I had plans for a different monologue today, but my 3 AM creative brain had an idea it couldn’t drop. I woke up from a dream feeling ready to mourn the losses of the past three years. It’s not easy to admit, but I’ve been not so secretly punishing myself for how I responded to the pandemic. It was ugly, fraught with fear, trying to make sense of the internal and manage the external. I took care of those around me, but I stumbled deeper into debt, wrestled with depression, ate food to numb the pain, and gained weight. I knew what I was doing, and while my reactions were nothing short of vicious, I couldn’t stop. Fortunately, I heard a different story playing in my mind as I stared at the ceiling, wondering why I couldn’t fall back asleep.

Three ways to pay attention to your 3am creative brain:

1. When you wake up in the middle of the night, pay attention to the thoughts and ideas that bubble up.

Create an environment of silence, solitude, and space to explore your mind.

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• Chris Martin Writes on Substack