putting Red Bull in a beer cup so nobody asks why I don't drink. Stay golden, pony boys and girls.

First one back after about a year, because if nothing else I'm not a quitter. Riverside ate an hour of my life and $30 I didn't have, so this is recorded on Photo Booth like a cavewoman. Quick reintroduction: I'm a stand-up comedian in New York City, the show is me bringing on people who know something I don't so we learn it together, and I don't edit, not for artsy reasons but because listening to my own voice is not fun. This week I'm doing a short daily check-in every morning, morning meaning 1 PM. Tonight I have a show at a weed place, which is a problem because I'm straight edge and the last weed show hotboxed me mid-set. Also: thunder or a garbage truck, recording directly in front of my window, and being permanently banned from TikTok, which is a story for another time. See you tomorrow.

One of my best buds, Shaquille Shakur, talks and gets yelled at him mom a few times.

talkin' with Taylor