For parents of toddlers/preschoolers, the idea of giving up naps can be daunting. However, there are some tips and tricks that can make the process a little bit easier. In fact, many children transition to something that is commonly referred to as a quiet time for toddlers/preschoolers.

These periods of quiet time are particularly essential to those children who still have ‘nap days’. This often occurs when your child is transitioning out of afternoon naps, but may actually ask for, or show tired signs — which indicate they need a nap — a few days a week. It’s actually quite common for preschoolers to need afternoon sleep two or three days a week just to recuperate and be their happy selves. Quiet time is not only beneficial for kids it also gives parents a much-needed midday break. 

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The drive to sleep is biological, but the way we sleep is a learned habit.  All humans wake in the night.  Babies who were held, fed, or rocked to sleep at bedtime, will ask for this same help when they surface from sleep in the night.   To be an independent sleeper, go down without help, and sleep 11 + hours through the night, your child needs to be at least 4 months of age and have this important skill.

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The American Academy of Pediatrics suggests that your baby should not sleep with a blanket until 12 months of age.  This is part of the Safe Sleep campaign to prevent the incidents of SIDS, Sudden Infant Death Syndrome. This campaign also discourages the use of bumper pads in the crib and the use of pillows until age 2.

Even just using a blanket on the lower half of her body is not safe as she could kick the blanket onto her face.  The risks of having a blanket in the crib with a young baby are suffocation and strangulation. 

Is it safe for a baby to sleep with a blanket?

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Your baby needs self-soothing skills to sleep through the night. This is the ability to relax down so she can drift into sleep.  She’ll need these skills again when she surfaces from a sleep cycle in the night, as all humans do.

When you do “sleep training” aka "sleep teaching" you are removing your baby’s favorite sleep crutch so that she can develop self-soothing skills.

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Us Moms.... we've been keeping each other down by using the term  "sleep training."

We’re all desperate for easy sleep.  Consumed by the idea that getting your baby to sleep should be this easy, natural, instinctual thing.  I know because when I was going through this, I thought this too.  I didn’t think I’d have to work at getting my baby to sleep and I thought I could do it without any tears. I mean.. .he seemed to have a feeding and fall back asleep so easily those first few weeks… wouldn’t that just continue?  (Spoiler:  it doesn’t always)

The demand for easy sleep has developed a market of unsafe products.  Products such as the Fisher-Price Rock and Play which was never marketed for “sleep” but was recalled due to over 30 infant deaths or the Doc a Tot which is not approved for safe sleep according to the American Academy of Pediatrics guidelines.

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The first signs of teething arrive around 4 months when your baby will start drooling like Niagara Falls and be constantly shoving her hands in her mouth.

When I saw these signs, I was excited and proud that a tooth was coming! And then I waited and waited and waited….

My anticipation was a rookie mistake, as most kids will drool like that for about 2 months until the first tooth actually materializes, generally around 6 months.

There are large variations in tooth appearance related to your genetics, but most of us will overestimate the arrival of that first tooth, which will be the bottom middle teeth aka lower central incisors. I refer to this stage of teething as chronic teething, when we are waiting, seeing all that drool and have no rewards.

Acute teething occurs when the tooth is piercing through the gums. This is the most painful part of teething and usually, lasts 1-2 days. It’s a hard diagnosis to make since you can’t be 100% sure that the pain / poor sleeping is related to teething until the tooth pierces through the gum and you can see it, and by then the pain is receding.  It is a hindsight diagnosis.

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Is your child awake for the day at a time that most people would consider nighttime? If so, then the spring daylight saving time transition is the perfect time to get back on track. Troublingshooting early waking is one of the hardest problems to solve because the circadian rhythm resets to light exposure each morning and just a little light in the morning can cause your baby or toddler to ‘lock in’ to an early wake time. When we spring ahead 4:30 AM becomes 5:30 AM, so if you keep your child’s biological sleep schedule, then the clocks will do the hard work for you.

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While the Fall Back of the clocks in November has most parents running for the hills (especially if your child is already an early riser), the Spring Forward that occurs each March has most adults rejoicing. No 5:12 AM staring you in the face this time! Cue the parental high-fives!

Yes, the moving forward of the clocks by one hour is generally much easier on families with young children than the dreaded fallback. However, if the upcoming time change still has you a bit nervous about disruptions in your child’s sleep schedule, in this podcast I give you the strategies for managing the time change. 

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Sleep Timing and Quantity Chart 

Don’t lose sleep over Springing Forward! (The Blog with screen grabs)

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As I write this I wonder…. at what stage does the risk of sleep regression not exist? Ah yes! The teenage years when it can be hard to get them out of bed!

All kidding aside, there is a very prominent and REAL sleep regression for toddlers at 2 years of age.

This regression can occur anywhere from the 2nd birthday and on and off into the 2.5-year-old mark.

“The two-year-old sleep regression can manifest in challenges falling asleep at bedtime, night waking or early wake ups”.

Note that these are different from challenges that have always existed with falling asleep.

If your toddler needs to have a parent lie down with her to fall asleep at night, or get a bottle to go back to sleep in the middle of the night, and this has always been the case, this is not a sleep regression, but an existing sleep association issue.

The two-year-old sleep regression occurs in children who have previously been falling asleep by themselves in their room and sleeping 11-12 hours at night.

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No doubt you loved the moisture of their breath on your cheek, the weight of their arm on your body, and the hours you’ve spent baby gazing. But now you find yourself in the position where you are googling how to stop co-sleeping.

You’re not alone and it’s not uncommon that was working for you, just isn’t working for you anymore.  As one client said “It was working well for us, until it wasn’t,” and another client said, “I used to love it but now I feel like it’s getting worse and he’s holding me captive.”   Being held captive in the middle of the night is a terrible feeling especially if you’ve been doing everything for everyone else all day long already!   You need some time for yourself.

Every parent has their own journey when it comes to their little one’s sleep, behavior and health.  There is no one way to raise your baby.  But if you’re starting to feel like the broken nighttime sleep being kicked, or having to hold your arm in a certain position to suit your co-sleeping baby/toddler’s preference… let’s talk.

In particular, I work with many breastfeeding, co-sleeping children with parents who have the best of intentions to comfort and protect their little one, but who end up wondering how did they “let this happen” and get into this situation where they are nursing multiple times a night, or rocking multiple times a night to get their baby back to sleep.

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