Ugh, it's a fuckin riddle. *sad eyes*

No fair. *super sad eyes*

Super no fair *Super duper sad eyes*

{Enter The Multiverse}

YO! LETS GO TO TUBBY'S!

YEEEAAAAAHHHHH!

ITS TUBBY TUESDAYS!!!

“TUBBY TUESDAYS?!”

“Tubby Tuesdays”

WELCOME TO TUBBY'S–I hope you're having a very Tubby day!

We are now!

Well, that's what I like to hear! Happy Tubby Tuesday everybody, right this way!

All the tables are booths!

…uh…okay.

Before:

What the fuck is Tubby Tuesdays?

Oh, Tubby's? It's a desert buffet and adult video game arcade with an all-you-can-drink bar on tuesdays.

Oh, well, that's…

–and the world's first BBW-Only Afterhours Strip Club.

Oh!

–after sundown.

Sundown?!

Fraid so.

TARTAR SAUCE! MORE TARTAR SAUCE!

Why on EARTH would you eat tartar sauce on a waffle!?

IT's a brioche waffle, okay–and the tartar sauce is candied bread pudding custard glaze-based.

Oh! Gross!

Its not gross! It goes dope on brioche waffles!

I've got to get out of here.

What!? It's not even sundown!

Oh my actual gosh. I have to find that envelope before things get even–

WHO'S READY FOR BRALESS HOT CHOCOLATE!

*gasps* BUT IT'S NOT EVEN SUNDOWN!

Check yo watch honey, because i do believe it's daylight savings time!

Oh why yes, I do have the sudden urge to “spring” forward!

I'm leaving!!

That's okay!

UGH!

Hey wait–

What.

.[beat}

Are you sure you don't want any hot chocolate?

UGHHHH!

It's braless!

Yeah, a/he was under my Christmas tree with flashing lights on and everything.

Man, you got Chris Kringled?!

What!

That's a thing!

How does everybody know that's a thing but me?

Was there presents?

Yeah there was— wait how'd you know.

Everybody knows about Chris Kringling, brother.

I didn't!

It's a web trend.

What! On where? I have all the

On WeMax!

What is WeMax?!

You don't know?

I don't.

A Bullet for my Valentine—

I love myself.

Man, I don't even know which mixtape that came out of.

Right!

Suddenly,

When digging through the bullet in my brain,

The finger in my skull

Reminded me the pain

I live with everyday

And I

Cannot put away

This is my

Suicidal thoughts

My creeping

Homicidal mind

But I don't want to off you all

I just want to end my time

On earth

So long

A GUNSHOT rings throughout the tightly clenched red brick walls of somewhere in New York; it seems to echo forever as if the city itself were empty and cold, ricocheting off the sky with a ring into the air— the sound making a journey into space.

Girl, you talk too much

So go and level up

Shut the fuhhhck up

Not just the front door

I'm not going on a shooting spree

The only one I want is me

The only one I shot is me

The only one I got is me

All of a sudden I feel really good,

But also really bad—

Like I'm high or something

Just on the verge of uncontrollably crying

And I know I'm definitely about to lose my shit

But I'm off a little, and also on a little

Like something just kicked in and I don't know what

I haven't taken anything—

Just fried potatoes in coconut oil,

And I've been eating differently

But getting through the stress with the comfort of simple products and the massive loads of work I've been sorting…

I don't know. I feel horrible, but also like I just woke up—like if I sleep I'll be dreaming some place I ain't awake really because I'm aching…

Achey at the thought of being up and left to ponder

What is really up with my mind

I'm longing—

Thinking swiftly but also sickly of how I'm decaying,

Same thing every day but it only gets a little longer;

And although time itself is getting shorter,

It still goes on, and I'm mourning everything I had to know,

But now just seems forgotten

Stolen Grace and getting awkward,

And really just on the wrong show,

A form of thoughts, impossible conglomerate

And really only waiting for my greying thunderclouds to roll in

Storms upon the wing of a swaying plane

As if it may just falter,

But all hope knows it really won't,

And we'll all land safely.

—Tom Hanks.

Sometimes my life doesn't make any sense:

Lil bitz

Remember when you were a kid,

And the mall was the greatest place you could think of going?

That was the day—

“Let's go to the mall!”

Then you grow up broke,

And I'm like

“Holy shit— “the mall”?

When was the last time I even went to “the mall”?

Fuck that noise.

The mall is where I'm not going.

The only thing that's going on in that place is

tAkiNG mY mOnEY.

Fuck that noise.

I ain't going to the mall.

I don't need anything from these places.

fuck the mall.

The mall as a broke adult is arguably the WORST place you can go.

“Ohh, what's in here”

“Don't matter—

Do you got money?”

“That's right.”

Fuck the mall:

Arguably the worst place, maybe.

{Enter The Multiverse}

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-Ū.