Depression doesn’t shout. It whispers. It convinces you that your pain is too much, that your presence is a problem, that the people you love would be better off without you.None of that is true.

In this episode, I talk about the most dangerous lie depression tells: “You’re a burden.” I share my own battles with that lie—from the night my dog saved my life to waking up in an ICU after a suicide attempt. I also break down what’s actually happening in the brain when depression takes over, why those thoughts feel real, and how to fight back with truth, faith, and practical tools.

This isn’t toxic positivity. It’s real talk about pain, neuroscience, hope, and why your story still matters.

In this episode:• The quiet way depression convinces you you’re a burden• The neuroscience behind why those thoughts feel so real• The role of shame in depression and why it isolates us• My story of surviving the lie—twice• Practical tools to ground yourself and reach out for help• A letter to anyone who feels like they’re “too much”

If you’re struggling, you are not alone.You matter more than the lie in your head.

If this episode helped you or someone you love, share it. Subscribe on Substack for my writing and follow The Bipolar Bro wherever you listen.

If you’re in crisis:Call or text 988 in the U.S. or reach out to your local emergency number. You matter. Please stay.

In 2012, my life looked unstoppable—double major, pre-med, powerlifter, driven. Then everything fell apart. What started as exhaustion spiraled into my first manic episode, a cross-country drive toward California, and my first stay in a psychiatric hospital.

In this episode, I share what it’s really like to be diagnosed with bipolar I disorder—the confusion, the fear, the trial-and-error with meds, and the slow rebuilding that followed. You’ll hear how faith, science, and sheer perseverance helped me find peace in my body and meaning in my suffering.

Whether you live with bipolar, love someone who does, or just want to understand it better, this story will show you that a diagnosis isn’t the end—it’s the beginning of a different kind of strength.

Topics covered:

* The slow onset of symptoms and early misdiagnosis

* The first manic episode and hospitalization

* What “bipolar I” actually means

* How lithium and lamotrigine changed everything

* The role of faith and family in recovery

* What no one tells you about living with a lifelong brain disease

If this episode helped you:Follow The Bipolar Bro wherever you listen.Share it with someone who needs hope.And read more at thebipolarbro.substack.com.

The language we use around bipolar disorder, suicide, and “mental illness” can either bury us in shame or pull us toward healing. In this episode, I share why phrases like “I’m bipolar” and “committed suicide” need to change—and how reframing our words can save lives.

Follow The Bipolar Bro, share the episode, and check out my writing on Substack.

In 2020, just weeks after a suicide attempt that put me in the ICU, I drove my first Uber ride at 4:45 a.m.—and picked up a suicidologist. What followed was a conversation that reframed suicide, reminded me of God’s mercy, and showed me survival isn’t random. If you’ve ever stood on the edge or love someone who has, this episode is for you.

This is a 15-minute guided non-sleep deep rest (NSDR) practice. If you’ve never heard that term before, think of it as structured relaxation — a modern take on ancient rest practices. Research shows NSDR can lower stress, restore energy, sharpen focus, and even improve sleep. It’s like giving your nervous system permission to reset.

In this session, I’ll guide you through:

* Physiological sighs — a double nasal inhale followed by a long exhale. This simple breathing tool quickly lowers your heart rate and signals safety to your nervous system.

* A body scan — moving awareness through your body to notice sensation and release hidden tension.

* Rotation of attention — focusing on the front, back, and sides of your body to quiet racing thoughts and anchor presence.

* Left–right awareness — resting in one side of the body at a time before bringing both together, which balances perception and deepens relaxation.

If you’re brand new to this, just get comfortable and follow along. The pauses are there for you. If you’ve practiced NSDR before, you’ll notice this one blends science-based techniques with simple cues that can take you deeper.

Use this whenever you need it — in the middle of a stressful day, after a workout, or as you’re winding down for sleep.

Whether you come to this as a beginner or a seasoned meditator, my prayer is that it gives you real rest — body, mind, and spirit. God bless you.

Suicide Prevention Month Special

I almost didn’t make it in 2020. I overdosed on 12,000 milligrams of caffeine, ended up in the ICU with kidney failure, and somehow walked out alive. This episode is the one I wish I had back then. It’s for my cousin, who died by suicide in 2020. It’s for anyone who’s ever stood at the edge. And it’s for you—because if you’re listening, you’re still here, and that matters.

In this episode:

* Why language matters (“died by suicide,” not “committed suicide”)

* What happens inside the suicidal brain (science + faith)

* Common triggers that load the gun

* The 6 R’s of Rescue (a practical loop to survive the moment)

* Tools: micro anchors, the Not Today box, sensory resets, NSDR, prayer

* What the church can do better

* What to say (and not say) if someone you love is suicidal

* How to build a real safety plan

Resources

* 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline: call or text 988 (U.S.)

* Crisis Text Line: text HELLO to 741741

* Veterans Crisis Line: call 988, then press 1

* Skills & planning: NowMattersNow.org, SafetyPlan.app, Stanford Crisis Self-Help Workbook

* Find help: Psychology Today, Open Path Collective, DBSA, NAMI

* Faith resources: Hope for Mental Health, FaithNet NAMI, Sanctuary Mental Health

Takeaway: Most people who survive an attempt never go on to die by suicide once they get the right support and tools. That gives me hope—and I want you to have it too.

Stay. You are not a burden. You are loved. You matter more than you know.

In this episode of The Bipolar Bro, I open up about one of the darkest seasons of my life—the suicide attempt that nearly killed me—and why I believe the Church can’t afford to stay silent about brain disease. Too often, Christians facing bipolar disorder, depression, or suicidal thoughts are told to “just pray more.” But prayer alone isn’t the whole answer.

I’ll walk through what suicidal people actually believe in those moments, why biology and brain chemistry matter as much as trauma and faith, and how Scripture shows us that lament is not weakness but worship. We’ll look at what the Church needs to do better, what to say (and not say) to someone in crisis, and why Jesus’ death was never meant to justify our own.

If you’ve ever felt like a burden—or if you want to better understand someone you love who lives with brain disease—this episode is for you.

September is National Suicide Prevention Month, and this episode kicks off a special series I’m calling Still Here—for anyone who’s wanted to leave but stayed.

This first episode is raw and personal.

I walk through each of my suicide attempts—from the bathtub, to the gun, to the caffeine overdose that nearly took me out—and share how I survived, what brought me back, and why I’m still here today.

If you’ve ever been in that place—or love someone who has—I hope this episode meets you where you are.

Not with judgment. Not with clichés.

But with honesty, hope, and maybe even healing.

Listen above, and if it speaks to you—share it with someone who needs it.

You’re still here. And that matters more than you know.

In this episode, I get real about what bipolar disorder actually is—and what it’s not. Too often people throw the word around without understanding it. This isn’t just about mood swings or being “dramatic.” Bipolar is a brain disease that changes how your mind regulates mood, energy, and thought patterns.

I walk through the different types (Bipolar I, II, Cyclothymia), the specifiers doctors use, why it’s often misdiagnosed, and what’s actually happening in the brain during mania and depression. I also share parts of my own story—how Prozac sent me into my first manic episode, how it felt to live through it, and why getting the right diagnosis matters so much.

If you’ve been diagnosed, this will help you put language to your experience. If you love someone with bipolar disorder, it will give you a better understanding of what they’re up against.

Bipolar disorder is real. It’s a disease. But it’s not a death sentence.

This is the very first episode of The Bipolar Bro Podcast. I share my story of surviving bipolar disorder, addiction, and suicide attempts, and why I believe I’m still here today. You’ll hear about faith, science, and raw honesty—without fake positivity or influencer garbage. This podcast is about what it really feels like to live with bipolar disorder and what helps me keep going.