We read and reflect on Matthew 17:22-27. I talk about doing things that I don’t have to do and what it means to be a reactor. I also wonder whether or not I am feeling my feelings and what it might take for me to face them.

We read and reflect on Matthew 17:14-21. I talk about my constant struggles with my oldest son and get a little angry he didn’t come with an instruction manual. I whine at Jesus for being annoyed at having to help me solve my problems.

We read and reflect on Luke 12:42-48. I talk about the privilege I have had and how much I have been given, and my willingness to give still more. I also talk about the inner critical parent and feeling controlled. I commit to meditating on what it means to be free.

We read and reflect on Matthew 14:13-21. I talk about the beauty and the plenty of the memorial site where George Floyd w murdered. I also talk about starting to see that in this world there is enough.

We read and reflect on Matthew 13:53-58. I talk about God’s other name and wonder who I have loved through a major change. I also talk about using my voice to amplify black voices, even if it doesn’t fit with the expectations of my hometown.

We read and reflect on Matthew 13:44-52. I talk about what it means to me that I’ve never had cause to cry out for the justice of God. I also talk about needing to be able to smell and to see what is rancid and rotten within myself.

We read and reflect on John 4:19-26. I talk about not having the inner authority sometimes even to claim what I know I am. I also talk about what we do and do not worship, and know, and see.

Reed and reflect on Matthew 9:18-26. I talk about being uncomfortable with a Jesus who loves the just and the unjust. I also talk about telling a story that isn’t my own, but a story that needs to be told.

We read and reflect on Matthew 9:9-17. I wonder about who it is that is sick in Minneapolis surrounding the murder of George Floyd. I commit to sitting for five minutes in silence.

We read and reflect on Matthew 9:1-8. I talk about faith and the faith of others and when right and wrong are just ideas we use to control others. I also start to wonder if feeling a connection to my higher power requires me to move through my own fear. And I don’t like it.