[ENTER THE MULTIVERSE]

[The Blackness.]


Listen Later

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z_aLRVCa76U

The Wackness

  • The Blackness

    You can't escape it.

    The likes of the United States of America masterminded the false flag “terror attack” on its own citizens in 2001 in order to deceive it's citizens into a police state to suit the New World Order;

    Now, New York City preys upon its weakest and most vulnerable inhabitants via inhumane psychological terrorism, gangstalking, terror hacking, and other forms of psycholotical terrorism in order to maintain the inequivocal social and justice issues plaguing the united states of Asmerica; the globalization of a one-world government, and the continuation of the human slavetrae system from which the United states of america has built itself and has been thriving on, priding itself on being the strongest country in the world: However, it shall soon see its own de mise, with the importation of hundreds of thousands of non-natural citizens in an attempt to close the plummeting world economy, thereby once again prioritizing thousands of lives over the lives of the Indigenous and involuntarily Imported descendants of the AFRICAN BLACK american slaves

    YOU'RE BLAAAAA—-

    I get it. Shut up.

    BLACK.

    Please be quiet.

    BLAC

    shh .

    B

    please shut up.

    I'm allowed to have an extreme distaste for impoliteness

    Disgusting habits

    Lack of hygiene

    Honestly, I don't care what color you are

    Stop disturbing the peace

    NO JUSTICE NO–

    SHUT UP.

    Listen, I don't want to go through this again.

    I'm not going to kill myself

    Not today satan.

    I have too much to–

    Oh, really, I have nothing better to do than

    Make money?

    MAKE MONEY.

    Broke ass bitch.

    You realize, blacks

    mexicans

    Immagrants

    poor whites

    ugly /fat people

    that you're all still slaves.

    that the people telling you that “it's okay to not be ok”

    Are the exact people making everything not ok

    for profit.

    Oh, but also if your family owned slaves and property from slavery you should have to give a certain amount of your income to re-allocate some of the resources you–

    well , lets just face it

    STOLE

    YOU CAN'T DO THAT.

    WASH YOUR FUCKING PUSSY.

    (and also just

    *coughing*

    *toxcity*

    *grossness*

    getaway from me..

    *coughing*

    gross .

    *talking on the phone at 5 am*

    Mmmmmmmmmhmm

    SHUT

    Yo. Where are the indigenous people?

    Dead.

    or somewhere out there claiming to be 1/32.1/2th Cherokee and pretending not to listen to taylor swift.

    I MADE IT.

    I actually hate you.

    I knew it was a set up from the moment i walked in the door.

    There she sat, hunched over in the corner, almost hiding as if to try to surprise me.

    But I had already been psychologically tortured with the permanant record of my own past with enough audacity that I understood that I was being provoked and manipulated;

    And I was tired of it.

    They all coughed.

    They all wanted to have “random” “friendly conversations about my

    Pedophile Wifebeater ExHusband.

    God Help Him

    (No, Seriously, help him)

    Because— he tore my son away from me

    and e

    verybody in

    Very racist, very right wing, very color-coded, colonized

    Rural Alaska

    Assured that i

    (being a black woman)

    was the problem.

    –and you know what?

    Perhaps I was.

    WHAT HAPPENED TO FELEYSHA WILLIAMS.

    Idk. she's probably dead or tweaked out somewhere.

    I KNOW EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU.

    Ok. But you're ging to have to torture me consistently for at least a few weeks until we fight.

    He deserves custody. You're crazy.

    Cool. i don't want to spend the rest of my life arguing with someone who looks like someone who ruined my life trying to explain why it's salad until after puberty just to make sure his beauty doesn't ruin his life.

    Because all he eats is processed foods and plays video games and watches anime anyway so,

    Really it's a perfect world, for him.

    He's a perfect boy.

    I was told he didn't love me

    Didn't want me

    Didn't ask about me

    And didn't need me.

    So i left.

    Well, no–

    I tried to kill myself first (or did)

    Whatever

    Then I left.

    No, actually i tried to stay and split custody down the middle so nobody would have to pay child support.

    It wouldn't be fair to either of us, right, but:

    So here I am trying to explain how

    Yo, look.

    I left my shit in a locked parked car in a parking lot

    To push out a 5 minute shit

    And when I got back

    Everything was gone.

    hm.

    oh , you know what?

    No, the car was still there.

    The car was still there. Yeah.

    That's good.

    Yeah, I was real lucky for that,

    cause

    I lived in it.

    hm .

    Lucky for me.

    AH, shit. It was a rental, though, so I still owe someone a lot of money

    Interesting

    For getting ROBBED.

    So, here's the thing This:

    BEING A DISGUSTING, OBNOXIOUS, LOUD, COUGHING, DRINKING, SMOKING, PIECE OF

    Oh, that's what it is. It's my ex's energy.

    That.

    Doing the LEAST.

    Doesn't even know what clean IS

    so fucking fat he'll never see his penis EVER again

    and anybody else who does

    honestly

    it's cool,

    I just feel bad for her, honestly,

    like ?



    *gross pedophile wifebeater*

    You can't just go around calling people pedophiles!

    You can when everything they're obsessively sexually attracted to what looks like a kid

    or sometimes IS a kid without him realizing that

    Or

    is when they're openly watching porn and masturbating

    With a toddler.

    Yes. that actually happened.

    No, it didn't.

    I saw you.

    Well ,nobody will ever believe me, I guess because–

    Because the first time he hit me,
    I covered for him

    But only I begged him to stay with US

    THREE OF US

    a two year old, a one month old

    And me

    the wife that was so paralized from depression

    After learning that her husband

    The only man she ever truly “loved”

    had cheated

    The.

    entire .

    time

    So not only did I waste my time–

    My body is ruined, and

    I'MJUSTGOINGTOKILLMYSELF.

    –not the thing you want to hear as you're trying to stop the blood from pouring out of your face.

    My

    whatever . fuck this story.

    What why?

    Cause it SUCKS.

    PLUS

    I'm apparently

    “Very very bright”

    Hm

    And we're at the midsts of an

    Environmental Crisis

    *Multiple **Environmental*Crises

    Just at the tip

    Of another manipulated global disaster

    Which has left most the population

    Lazy and docile enough to not care

    About anything

    Anymore

    I care about my son.

    I don't care about your stuff;

    And I didn't take anything from you

    You gross, dirty, coughing ass, stinking pussy ass

    Grotesque

    Fuck it.

    I just

    don't

    care

    I have all my own shit.

    Honestly,

    I was just sick of beng reminded of this dumb sack of shit.

    It wasn't real.

    They were all actors

    gangstalkers

    undercovers

    CIA agents

    Welfare Office Workers

    What?

    Hey, look, just so you're aware

    Being in the system actually technically on paper strips you of some of your basic human rights and decencies.

    You are State Property.

    Bought and Sold for the benefit of

    The Highest bidder,

    Who,

    Never you mind,

    Is of the highest power

    In this predicament

    H O W E V E R

    I had finally been given an out;

    An apartment, far away from the

    Check it out,

    I was being studied, provoked, recorded, questioned about a past I was only trying to forget and gulted over and over as if i had abandoned my child on purpose

    No, son.

    Daddy just has issues

    And mommy has issues

    And I'm really really sorry about this

    But you're the most beautiful,

    Wonderful,

    Amazing

    Person I've ever met in my life,

    Bear(r)

    And I'm proud to be your

    FATHER.

    huh . what. I'm a girl.

    No. You're not; He's the girl.

    Bitch ass babymomma .

    Fuck it, just go be with ___ then.

    Oh, amazing I love this one.

    I never cheated

    I just retreated

    So I could repeat this:

    “he cheated! He cheated”

    “he beat me, he beat me”

    “I hate him, I hate him”

    My best friend was Annie

    My Lover was Davies

    –doesn't matter these days, though

    same place

    Salt Lake Saltair

    It's been years.

    You know how,

    When you're a kid,

    And you

    [Get scraped]

    Oh shit, I missed a –

    A lot.

    hm .

    You ever have another kid pick your scab off for you–

    Wayyyyy before it was ready?

    YOu ever like–

    You get it??

    Yo, i get this is like government, public housing or whatever

    IGNORANT BLACK WOMAN

    Why does she have to be “ignorant” can't she just be

    NO

    Because she was

    Extremely ignorant, this particular one,

    and so are most of the other ignorant black people who work in social services because white people

    a . wouldn't do it.

    b . aren't equipped

    Because the kind of black people you meet in a new york city homeless shelter are

    —no , i'm not actually THAT racist—

    just the

    lowest quality people

    [LCD]

    Lowest Common Denomonator

    She stole my ID.

    Fucku.

    So i'm a low quality people.

    Yep. You suck.

    Ok. I'm gonna go suck at Equinox for six hours.

    Go, then.

    Don't follow me.

    But

    We're watching you.

    Someone's always watching me.

    I'm famous,

    But not rich

    And every time i make any money my ex husband gets to buy drugs and ciggarettes with it.

    CHILD SUPPORT

    Before:

    Literally doesn't answer phone for months.

    Me: Thinking my child is dead because i can't get ahold of him, it's always winter in alaska and the roads are made of ice. Panic, fear, paralyzing depression

    And when I finally DO get in touch;

    It's because:

    ACTUAL BEST FRIEND

    I haen't heard from ***** at all but a little while ago some girl called me and was yelling at me accusing of cheating with him.

    ME

    AHAHAH

    ACTUAL BEST FRIEND

    AHAHAHA

    US

    LOL SKRILLE

    wait , this is a different story

    NO, it really fucking ISN'T.

    SO

    All my wages are garnshed to pay child support

    I can't even TALK to my kid

    and

    Oh yeah.

    I was only ever homeless in the first place because

    This is where it happened:

    BITCH

    *throws fake house plant*

    *RAGE*

    RURNJRNH

    *PUNCH to the FACE 1

    This cannot be happening

    *PUNCH TO THE FACE 2*

    Wow, that really sounds like in the mov–

    *PUNCH TO THE FACE 3*

    HE'S NOT STOPPING, I GOTTA

    *literally can't go anywhere, also being strangled*



    so somewhere between punches 3 and 5

    *FIVE PUNCHES TO THE FACE*

    And I mean, he was winding his arm back and everything

    Oh, it was weird how like my third roommate gave me almost the exact same injuries fighting over the thermostat.

    I'm cold.

    I'm hot

    Well, yeah, you're from Peru and I'm from

    LA

    Alaska, so

    I ean technically really neither of us are built for this but hey–

    America needs corporate slaves so,

    Welcome.

    Yo soy triste.

    Ay! Dios Mios. Ahora YO soy triste!

    *crying*

    Dios Mio

    Anyway, they know you're like some kind of like–

    Wizard, or like–

    Wizardry's alright–

    —Like a fairy–

    I'm way, way bigger than any “fairies” i've seen

    (and more powerful)

    Some kind of like a

    KEISHA THE ROADCOP

    Why's she a road cop?

    Idk. My brain backwards remembers her from that random McDonalds, though, when.

    WAY, WAY BEFORE THAT:

    (kinda)

    This hasn't happened in a really long time

    Staying up all night in ableton,

    Then only for the day to come

    To write and think about how

    I've been fasting again,

    but not on purpose

    I've just been so stressed

    Because all the bodies in my simulation are

    inhuman , coughing

    Keigha seemed human

    Kinda

    I loved her.

    I love her.

    I actually liked that one.

    By that time it was obvious that it was all an inside job;

    Each “roomate” i had been paired with had been given a specific list of buttons to push,

    Things to talk about

    Topics to discuss

    But mostly–

    Buttons to push.

    Look, if I commit suicide and anyone cares at all,

    there are thousands of recordings

    and writings

    Which indicate

    “she struggled greatly with mental illness'

    Or how about

    I suffer greatly from

    My 3rd grade teacher was a classic closet racist.

    I'm eight.

    She's a huge, unmarried mormon white lady

    And that's super unommon

    (Even for the fat ones)

    Fat people can have normal lives!!

    Not really. That's a lie.

    BODY POSITIVITY

    no , you should be ashamed.

    why .

    Because ive literally been tormented my

    ooh , also this

    I've been tortured, taunted, and humiliated my entire life,

    Made to feel lesser than,

    And shamed repeatedly for not only my weight,

    But my skin color– and that's a whole other thing.

    NO.

    Having a disability and being black are not the same thing.

    NO.

    It's not the same thing to “skinny shame” someone as it is to

    =====

    Look, you're looking for equality, right?

    NO.

    Why?

    Because ME is not equal to HER.

    Why not.

    I surfer more–

    –I work harder.

    Oh, look, by the way,

    I've finally figured it out that

    YOU LIVE IN THE JUNGLE

    WHAT'S A JUNGLE?!?!?!

    YOU'RE FAT.

    WHAT'S WHAT MEAN?!

    IT'S BAAAAD. But here, eat this:

    What is it:

    It's hamburger helper

    What's this gonna help?

    Nothin.

    THIRD GRADE TEACH

    She's a very bright girl, she jut has trouble focusing.

    BULLY

    *passing note*

    “Losser”

    SHE SPELLED ‘LOSER' WRONG.

    HOW AM I THE LOSER?

    SHE'S NOT EVEN SMART.

    *white passing, bilingual 8 year old*

    [Some spanish shit, honestly i don't know what she said because it blew my mind that she did not look, and yet was

    MEXICAN.

    FIrst season:

    Well, since even when I work full time and have two jobs I still can't afford an apartment, even if I DIDN'T have an eviction on my record,

    oh .

    Well, yeah;

    I got fired from my job

    I couldn't function.

    Like, at all

    I could still breastfeed, kind of

    *ouch*

    But that's it.

    I just couldn't…

    BENTLEY is a yorkshire terrier

    *teacup

    BENTLEY *is a Teacup Yorkshire Terrier

    What about this other thing?

    Which other thing?

    Oh,

    I mean, I'm not racist;

    I don't care what color you are

    Or where you come from

    But act decently

    -NOBODY wants to hear your phone conversations

    NOBODY wants to wake up to the sund of your voice every day

    (especially after the things you've said and done to them)

    And

    NOBODY

    Wants to pick up your trash.

    In fact,

    If that were my job,

    I'd have killed myself already bcause

    Well. This Fucking Sucks. I quit.

    YOU'RE THE DEVIL.
    YOU LEFT YOUR FAMILY TO TRY TO BE A ROCKSTAR.

    Actually, my family abandoned me and left me homeless when I started

    Eating an all-organic (at first, raw foods) whole foods diet.

    wtf.

    This is salad, no dressing.

    Yep.

    For like–

    Seriously my diet has been the most depressing thing about me ever since i've been maintaining my body.

    See. You can quit heroin.

    You don't NEED it to survive,

    Unless you're Scribbly Pibbles

    Aka

    You know what? It's not funny anymore

    Nevermind.

    When your friends go out for ice cream

    Ha

    Or Pizza

    Lol

    Lets Get McDonalds.

    OK, I guess i'll just starve, then.

    I guess we could insert the scene with Raven Symone here then?

    Which one?

    Idk.

    WHere is it.

    Idk.

    IT's buries. *buried

    [buries]

    Mm. Yummah.

    WE'll find it.

    I don't think we're gonna find it

    Maybe Sonny has it.

    Damn, fuck that

    Or maybe Dillon?

    [Dillon Francis is a very white man]

    No, but–

    I don't think it's safe to put any Disney or NBC shit in here cause it's like, you know

    YOu know what?

    [Censored]

    Hey, yeah

    I don't give a fuck about your shit

    Like at all

    But since you want a war

    And i've been brushing up on all my

    Office politics and

    strategies

    Then I guess since

    *ONE ATTACK ON MY SOUL*

    stop provoking me, satan

    Do you think he actually controls demons,

    or it's just the government is controlled by the white supremacists

    And you're being set up to fail

    A little of both,

    It's like a roller coaster

    Minus the plummet

    Explosions

    Co–

    Look, I actually can't write right now,

    I snapped.

    What do you mean

    I just snapped.

    I can't sleep

    I also just quit smoking weed. again

    Well, why'd you start

    Literally everyone around me for the last

    Who fucking knows how long but–

    Every single body around me starts

    *coughing*

    So maybe i must be the

    toxin

    This whole world just smells like poison

    Why are you trying to sterilize me.

    JOIN THE MILIT

    NO. No guns.

    What.

    PEACE.

    Beg your pardon.

    NO, NOW i'M BEGGING,

    ALL I REALLY WANT IS TO BE LEFT ALONE

    It's me again

    Get away from me you creepy ass nigga



    hey , it's me again

    stop being around.

    Out of sight, out of mind.

    You know, I was almost, almost

    dead

    Right

    So after being tortured by the US government about being SUPACREE

    Bruh, I'm telling you to quit provoking me.

    You're everything that's wrong with the world.

    Apparently, yeah

    so i tried to change that

    And by the time i do

    I'm obsolete

    TYLA, EVERYBODY!

    The me that everyone loved.

    The me that was perfect

    The me with

    Whatever she had to make her look like that

    (Water, btw. )

    No, we don't have water. You'll have to drink it out of the sink.

    What.

    *dirty, disgusting homeless shelter bathroom sink*

    yeah , drink that.

    IGNORANT BLACK WOMAN

    AND DON'T FORGET

    I'M BETTER THAN YOU

    CAUSE I'M NOT HOMELESS

    (Anymore)

    Because the homeless system in itself is like a

    big , bleeding, gaping wound of

    systemic racism

    Within itself

    WHY ARE WE GIVING NON-CITIZENS SO MUCH MONEY?!

    It goes back into OUR econ

    NO, iT DON'T.

    Half of it goes to

    INT. THE NIKE STORE. DAY.

    What up DJ!?

    I fucking quit.

    Trying to get a job as a DJ:


    WHERE'S YOUR FOLLOWING.

    They're not gonna follow me,

    Because I wear clothes in my photos

    And don't sell ass

    YOU DON'T SELL ASS

    no

    I'd consider it.

    Why?

    Cause little white girls make more than black girls in porn because we're so

    UGLY

    Ok, look, just because i called you “ugly”

    Only the fat ugly ones like me when i'm fat.

    Ugly doesn't negate lack of beauty

    Or skin tone,

    To me

    It's a vibe.

    Woah.

    Cool colors.

    Woah.

    What happened to Skrillex?

    He died, i think, er like

    Evolved, or something

    Another Grammy

    *instantly disappears into a dimension so high I could never even think to*

    It's lonely at the top.

    I'm not lonely, i'm sick of being punished for being born.

    You're not being punished! That's in your MIND!

    PATHOLOGICAL LIAR MOTHER/

    PEDOPHILE WIFE BEATER EX HUSBAND

    THATSALL IN YOUR MIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNDDDDD

    BEFORE:

    Torture–

    –Ridicule–

    -Trauma–

    Abuse

    NOBODY WANTS TO HEAR ABOUT YOUR PROBLEMS.

    YOu know why?

    CAuse they have the same problems.

    We're all the same person except for

    Skrillex, The US Government,

    A couple of aliens

    Whatever those to things are
    Those guys over these

    Wtf. I thought everything is everything.

    NO, it's needs to split.

    What do you mean

    EVERYTHING IS

    NOTHING

    Oh.

    There's Jimmy Fallon.

    FUCK! Now I gotta exp

    no , i don't.

    I'm just gonna make music

    which ,

    Doesn't really make me enough money

    But it's okay.

    I'm sick of working for corporations that only see dollar signs

    My employee number is my name

    My coworkers are all weird, and dumb

    and I work harder than everybody else

    But for some reason when I match the pace of my peers

    You have to go with the flow of traffic.

    NEW YORK CATTLE PEOPLE

    INSOMNIAC CATTLE PEOPLE

    YOU ARE WHAT YOU EAT.

    NOTHING ON YOUR PLATE HAS EVER SEEN SUNLIGHT.

    That's ok.

    I'm an omnivore

    No, it's not,

    Because

    The animal you're eating is a herbivore

    He

    or

    “it “

    You gotta castrate them

    but he

    NOT FOOD FOOD COW

    Mo..00oo?

    ..

    yeah , i don't know.

    Well, what about you

    SKELOCHICKEN

    *FLl**dies*

    hm.

    CHINA

    MORE HORMONES TO POI–

    I MEAN

    NUTRITION YOUR PEOPLE?

    AMERICA

    YES, PLEASE ADD MORE DEPRESSION.

    CHINA

    Ok.

    AMERICA

    THANKS

    CHINA

    Also we're infiltrating with the humanoid robot genetically modified satellite controlled robot people.

    AMERICA

    You can do that?

    STOP ASIAN HATE.

    *cough*

    *robotic*

    *nothin*

    I don't hate you guys,but this is weird and kinda shocking.

    Wtf are they doing with the asians

    STOP ASIAN –

    Nobody hates you, we just ant to know why

    *HOSTILITY*

    ok , this is weird.



    CHINA

    Hey, we've been on this continent awhile it's getting kind of crowded.

    AMERICA

    *hating all the colors but needing diversity to keep the corporate slaves from rioting*

    lol . they won't riot. they're all drunk or medicated

    IT'S OK TO NOT BE OK

    …really?

    Yeah.

    Wow. ok. I feel a lot

    That'll be $88.50

    *sighs* ….ok.

    *pays*

    …per pill.

    That's my whole–

    It's okay!

    It's not okay…

    Well, that's okay, because it's okay to not be okay

    *huffs*

    Ok

    IT'S OKAY! IT'S OK! INSURANCE!

    It's ONLY a $100 copay!

    What.

    EVERY 30 DAYS. $100

    Cause we need you to not be okay

    Why



    RICH ASSHOLE

    So i can be extremely ok.

    [beat[

    ….

    *sighs*

    *finds a penny*

    I'll take that too.

    *....*

    what ?

    I tried..

    Alright, I gotta tie this up.

    TIE THIS UP!? WHAT DO YOU MEAN?!

    I put all your shit in the trash.

    Tie me up.

    Okay, I like you

    But I lie good

    And i'm tired

    With my eyes on

    I got IONS on my filers

    I got no mail

    For the iron

    I'm so tired

    But man,

    I've learned that

    Sometimes, man

    Well,

    Just–

    Live hurts

    and if I swerve

    And i die first

    Cause this mind curse

    Is my worst hurt

    but ,

    no

    That's untrue

    I got no son

    I got no phone.

    Got no baby momma, but my

    Fire's lighting up an oven

    For my bun, or muffin

    I'm bluffin,

    I'm stuffed but

    God, I love these cumsluts.

    [( Jimmy Fallon cannot participate in this project. )]

    Well, why not?

    Honestly, hon,

    If i'm the mom in that one

    Stumble upon this podcast on

    stumble upon or tumblr,

    Then i'm numb,

    Bummed out for certain

    the songs and curses,

    verses make more sense than

    anything

    (and i mean anything and everything

    Inside this simulation since

    HILARY!

    NO, DONALD TRUMP.

    –but the conundrum comin up under

    A microscope such as this:

    My husband's a public figure

    And this girl keeps saying *nigger*

    Like the problems in the world aren't getting bigger

    –so this ring around my finger,

    Shall protect us from this singer,

    God help her–

    I hope my son never reads this…

    But Jim,

    The Executive Decision has been made!

    She's insane! Crazy!

    Abandoned her own baby for fame;

    adjacently;

    The Fame Game was made to be played by

    Players and families

    [The Wealthy and Super Elite]

    Oh, you're not ugly cause you're black, just–

    *splits*

    *scratches humungous crotchel*

    Uh…

    Yeah, Ok. No.

    So is this like a PSA on mental illness?

    Idk. did i survive this?

    Suicide.

    God, why do i

    Did I write this?

    I might have

    Something like it

    But i died again

    I've been inside my mind,

    I lied again

    I have no one to confide to cause

    Okay: So every one with blue eyes has given me this sort of pain, specifically

    * racism *

    &&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

    * deception

    *manipulation

    *dishonestly

    *mistrust



    I'm 8,

    My third grade teacher is just

    WAITING for me to fuck up

    Speak out of turn

    One time, she gave a soda to every person on my row

    Everyone but me

    Didn't explain it,

    nothing.

    Just

    “This row wins!”

    (Except for Cree)

    And didn't say shit; didn't explain anything, just.

    –and we're all 8,

    so

    lol nobody's saying shit in here but apparently that mental scar stayed buried until today,

    While i'm just sitting here trying to explain why,

    Something i've always found so pretty

    I don't hate white women.

    All of my best friends (almost)

    Have been white girls

    Which is how I know

    *she doesn't know what she wants*

    blue eyed people are aware that their eyes are a mutation/adaptation specifically meant to aide in survival by reflecting light.

    I … ok, go on.

    So it's not like, they're evil for it

    White supremacy getting ahead entirely, so much so that the reigning world power has lost touch with reality so much that it's 8 billion inhabitants are literally dying inside out of anxiety

    because we've built a dystopian society where it makes more sense to poison yourself repeatedly than to actually be a human and evolve

    –Evolution is a group effort.

    So yeah,

    S

    Fuck it

    The celebrities are up here in sodom and gamora or whatever and half of the politicians are in there with them, but the truth is that while the rest of us fight over something that's technically only been programmed to exist

    (there's enough food in the world, guys.)

    –MAYBE NOT ENOUGH WATER THOUGH.

    SUPACREE

    That's why you're trying to make me CRY?

    They're psychic tears!

    BUT WHERE DO THE TEARS COMEFROM.

    HEAVEN.

    Literally.

    Nowhere you can see or ever reach because

    DEMONS AREN'T REAL. YOU'RE CRAZY.

    Wtfever I was raised in the united states of america where GOD is implicated on all of our currency as if it's no curse of blasphemy within itself– blasphemy which WE made up just to control people because

    well , apparently all the people

    –all the people–

    the big ones, the little ones,

    The fat one e the short ones, the girls and the boys

    –are still going to keep making more peopl e

    Somethings will never change.

    Boys will be boys.

    My ex husband may not actually be satan himself;

    You know, cause satan can't stay in one place

    SATAN ISN'T REAL

    Ok.

    Are we seriously going to sit here and pretend like nobody has ever read a history book in their life

    YES

    EVIL EXISTS.

    IT ALWAYS HAS.

    It's not in your head!

    You're not okay!

    You were brought here,

    Amost entirely with the purpose

    Of servitude

    (most of us)

    Living beneath some of those who have

    never known

    The pain of poverty

    the grief of homelessness

    The cruelty of racism

    REVERSE RACISM IS REAL.

    OH REAALLY?????!!

    NIGGER.

    CRACKER.

    Which one do you want to eat?

    Neither, honestly, I'd just-

    Oh my God, he's up!

    Like a glass of

    Oh My God! My God! He's Alive!

    TYLA

    I got it!

    JIMMY FALLON

    Water.




    Wtf is Jimmy Fallon doing in a coma.

    IDK cause who the fuck just beat the shit out of JImmy Falon?

    I'm assuming it's not his

    Could actually be–

    Babymama.

    hm .



    …Unless it was.

    Into a coma?!

    “Why Women Kill”

    Oh, I get it. They're trying to see if i' P m violent.

    At this point

    ________LINES

    ____________________- BEING _______

    ___________CROSSSS

    ok , i fuked skrilex.

    I KNEW IT.

    I TOLD YOU.

    See, look this is not

    It's not

    Like, it doesn't have to be special or anything, i just–

    Need it.

    SKRILLEx/SONNY

    …I beg your pardon?

    SUPACREE

    Please, don't beg…

    SKRILLEX

    *face*

    SUPACREE

    I mean–

    SKRILLEX

    *squints*

    Unless you're into that, or something. I don't know!

    “I don't know”

    SKRILLEX

    So wait, you're a fan.

    [Apparently, or obviously, cause, I'm honestly getting this play by play, here, finishihg writing story in a stream of consciousness–]

    (or unconsciousness)

    Oh! That's MY coma! Nice!

    Damn. Wtf.

    [--like in real time–or, like,

    was, before I got distracted thinking about

    Shit, I got so much stuff I gotta do.

    [INSERT CELEBRITY APPEARANCE HERE]

    Well, perhaps this is one of them.

    Holy shit, I'm acid.

    What.

    How did that happen so fast it's only been like

    What?

    Well, how long's it been?

    I don't know, now well, where'd she go.

    It's Over.

    What?

    It's gone.

    Just let me go

    ok .

    Just let me go.

    ok .

    Just let me go.

    What if I just JUMP UP

    NO.

    Don't do that.

    The kit is stronger than you, Jimmathin.

    “Jimmathin”!”

    What, you wanted

    KING JAMES

    Fine, I'll write it.

    What.



    What is this.

    This is just like

    Woah

    [Art]

    Wow.

    Yeah.

    There's a lot.

    A R T

    JIMMY FALLON is a



    Are we going this?

    How else am i supposed to explain

    “ I L L U M I N A T I

    Look

    I'm you.

    ok .

    You're me.

    alright.

    [Young Gods] Wrking title

    Didn't they aready do this–

    Or something like this?

    Yes, but I wrote it first.

    TV

    Come and Get it!



    RAP WORLD

    UNH

    YOu'RE A LOSER

    UNH

    IMA NIGGA SO WHAT

    UHHHH

    Shut up, drake

    UNNNNHHH

    I'm gonna call you up

    UN

    That's enough

    OOOOHHHBIIIIRRRRRRRRRR

    That's it. You're done.

    WASTED.

    YOU DON'T WANNA BLACK BOY

    I GOT LOTS OF BLAC GIRLS

    WHITE GIRLS

    MOLLY, ROCK

    WHITE GIRL,

    WHITE GIRLS

    CHINESE EYES

    I LIKE HER

    THIGHS

    Sunni, shut up

    In UNISON

    Sep: I MADE IT!

    EARLIER:

    SEP, FROM UNISON

    Gimmie a dollar.

    ….okay, but I only have one dollar.

    Jimmy Fallon

    ILLUMINATI

    Please explain this.

    JAMES FALLON is a simple man.

    IS HIS NAME JAMES?!

    I don't know, but who names their kid

    JIMI

    Oh, no, that's like,

    Like you know,

    JImi Hendrix

    aww , i loved that baby…

    I love babies.

    I love her.

    aw . this is

    WRAP IT UP

    This is a lot of stories, okay, but mainly how somehow I got

    T R A U M A (D)

    Whait, where's Dillon Francis?!

    Who the fuck cares.

    Wake up.

    For waht.

    I gotta get waisted.

    You mean *wasted*

    Shut up.

    Wait so like, DIllon and CC are like

    Together?

    DJ*

    Oyeah. DJ. DJ the DJ

    [DJ the DJ]

    [BJ the DJ]

    ok , that was also, like, first season

    YOu're right, Justin, this is getting Meta.

    I'm not Hustin, I'm Rick.

    What.

    I'm Rick.

    No, no you're

    RICK SANCHEZ

    IT'S ME. i'M BACK. i”M THE REAL RICK SANCHEZ.



    well la-teee–

    UNITY

    You forgot about me, didnt you?

    UNITY!?

    That's why everyone is assimilated.

    Damn, you're really good a dissociating?

    Would you rather I not be?

    CUT BACK TO:

    Homeless shelter: The Reject Pile, The literally runoff of the

    World.

    Right.

    The broken, forgotten women that.

    Woah, her whole face was FUCKED UP.

    She went back to him

    NOOOOO

    (but like, that was me)

    Whatever. If you don't have kids, run!

    Fuck it, if you have kids, run

    just run at night and do it

    Quickly

    Just get out.

    Quietly

    Shhh.

    Wait, isn't it just as bad the other way around?

    What? Huh *still fucked up*

    You're high right now?

    No, i”m not high

    I mean

    I Am

    I mean, I wanna get FUCKED UP.

    What are you saying?

    What i'm saying is;

    I would get high on anything else but life right now

    why

    Cause i wanna die

    so die

    i can't

    why

    otta solve this

    what .



    Why i can't die.

    You WHAT?!

    I CAN'T DIE!

    US GOVT

    It's true! We tried like three times already.

    This can never lead back to us

    Did they give you a script!?

    Brings up random story from childhood even i forgot about.

    So you want me to drink water out of this

    *basically a toilet*

    Actually, the toilet might have been cleaner if she wasn't such a

    WHORE.

    What.

    She was a whore.

    I kind of figured.

    Why?

    By the way the toilet smelled when she used it

    *sniffs* ok. This is everybody.

    This is a lot of everybody.

    This is everybody,

    But then everybody left,

    Then more people came

    And everybody came back.

    This is everybody.

    This is too many

    *blacks*

    WHAT?!

    Look, like i said, it's not racism that diversity is getting more important than just hiring 7 white people and 1 or two of the rest of us for coloration and entertainment

    Cause even god knows

    Sadistic white supremacists love watching

    Everybody else kill each other over

    Things they already have.

    WHITE SUPRMACISTS

    Oh shit, it's the guys from Equinox.

    (it is, in fact, those guys)

    Wait. did i never finish my story about

    so what was the whole thing about

    BODY SHAMING IS WRONG.

    Bruh whatever the whole earth is a body and what “our”*coughs* species has done to it is pretty much the most shameful thing literally ever because we're mostly all racists kind of in one way or another or have judgements and intolerances – but

    *coughs*

    What?

    Why are we treating Anxiety as a mental illsness?

    Cause it's in your head?

    SYNETHESIA

    No, this shit it

    *Skrill

    Fuck it

    P H Y s I cAAlLLLLLLLLLL

    Whats wrong with him

    I don't kno w

    please eat, would you.

    lol . no.

    How long is this fast

    [LOUD MOTORCYCLE/SATAN]

    *stomach blowing bubbles of acid before its even audible in my ears*

    ow .

    *coughs*

    ok , ow.

    *coughing*

    Ok, ow.

    What if, that gross,

    Scary, evil coughing thing that's following me is just

    JIMMY FALLON.

    STOP FOLLOWING ME.

    YOU FOLLOWED ME HERE.

    PLEASE, OH GOD, OH MERCIFUL GOD IN HEAVEN.

    What? God's not in heaven right now!!!

    SHE'S NOT?! WELL, WHERE IS SHE?

    GONE.

    GONE WHERE , GOD CAN'T be GONE. GOD IS GOD.

    MARK

    LUKE

    JOhN

    PETER

    ….ok, this is getting strange.

    KING JAMES

    Finally, Jesus.

    Well, when does Jesus get here, then.

    Later.

    LATER:

    Can I go now?

    No

    What did you say was the

    Do you even read what you post sometimes?

    No, I mostly just write it then forget it exists

    What, really?

    Yes. So by the time you're reading this.

    It may have been years.

    Oh shit, this show's still on.

    Yeah.

    That's fucking nuts.

    Yeah.

    This shit gets craaaaazzy.

    my fans

    Yo dude, I had one roommate that might have been

    whatever, you had to have heard my podcast if you know anything about

    [PASSWORD]

    You want me to kill myself?

    *indifference*

    WHAT DO YOU WANT

    …..

    ……

    Why?

    Why WHAT?

    Why are YOU not fuckked up on that couch somewhere, or like, dead?!

    Technically, I am!

    What?

    This is a homeless shelter!

    Yes, obviously, however:

    Go on.

    Everyone here is sad.

    Correct.

    Everyone here is broken.

    Yes.

    Everyone here has been hurt–

    probably

    Beaten–

    Yes,

    Some of us

    Reviled.

    YO.

    Thisfuckedup.

    I gotta get out of here.

    Damn, so like, you pay child support and everything–

    But you don't even get to see your kid?

    And when you do it's on his terms,

    Because of nepotism

    And the assumption that

    as the bi-racial half of a bi-racial relationship,

    It must have been you that fucked up

    So much so

    That you deserve that

    And no matter what you do is wrong

    How was I wrong?!

    Your pussy stinks.

    That's it?

    Yep.

    You have mental problems.

    But my pussy clean. *shrugs*

    Anyway.





    Maybe I should be meditating

    I am META - TATING.

    Duh.



    INDIGEIDIOTS

    AHAHAHA . GOOD ONE.

    SHAQ

    AHAH

    Not right ow dude.

    SHAQ

    Why not me?!

    Because, dude, we have like one scene together, and i'm terrified of you.

    SHAQ

    I am picking you up now.

    no , no, shaquille o'neal

    yes , actually–

    wait , what's your name again

    S U P A C R E E

    n..o…

    YES. THERE SHE IS

    WHERE IS SKRILEX

    SHAQ

    UP.

    Why does he sound so dumb?

    Cause he's BIG.

    So that means he' dumb?

    NO, but I also can't afford another celebrity appearance unless,

    Pasqualle



    PASQUALE ON THE BEACH

    Why is it–

    BECAUSE

    [PASQUALE ROTELLA is on the beach.]

    PASQUALE

    No.

    AWW, COME ON.

    PASQUALLE

    NO, SUPA U

    Who is that? !



    PASQUALE

    SHUT UP.

    Woah, okay, ouch.

    PASQUALE

    You just said ***** 147 times.

    NO.

    but

    NO. U.

    What

    BE

    U.

    (lmfao why does he have that like mirror thing white people in the

    When is this

    Forever

    Lmfao you're trying to fry yourself a sunburn tan with a giant mirror.

    BLUE EYED MOTHERFUCKER

    No, i'm *** staring in mirror intently***

    Wow, your eyes are really pretty

    MEANWHILE

    [DILLON FRANCIS is about to DIE.]

    oh, you again.

    ohFUCK.

    [But his eys are really pretty]

    *glamour*

    Damn.

    Wow.

    She has a baby!

    wait , WHAT.

    CUT TO:

    Wait, Dillon Francis is having a baby?!

    YES.

    WHEN?!

    [NOW)

    WHENEVER.

    DAMN.

    [BEAT]

    WIBEATER

    You rang?

    NO.

    Hahahahaha42055555555555fucku.

    Whatthefuckishappeningritenow.

    I GOTTA GO.

    JUST BEAT IT, MICHAEL JACKSON.

    The silhouette of SUPACREE bedazzles as she dances

    C'ESME'T

    KATEY SAGAL

    Are we back to me yet?

    In a minute.

    Broh you have all these rich people mad deep in their feelings.

    I guess.

    (I am their feelings)

    It would be great if they were mad deep in their pockets for [The Festival Project™]

    Why.

    Excuse me.

    Why would anybody do that,

    When for the last

    [However]

    15 Minutes

    RANDOM NON COINCIDENCE

    Your 15 minutes is up.

    That's impossible, because I'm living in a homeless shelter.

    Which is where you deserve to be.

    Huh.

    For being born.

    Excuse me?

    Everything you've ever done.

    *breath, walk talk*

    Is wrong

    (I Am.)



    HOLD ON JIMMY, DON'T LET GO

    I might let go.

    DON'T.

    Lol

    This kite just might be stronger than you, Jimmy Fallon.

    I hate this guy.

    What is he?! Japanese!

    (Ive often wondered, not worth knowing, though, cause what's about to happen is)

    T H E W I N D



    IIIIIII



    Please don't cry




    SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

    plase dont

    Nono

    Nnnnnnssssssnsnsnsnsnsnfnffn

    V.O.

    Poor Little Jimmy Fallon…

    W I N DS

    FFFFFFFUUUUUUUDNDNDFFFFFFFF

    I AM DEFINITELY STRONGER THAN THIS KITE.

    No. no, you are not

    Wouldn't it be it's “the wind” “the wind is stronger than me”

    No, Jimmy Fallon

    James

    Shut up–

    It's the KITE

    DIRECTOR

    That's the line! Got it?

    And if you break fourth wall,

    When we're live, or just– ever again,

    WHAT. could be jimmy fal0n sure.

    Namesake police talkin bout:

    If we can put ot AI Michael Jackson,

    God rest his soul, which reminds me,

    After this scene, put the one with

    [The Soul Kitchen]

    I'M A MAN!

    T H E W I N D

    AAAAAAAAAAA–

    *sniffles*

    oh , maybe not.

    hm.

    JIMMY FALLON

    *sigh of–

    T H E W I N D

    SSFFFLLAAAAAAAAAAACHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

    KITE: BLOOP.

    x_x

    DEATH.

    NO SHAQ! Put me down!

    SHAQ

    You can DOWN when the BASS is ALSO THERE.

    SUPACREE

    No, you don't mean–

    SHAQ

    We WILL drop the bass.

    SUPACREE

    Put me down! I'm a grown ass woman!

    SHAQ

    *purses*

    SUPACREE

    I am NOT a tiny person.

    SHAQ

    I know: I'm married to one.



    SUPACREE

    I know, i know. the entire world cringes about it, however, congratulations on your happy

    SHAQ

    DUBSTEP.

    SUPACREE

    NO, NO DUBSTEP

    SHAQ

    DUBSTEP.b

    SUPACREE

    OH, GOD, NO, PLEASE

    SHAQ

    Maybe a little rap

    SUPACREE

    NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

    Andy Sandbourg.

    Uh, ok, wait, whose

    THE LONELY ISLAND

    WHEN WILL THE BASS DROP?!

    (When will the bass drop?)

    –When will the bass drop



    OH. That's why that island is lonely.

    YES.

    DO. NOT.

    UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES

    Ok

    DROP THIS BASS.

    Ok.

    I”ll be right back.

    Ok.

    [beat]

    [another beat]

    [some tension]

    [space]

    [more tension]

    [The lights cut

    CUT TO:

    JANET JACKSON bursts through the panoramic window.

    You are not Dillon Francis

    FIGHT

    Wait, fight w–

    JANE JACKSON

    Alright you!

    HOW DO YOU KNOW MY NAME?

    lol ‘Jane Jackson?'

    You know, just in case she didn't want to commit, but you know

    Janet Jackson was one of the first ones to approach me to show interest about this project.

    IT'S ALL FACETIOUS LIES.

    (t's not tho, i'm bein 100% honest and truthful bout everything, so .)



    LIE

    what .

    LEARN HOW TO LIE.

    Excuse me?

    or , hey, listen:

    You can tell the truth, but at least be funny.

    This is funny.

    *homelessness*

    *niggers*

    STOP SAYING THAT.

    Isn't it weird how the word almost only offends white people now cause

    Cause we're all capitalists.

    Capitalists.

    People that believe in money.

    Oh.

    AS GOD.

    oh .

    YOu have none.

    oh .

    YOU are the devil

    ugh GROSS. You'RE BROKE.

    What.

    GET OUT.

    What

    We don't need you here. We need people to hit the workforce, buy things, and never complain unless it end in

    ME

    MAKING

    MONEY

    Ok, fine, so like I just was saying.

    JANET JACKSON

    WHERE'S MY BROTHER?!

    WHEVER HE IS! I DON'T KNOW!

    [I'm getting really tired so i'm not going to describe in full brutal detail how Janet Jackson is whooping–

    Who is this

    Is whooping this other character's ass right now.

    Wait, Whoopi.

    Fuck. You saw it.

    Yeah, You're Whoopi Goldberg!

    WhattheFUCK.

    But you're als Janet Jackson!

    I Am.

    WHY?!

    Look, I didn't know you were a channel, alright

    EARLIER:

    CUT SCENES FROM A VERY BRUTAL BATTLE

    SAY UNCLE

    NNNNOOO____YuuuurrrrJANETJACKSON

    SAY UNCLE

    Control, Janet Jackson

    Seriously?! You picked that song for this montage?!

    it's!

    SAYUNCLE

    UNCLESAMWANTS–U–TO WIN

    THIS FUCKING BATTLE—YAGH–

    JANET JACKSON

    SAY

    UNCLE

    JUNGLE

    OH SHIT.

    Hold up.

    Okay, real quick.

    Remember those people in the jungle that don't know their in a jungle

    DANE COOK

    WHATEVER, I'M NOT DONG THIS PROJECT.

    IT'S TOO LATE, YOU'RE IN.

    DANE COOK

    OK.

    But i'm gonna make you forget about it

    For like a really long time

    Ok

    Until you forget who I am at all.

    Alright.

    Many, many lifetimes.

    Go on.

    Until I find you again.

    And you WILL.

    And i WILL. AND WHEN I DO

    I AM NOT DOING THIS PROJECT

    I am SO not-famous I have almost been

    FORGOTTEN.

    Forgotten at

    FORGOTTEN AT ALL!

    And I will not

    AND YOU WILL NOT KNOW ME.

    ok .

    …ok.

    So.

    So….

    kite.

    kite.___________________________________________________FL|| IIII IIIII YYYYY AAA |||||||

    UNCLE– UNCLE–UNCLE

    JANET JACKSON

    NOW SING ABC by THE JACKSON 5!

    WHAT?!

    SING IT.

    UNCLE. UNCLE!!!

    I WANNA HEAR A SONG.

    Damn, Janet Jackson still got it.

    WHOOPI GOLDBERG

    What gave me away?

    Your left hook.

    Still got it.

    I know.

    Even in the wrong body, now look.

    If I'm not Michael Jackson

    Could never be

    Neither could you

    O0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

    lol she's not gonna do this movie.

    She might. she's friendly.

    besides.

    ABC…

    KEEP GOING, BUT BETTER

    EEEEASY AS 1-23…UNCLE!

    THERE'S NO UNCLE IN ABC!

    Do you think we're at a feature yet?

    Notquite

    Why, how oong's a feature?!

    Till it isn't.

    Right., so

    Look, obese americans

    I know its hard to face the facts–

    Or anything at all, because, you know

    “I'm going to start eating right–

    ….later”

    and nobody's judging you at all, actually because.

    That was me.

    (Is still me)

    When i'm eating

    food , which was my

    Adderall.

    What.

    You needed adderall. Youe entire life and never got it.

    Yeah I know.

    Because you're black.

    Maybe that's not why.

    What do you mean.

    Maybe that's not why. Maybe when

    Look, my mom wasn't going to take me to a doctor for focus issues,

    I would cry and cry when my dad would leave.

    It's probably for the best that I stay away,

    I'm a psycho now.

    I might killl you.

    I would like that because I just can't seem to.

    CAPITALIZE. CAPITALIZE OFF THIS PROJECT!

    HOW?

    SELL YOUR ASS.

    WHAT? No that's

    (Only Fans)

    What.

    Look, you can't just BE a DJ: You can, but you're gonna need like, 3 other jobs, and some hustles and shit, cause everybody else.

    How come.

    Because, dumbass , you're not Skrillex;

    Or whoever he sits with.

    [TINA FEY Is a whatever. ]

    What does this mean

    I don't know.

    By the way, nothing's making me “do this”

    It's called “automatic writing”, it's some kind of extraterrestrial psychic shit,

    I don't know.

    My pain unlocked all my colors, and well.

    KITE.

    ____________________________________________________________________KE$HA



    Now I'm God.



    Wait, How long's a feature?



    OOOOOOIOOOOOOOHHHHHHHH, WE'RE HALFWAY THERE.

    OOOOOOOHHHHHHHHH

    30 ROCKEFELLER PLAZA, MANHATTAN, NEW YORK CITY, NEW YORK.

    So dumb the state has the same name as the city

    I kno

    So dumb

    Bro could you imagine being like a comedian or like an actor during the like

    “The Good Old Days”

    I swear I'm about to stop

    Don't stop.

    SAY, IS THAT A

    wait , i think i feel a song coming on

    Oh yeah, i hear it…

    Something like

    Fuck

    How to tell an obstacle

    From a crossword,

    Or draw slung crosses on awkward

    Wax polished

    silver scratched ponds

    On the surface or

    Then it all starts picking up

    When i turn on my pic or sing,

    I turn to write and this

    Motorcycle wants to eat me from the inside out

    Cause the man who rides it

    Got nothing on to watch on his instagram stories

    No only fans models

    Just hot soft porn

    And he's so far from a microphone

    –but far at all

    Cause i started to talk, then

    The car alarms going off

    all i got a words, really

    The music is gone

    A couple albums coming,

    The old stuff I made on my long journey

    being homeless

    with no son

    Long sauna jaunts

    (and I mean)

    Sometimes from Sunday to Monday

    And monday would have come and then gone,

    Before I could come home

    Cause there wasn't one

    Only a sauna, at my job
    Well, one of them

    The other's across town and,

    I might just make it in time

    (i won't though)

    I spent my first check on a bike

    (my mom lives across town, but she don't even know i'm

    Homeless;

    Nevermind,

    She knows this,

    She's just

    Preoccupied with

    THE BLACKEST THING i'VE EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE.

    That's a person, not a thing.

    No, you made yourself a thing

    THEY. made you a thing. To THEM. but when they walk away–

    I'm a man.

    –The world's yours.

    You are not my kid.

    I get that.

    It's the prettiest day New York City has Ever seen

    Oh shit, this is fucking IT.

    This is theMOVIE.

    DILLON FRANCIS

    GOOD. CAUSE I'VE. HAD IT.

    ST. JIMMY

    Oh, shit.

    I better run.

    Wait, Greenday is in this?!

    Everybody's in this

    IAMBIC!!!!

    (it's a rock opera)

    Yeah God.

    Speaking of THE ROCK

    DWAYNE JOHNSON

    YOOOOOOOOO.

    Wtf.

    Whatthefuck.

    WHY YES, I AM A WHAT THE FCK.



    CUT TO BLACK:

    [The Festival Project ™]




    {Enter The Multiverse}



    [The Festival Project.™]



    COPYRIGHT © THE FESTIVAL PROJECT, INC. circa 2018- 2024 | ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. ©



    -Ū.



    “”

    AFTER DA CREDITZ



    LOL WHAT CREDITS,

    I'm streaming this

    EDITORS

    OH YOU WILL SEE THESE CREDITS.

    these are insanely creative credits.



    TINA FEY

    (But way less cute)

    What color is that,

    What is what

    Your hair now

    Is it like

    MELISSA MCCARTHY

    clover….

    “It's Honeydew Blondi

    What

    “Honeydew Blondike”

    *blonde-like, but

    Holly. Which one?!

    Honeydew Blondish.

    Well it's weird.

    You're fucking weird.

    Wait have you ever actually met Tina Fey

    *unruly, wild shit*

    Oh yeah, that bitch is crazy.

    LIZ!!!

    GET BACK HERE.

    Uh.

    HOLLY ROBINSON PETE

    No, officer Hanson

    Detective

    You were demoted.

    I wasn't demoted.

    You know what.

    I was SHOT,

    CAPTAIN HOFFS is being haunted by her best friend's from back in the day; they are ghosts. She is the last surviving

    CAST MEMBER

    Look, what character am I supposed to be.

    lol WHATEVER YOU WANT

    what would you call this?

    Your “sexy” passenger?

    No, Dexter…

    Or, is it

    MICHAEL C. HALL

    I don't know. I think that's for you to decide

    No, dude, the whole point of the festival project is sometimes—

    It doesn't

    Zzz

    Wait, what happened.

    skrillex left the chat.

    Hm. I wonder where he went.

    THE B- SIDE

    FINALLy, the BEYONCÉ PART

    HAVENT YOU BEEN PAYING ATTENTION?

    THE WHOLE THING IS

    “THE BEYONCÉ PART”

    Because

    GOD

    BEEEEEYYYYYYOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNCEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

    *Beyonce, being Skrillex*

    [expletive]

    Ohhhhhhhh, that's how she got the accent over theeeeeeeeeeeeee

    —————eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeé

    matter.

    ...more
    View all episodesView all episodes
    Download on the App Store

    [ENTER THE MULTIVERSE]By Insomniac