The Breanna Williams Podcast

Sensitive Content Warning:

God Said I Am Loved, But I Was Abused, Part 4 ft. Abbi

In the final part of this deeply vulnerable conversation, Abbi and I continue discussing the difficult reality of healing after childhood sexual abuse.

Surviving the abuse does not automatically remove its effects. Trauma can influence the way a survivor sees herself, responds to relationships, protects her body, establishes boundaries, receives love, and understands God. It can also leave behind questions that are not easily answered: Why did this happen? Where was God? Can I ever feel safe again? And how can I believe that I am loved after someone who was supposed to love me caused so much harm?

This conversation makes room for those questions without rushing survivors toward forgiveness, reconciliation, or a version of healing that ignores what happened. Healing is personal, complicated, and often requires grieving what was lost while learning how to live beyond the identity trauma attempted to create.

Abbi’s story reminds us that speaking about abuse is not weakness. Telling the truth can be an act of courage, and seeking support can be part of reclaiming the safety, voice, and freedom that abuse tried to take away.

What happened to you matters—but it is not the complete definition of who you are.

You are not dirty.

You are not damaged beyond repair.

You are not responsible for what someone chose to do to you.

And you are not disqualified from experiencing healthy love, peace, purpose, or a relationship with God.

The person who abused you does not get to write the ending of your story.

God says you are seen, worthy, valuable, and deeply loved.

Survivor Support:

You deserve to be heard. You deserve to be protected. You deserve compassionate support as you heal.

Sensitive Content Warning:

God Said I Am Loved, But I Was Abused, Part 3 ft. Abbi

In Part 3 of this vulnerable conversation, Abbi and I continue exploring what it means to heal after experiencing abuse from someone who was supposed to provide love, safety, and protection.

Abuse does not remain confined to the moment it happened. Its effects can follow a survivor into adulthood, shaping how they see themselves, relate to others, establish boundaries, receive love, and understand God. Healing often requires recognizing the ways trauma has influenced your identity—and learning that the beliefs created through pain are not always the truth.

This episode makes room for the complexity of the healing journey. Survivors may experience anger, grief, shame, confusion, fear, or even guilt over something that was never their fault. There is no perfect timeline for healing, and moving forward does not mean forgetting, excusing the abuse, or pretending that it did not cause harm.

Abbi’s courage reminds us that speaking honestly about what happened can be part of reclaiming the voice that abuse tried to silence. Her story is not only about what she survived, but also about the woman she is becoming beyond it.

You are not what happened to you.

You are not the shame someone tried to place on you.

You are not ruined, forgotten, or unworthy of healthy love.

God says you are loved—and healing can begin as you learn to believe that His truth is greater than the lies your trauma taught you.

Survivor Support:

You deserve to be heard, supported, and protected. Asking for help is not weakness. It can be the first step toward reclaiming your safety, your voice, and your life.

Sensitive Content Warning:

God Said I Am Loved, But I Was Abused, Part 2 ft. Abbi

In Part 2 of this deeply personal conversation, Abbi continues sharing her experience of surviving sexual abuse by her father and the lasting impact it had on the way she viewed herself, love, trust, relationships, and God.

We move beyond what happened and begin exploring what it means to live after abuse. Healing does not erase the past or pretend the pain never existed. It requires confronting the lies trauma can leave behind—lies about your value, your voice, your body, and whether you are worthy of being loved and protected.

This conversation creates space for the complicated emotions that can accompany healing, while reminding survivors that they are not responsible for the harm done to them. The shame belongs to the person who committed the abuse, not the person who survived it.

Abbi’s story is painful, but it is also a testimony of courage, survival, and the possibility of reclaiming an identity that abuse tried to steal.

What happened to you may be part of your story, but it does not get to determine who you are.

Your abuser does not have the final word.

God does.

And He says that you are seen, worthy, valuable, and deeply loved.

If you are a survivor of sexual abuse, you do not have to carry what happened to you alone. Consider reaching out to a trusted person, licensed mental health professional, survivor advocate, or organization that specializes in supporting survivors of sexual violence. And if someone is currently hurting you or you are in immediate danger, please seek help from emergency services or a trusted local resource.

You deserve to be heard. You deserve support. And asking for help does not make you weak.

If Abbi’s story reminds you of your own, I hope this conversation encourages you to take one step toward healing—whatever that step looks like for you today.

Sensitive Content Warning:

God Said I Am Loved, But I Was Abused ft. Abbi

God says that we are loved—but abuse can make that truth incredibly difficult to believe.

In this vulnerable episode, my friend Abbi shares her experience of being sexually abused by her father, the person who was supposed to love and protect her. We discuss how betrayal and abuse can affect a woman's identity, relationships, ability to trust, and understanding of love.

Abbi's story reminds us that what is often casually labeled as "daddy issues" can represent deep wounds, trauma, and experiences that deserve to be handled with compassion and care.

This conversation doesn't minimize the pain or offer simple answers. Instead, we create space to acknowledge what happened, talk honestly about its impact, and explore what healing can look like when the person who was supposed to make you feel safe was the person who hurt you.

What was done to you does not determine your value. Your abuser does not get to define who you are. Even when someone who should have loved you caused unimaginable harm, God's truth remains:

You are seen. You are valuable. And you are loved.

God Told Me I Am Loved, But I Hate Men

God told me that I was loved. But before I could fully believe that, I had to confront some of the beliefs I had developed about the people I expected to love me—especially men.

After experiencing disappointment, abandonment, heartbreak, and broken trust, I learned to protect myself. Somewhere along the way, hurt became anger, independence became armor, and I began believing that men simply couldn't be trusted.

But what happens when the beliefs that once helped you survive begin affecting the way you love, trust, and see the people around you?

In this episode, I unpack my complicated relationship with men and how my experiences shaped the stories I told myself about them—and about myself. I explore the difference between discernment and distrust, strength and self-protection, and what happens when unresolved hurt quietly becomes part of your identity.

Because God wasn't only teaching me that I was loved.

He was challenging me to examine whether I actually knew how to receive healthy love without expecting it to eventually hurt me.

Healing meant confronting something uncomfortable: I couldn't allow the men who hurt me to become the standard by which I judged every man who came after them.

God said I was loved.

But first, I had to confront the walls I built because I was afraid to believe it.

God Said I Am Loved, But I Got Daddy Issues

God told me I was loved. But believing Him was harder than I expected.

Because if my own father could leave me, how was I supposed to believe that God wouldn't? If the first man I ever loved broke my heart, how could I trust anyone else with it?

In this episode, I open up about my "daddy issues" and how my father's absence affected far more than my relationship with him. As a little girl, I didn't have the words to explain abandonment, so I created my own explanations. I learned to be strong. I learned not to depend on people. I learned to take care of myself and everyone around me. And without realizing it, those childhood survival lessons became adult beliefs about who I was and how love worked.

We also have an important and vulnerable conversation about the different ways father wounds can show up in a woman's life. My friend Abi joins me to courageously share her own story of surviving sexual abuse by her father and how that experience affected her life, relationships, and healing journey.

Our stories are different, but they reveal something important: father wounds are not one-size-fits-all, and neither are their effects.

This episode is about more than "daddy issues." It's about the stories we learned from the people who were supposed to love and protect us—and what happens when those stories conflict with what God says about us.

God said, "You are loved."

Now I had to learn how to believe Him.

Who Is This God That Is Speaking to Me?

I had spent years asking questions about God, exploring different beliefs, and trying to understand the spiritual experiences happening in my life. Eventually, the evidence led me back to Jesus.

But that created another question:

Who is this God that is speaking to me?

I realized that for much of my life, I had created an understanding of God based on my experiences, opinions, fears, and what made sense to me. I believed in God—but I didn't really know Him.

In this episode, I go back to the beginning to discover who Scripture says God is: Creator, personal, protective, pursuing, saving, and present. I explore the God who created humanity in His image, knows us intimately, came looking when humanity hid, pursued people throughout Scripture, and ultimately revealed Himself through Jesus Christ.

I also share one of the biggest missing pieces in my understanding of God: the Holy Spirit. The same God I had been asking to reveal Himself wasn't as distant as I once believed.

The plant. The stars. The crying baby. The questions. The moments when I knew something—or Someone—was speaking to me.

I was finally beginning to understand who had been speaking all along.

Before I could truly answer the question, "Who does God say I am?" I first had to answer:

"Who is the God saying it?"

Because if the Creator is going to tell me who I am, I need to know who He is.

The Evidence That Led Me to Jesus

For years, I believed in God—but believing in Jesus was different. I had questions, doubts, and honestly, some serious issues with Christianity. Simply telling me to read my Bible, go to church, or have faith wasn't enough to convince me. I needed evidence.

In this episode, I share the personal evidence that slowly changed the way I saw Jesus. From unexpected encounters with God to studying the way Jesus loved, accepted, challenged, and gave purpose to people, I began recognizing a pattern that was difficult for me to ignore.

The evidence wasn't someone else's testimony. It wasn't my mother's faith. It was personal to me and connected directly to what I had spent my life searching for: love, acceptance, and purpose.

Eventually, I had to confront a question I could no longer avoid: What if Jesus really was who He said He was?

This is the story of the evidence that finally helped me trust Him.

I Thought I Found the Answer, But It Wasn't God

I spent years searching for answers.

I wanted to understand the spiritual experiences I had been having since childhood, but more than that, I was searching for love, acceptance, and purpose.

Eventually, I found people who seemed to understand me. They didn't dismiss my questions or make me feel strange for the things I had experienced. Instead, they gave me explanations. They gave me community. And for a while, I thought I had finally found what I had been looking for.

But what initially felt like freedom and understanding slowly became something very different.

Fear entered the picture. Darkness followed. And the very thing I thought was giving me answers was no longer giving me peace.

In this episode, I share what happened when my search for identity and spirituality led me somewhere I never expected—and how I began to realize that just because something feels spiritual doesn't mean it's God.

I thought I had found the answer.

But God was about to show me that what I was really searching for was Him.

I Believed in God, But Not Jesus

I believed there was a God. I believed there was a Creator. But Jesus? That was a completely different story.

In this episode, I share the part of my faith journey where I began believing in God again while still rejecting Christianity and the idea that Jesus was the only way to Him. I believed there was truth in different religions, that love was what mattered most, and that everyone had to find the path that made sense for them.

So I searched.

I studied different religions, explored spirituality, and tried to understand the experiences I had been having since childhood. And underneath all of that searching, I was really looking for three things: love, acceptance, and purpose.

Eventually, I found people and spiritual practices that seemed to offer exactly what I had been searching for. For the first time, I felt like someone understood what I was experiencing. But what initially felt like answers eventually brought fear, darkness, and questions I couldn't ignore.

I believed in God—but I still didn't know who He was.

And I definitely wasn't ready to believe that the answer could be Jesus.