Cultural Myths (Part 5 of 5):

Is there really one perfect person for you or does God invite us into covenant love

Pastor Jake exposes the cultural myth of The One and shows how it quietly shapes dating, anxiety, and even Christian expectations. He unpacks two roots of the myth compatibility and the idea that attraction cannot change then contrasts both with a gospel vision of covenant commitment that grows real affection over time.

What you’ll hear

Why chemistry and shared interests are good but make a bad foundation

How scorecards and my perfect match thinking create fear and indecision

Covenant love over compatibility and why no two people are fully compatible

We are not compatible with Christ and yet He chose to love us

The second root myth that attraction is fixed and cannot be formed

How media and fantasy images distort desire and create panic

A hopeful path where lifelong covenant cultivates deeper attraction and joy

Try this this week

Retire the soulmate checklist Name one expectation to release.

Practice covenant habits Choose one small self giving action for your spouse.

Reform desire Fast from fantasy images and invest that time in shared delight.

Cultural Myths (Part 4 of 5):

Does a great marriage require perfect compatibility or something deeper

Pastor John tackles the compatibility myth and shows why covenant faithfulness outlasts personality tests and percentages. He walks through sin and change, a vivid sculptor image for spiritual formation, and why Jesus at the center is the only compatibility that ultimately holds couples together.

What you’ll hear

Why the compatibility story sounds convincing but collapses under real life

Sin and change make even perfect matches diverge

Covenant not fairness is the foundation that endures

Marriage as God’s chisel that shapes us into Christlikeness

Cruciform love and becoming the right person instead of just finding the right person

The only compatibility that finally matters Jesus at the center of both lives

Try this this week

1. Name the foundation: Ask each other What are we trusting more right now compatibility or covenant
2. Practice the chisel: Choose one small act of self-giving that pushes against scorekeeping
3. Center on Jesus Pray together for formation and unity before your next hard conversation

Cultural Myths (Part 3 of 5):

Is marriage really 50 50 or are we turning a covenant into a competition

Pastor Warren names the 50 50 myth, shows how scorekeeping erodes unity, and contrasts it with the gospel pattern of giving yourself fully. He grounds the shift in Scripture Joshua’s encounter with the commander of the Lord’s army and God’s unilateral covenant with Abraham and then lands it with a practical question for your home right now.

What you’ll hear

Why the 50 50 idea feels fair but backfires as scorekeeping

Covenant as the foundation of marriage not fairness

Gospel reframing God did not meet us halfway He gave himself fully

Scripture anchors Joshua 5 and Abraham’s covenant as pictures of God’s faithfulness

A real life example seasons of family life and asking what our team needs now

The better question Are we giving ourselves fully to God’s mission for our family

Try this this week

1. Retire the scoreboard Replace any tally with one concrete act of service.
2. Name the season Together answer What does our team need right now
3. Pray the posture Jesus help us give ourselves fully as you gave yourself for us.

Cultural Myths (Part 2 of 5):

Does sacrifice in marriage make you “lose yourself”? Carrie Vaughn tackles a powerful cultural script, “put yourself first or walk away,” and contrasts it with Christ’s call to mutual service and Spirit-formed identity. With empathy for real harm and nuance for everyday exhaustion, this talk reframes chores, disappointments, and daily fidelity as the very places God grows joy, patience, and covenant love.

What you’ll hear

Why influencer mantras (e.g., “this relationship isn’t serving me”) feel compelling and what they miss

Clear caveat: abuse needs intervention; this message addresses the everyday pull of hyper-individualism

From old self desires to new self formation (Ephesians): forgiveness, self-control, good works

Contempt, resentment, and “burn it all down” thinking vs. ordinary faithfulness

A better story: mutual sacrifice → mutual contentment finding your true self in Christlike love

Try this this weekName the script:

1. Write one message you’ve absorbed about marriage; compare it with Ephesians’ new-self vision.
2. Interrupt contempt: Replace a score-keeping thought with one concrete act of service.
3. Pray together: “Jesus, form us as we show up in the small things.”

Try this this weekName your story:

1. What narrative are you bringing into a current disagreement?
2. Switch the goal: Ask your spouse, “What am I not understanding yet?”
3. Pray your feelings: Bring them to God; ask for wisdom before the next talk

What do we actually do with the mixed messages we learned about intimacy? How does the gospel reshape it in marriage? 🎧 Episode Summary:Our pastors and their spouses get honest about purity-culture baggage, early exposure to explicit content, secrecy and shame, and why modeling everyday affection gives kids security. We also talk God’s purpose for intimacy (delight, covenantal oneness, fruitfulness) and the practicals: communication, prayer, patience, and serving one another. What you’ll hearThe stories we brought into marriage (church taboos vs. cultural scripts) and how they formed expectationsFirst exposures to explicit content—and why secrecy, shame, and “conquest” thinking linger into adulthoodHow modeling non-sexual affection at home builds safety for our kidsGod’s design: intimacy as a gift—for oneness, delight, and (sometimes) children—not an idol or mere utilityPracticals: honest communication, prayer (even in the moment), reframing from getting to serving your spouse, and wise wedding-night expectationsTry this this week1. Name your story: Share one message you absorbed about intimacy growing up—and how it still shows up.2. Model affection: A simple goodbye kiss/hug in front of the kids to build family security.3. Complete the Worksheet: Story of Sex and MarriageDon't miss: 🎙 Sex Talk Pt1 | "Sex. Covenant. Cultural Confusion."

🎧 Episode Summary:In this honest and challenging conversation, Pastors Ryan, Warren , and Jake dive deep into one of the most misunderstood aspects of modern relationships: sex and its role within marriage. Drawing from Scripture, cultural critique, and personal experience, the trio unpacks the competing narratives shaping how we think about sex, identity, and covenant.If you’ve ever wondered why the Bible ties sex so closely to marriage—or why so many people now separate the two—this episode brings clarity and compassion to the conversation.📌 Highlights:Why Sex Feels Disconnected from Marriage TodayThe influence of contraceptives, hookup culture, and “compatibility” mythsHow society moved from covenant to consent as the only sexual ethicPornography and loneliness as modern replacements for intimacyMyths About Desire and Attraction“You can’t help who you love” — Is that really true?Attraction is not fixed: it can grow with commitment and sacrificeCompatibility ≠ spiritual alignment — how to reframe what makes someone a good partnerWhat the Bible Really Says About SexSex as a gift from God, created for joy, unity, and covenant1 Corinthians 7 and the vision of sex as mutual service, not self-fulfillmentThe purpose of marriage as a reflection of Christ and the Church—radically different from cultural normsWhy Covenant MattersMarriage is not something you invent; it’s something you enterWithout commitment, even the most intimate experiences can become self-servingTrue freedom is found not in personal autonomy, but in sacrificial love💬 Who Should Listen:Engaged or married couplesAnyone struggling with today’s sexual ethicYoung adults exploring a biblical view of relationshipsPeople questioning purity culture but still longing for God’s design

Thank you for joining us for our first episode.