The Attentionist with Mitra Manesh

Episode 6 - Are you an Emotional Beggar?

Waiting for someone to apologize, to notice you, to finally change. What if all that waiting is a form of begging?

Most of us would never call ourselves beggars. Yet whenever we expect, demand, or wait for someone else to change so we can feel loved, respected, or at peace, we are begging. In this episode, Mitra Manesh and co-host Carlota Santamaria explore emotional begging: its different styles, the line between caring and dependency, and how to take back the power we hand to others. It begins with a simple question: what do I want to feel? And then: can I give it to myself?

Episode 6

A huge wave is coming at you, and you plant your feet to fight it. What if there's another way through?

When Mitra described the moment we finally say "enough is enough," co-host Carlota noticed something: she made suffering sound optional. It is, Mitra explains. Pain is what happens, in our own lives and in the world. Suffering is how we meet it: do we battle it, or dance with it? From there, the two turn to the Eternalist, the third and final state of the journey, and the three questions that guide it. Not a goal to reach, but a way to show up in the next five minutes.

Episode 5

Ten options in front of you, and you can't move. What if that isn't overwhelm at all?

At a recent workshop, a participant asked Mitra why having so many options can feel paralyzing. One line from her answer gave the whole room an "aha" moment: too often, we prefer the familiar unhealthy to the unfamiliar healthy. In this episode, Mitra and co-host Carlota go deeper. That frozen feeling isn't overwhelm, Mitra explains. It's the unfamiliar. And once you can name it, you can learn to choose: not the perfect answer, but your best in this moment.

Episode 4

We keep chasing stability — a life that stops changing, so we can finally feel safe. Mitra Manesh calls this the black chickpea: something we were sent to fetch as children that never actually existed. It's the story of everyone stuck in survival mode.

In this episode, Mitra and co-host Carlota Santamaria unpack the three questions an attentionist asks instead of the three questions a survivalist asks without realizing it:

— What am I truly seeing or experiencing right now?

— What are my other choices beyond what my frightened mind is offering me?

— If well-being is my goal, what choice could serve me best in this moment?

They talk about why choice-making itself is a source of pleasure, why self-care is the opposite of selfish, and why your body — not your mind — is the most honest place to check in when something feels off.

This conversation builds on the previous episode, where Mitra outlines the three survivalist questions (What is wrong? Am I safe? Do I fit in?) — worth a listen first if you haven't already.

Mitra Manesh is the author of The Attentionist: New Choices for a New World and the founder of Attentionism, a philosophy of conscious choice-making rooted in the Persian wisdom tradition.

Episode 3

Survivalists live in a prison they build themselves — and most never realize they're the one holding the key.

What is wrong? Am I safe? Do I belong? Mitra Manesh and Carlota Santamaria unpack these three questions — the ones that quietly run a life lived in fear, often without anyone noticing they're asking them.

Drawn from the book's framework, this episode traces how the questions get normalized into daily thinking, and offers a radical alternative: instead of searching for a better question, just stop asking.

New episodes every week — subscribe to follow the whole season, one page at a time.

Episode 2

Your attention is a sacred force — and it's already deciding whether you live in fear or in choice?

Co-host Carlota Santamaria sits down with Mitra Manesh to unpack attentionism: not a productivity method, but a practice for noticing where your attention actually goes — a few times a day — until fear stops quietly running the show. Together they explore what attentionism actually is, why survival-mode living keeps us stuck in fear, and simple daily moments where you can catch yourself and choose differently.

Season 3 - Episode 1

New name, new season, same Mitra: some of you knew this show as Lights On with Mitra Manesh. It's now The Attentionist Podcast, built entirely around the book, with co-host Carlota Santamaria.

Before you can choose your attention, you have to know where fear began. In this opening episode, Mitra Manesh tells the story that opens the book: the Big Everything, and all the little everythings it created — until one of them chose separation over unity, and fear entered the picture. It's a look at where we've come from, so we can see clearly where we're going, and how to get there smoothly. This episode sets up the one thing the whole season keeps returning to: the choice was never taken away.

New episodes every week — subscribe to follow the whole season, one page at a time.

My new Mindful Attentionist Self-Coaching Program👇🏼
https://www.mitramanesh.com/mac/personal

Rating & Reviewing our podcast helps us tremendously to  grow and expand our reach without  going the traditional route of spending a lot on Paid Marketing. This helps us keep our app price down, and allows us to continue producing free content and making mindful living more accessible than ever.

__________________________________________________

innermap’s Lights On with Mitra Manesh was born to shed light on the challenges and magic we call life. Innermap is a mindfulness platform with a newly launched app (IOS) that uses transformational stories, meditations, and binaural sounds to stir up change, growth, and stillness. Mitra is a mindfulness expert, storyteller, coach, executive trainer and UCLA teacher at the Semel Institute School of Neuroscience and Human Behavior with 35+ years of experience.  Who is Mitra Manesh? 

These sessions are taken live from Mitra’s keynote talks, classes, some studio recordings, as well as monthly guests, and a new format of Focused 1:1 Coaching. They are real questions, real answers, and real challenges people are facing. We hope you find value in the coaching and teachings offered. From today forward let’s move in the direction of lights on, facing what’s in front of us and more importantly inside of us.  

To contact innermap team with comments, questions, or suggestions, please email [email protected]. If this podcast works for you we ask that you please rate/review/share it.

If this episode moved something in you — share it with someone who needs it. And if you have a moment, a review on Apple Podcasts helps this conversation reach more people who are ready for it.

Hosted by Mitra Manesh — Senior mindfulness educator at UCLA Mindful, author, and Attentionist Advisor. 

The book — The Attentionist — is available on Amazon and Barnes & Noble

For more: www.mitramanesh.com

My new Mindful Attentionist Self-Coaching Program👇🏼
https://www.mitramanesh.com/mac/personal

Rating & Reviewing our podcast helps us tremendously to  grow and expand our reach without  going the traditional route of spending a lot on Paid Marketing. This helps us keep our app price down, and allows us to continue producing free content and making mindful living more accessible than ever.

__________________________________________________

innermap’s Lights On with Mitra Manesh was born to shed light on the challenges and magic we call life. Innermap is a mindfulness platform with a newly launched app (IOS) that uses transformational stories, meditations, and binaural sounds to stir up change, growth, and stillness. Mitra is a mindfulness expert, storyteller, coach, executive trainer and UCLA teacher at the Semel Institute School of Neuroscience and Human Behavior with 35+ years of experience.  Who is Mitra Manesh? 

These sessions are taken live from Mitra’s keynote talks, classes, some studio recordings, as well as monthly guests, and a new format of Focused 1:1 Coaching. They are real questions, real answers, and real challenges people are facing. We hope you find value in the coaching and teachings offered. From today forward let’s move in the direction of lights on, facing what’s in front of us and more importantly inside of us.  

To contact innermap team with comments, questions, or suggestions, please email [email protected]. If this podcast works for you we ask that you please rate/review/share it.

If this episode moved something in you — share it with someone who needs it. And if you have a moment, a review on Apple Podcasts helps this conversation reach more people who are ready for it.

Hosted by Mitra Manesh — Senior mindfulness educator at UCLA Mindful, author, and Attentionist Advisor. 

The book — The Attentionist — is available on Amazon and Barnes & Noble

For more: www.mitramanesh.com

My new Mindful Attentionist Self-Coaching Program👇🏼
https://www.mitramanesh.com/mac/personal

Rating & Reviewing our podcast helps us tremendously to  grow and expand our reach without  going the traditional route of spending a lot on Paid Marketing. This helps us keep our app price down, and allows us to continue producing free content and making mindful living more accessible than ever.

__________________________________________________

innermap’s Lights On with Mitra Manesh was born to shed light on the challenges and magic we call life. Innermap is a mindfulness platform with a newly launched app (IOS) that uses transformational stories, meditations, and binaural sounds to stir up change, growth, and stillness. Mitra is a mindfulness expert, storyteller, coach, executive trainer and UCLA teacher at the Semel Institute School of Neuroscience and Human Behavior with 35+ years of experience.  Who is Mitra Manesh? 

These sessions are taken live from Mitra’s keynote talks, classes, some studio recordings, as well as monthly guests, and a new format of Focused 1:1 Coaching. They are real questions, real answers, and real challenges people are facing. We hope you find value in the coaching and teachings offered. From today forward let’s move in the direction of lights on, facing what’s in front of us and more importantly inside of us.  

To contact innermap team with comments, questions, or suggestions, please email [email protected]. If this podcast works for you we ask that you please rate/review/share it.

If this episode moved something in you — share it with someone who needs it. And if you have a moment, a review on Apple Podcasts helps this conversation reach more people who are ready for it.

Hosted by Mitra Manesh — Senior mindfulness educator at UCLA Mindful, author, and Attentionist Advisor. 

The book — The Attentionist — is available on Amazon and Barnes & Noble

For more: www.mitramanesh.com