In the second episode of the series, Sarah Bentz digs deeper into the invisible nature of boundaries and how we often don't realize they are broken until our lives feel like a "hot mess." Sarah explains that just as a piece of land needs a surveyor to mark its limits, we need to identify the specific behaviors that signal when our buckets are overflowing with things that don't belong to us. This episode serves as a diagnostic guide to identifying the symptoms of poor boundaries. From sacrificing your own desires for others to the exhausting pursuit of perfection, Sarah provides a roadmap for listeners to begin cleaning out their buckets and reclaiming their personal space. What You Will Learn:

• [00:00] Welcome back: Continuing the journey toward a clean bucket.
• [01:05] The Surveyor Metaphor: Why we need external markers to see our internal limits.
• [01:40] Knowing yourself: Why you can't set a limit if you don't know who you are.
• [02:15] Sign #1: Prioritizing others' desires while discounting your own.
• [03:22] Sign #2: The "Outside the Bucket" trap—expecting others to read your mind and know your needs.
• [04:45] Sign #3: Minimizing success—why you must acknowledge your own hard work.
• [05:40] Sign #4: The weight of the burden—how overindulging, overspending, and overeating mask a messy bucket.
• [06:55] Sign #5: The "Polished Bucket"—the pressure to look perfect when you feel overwhelmed inside.
• [08:10] Homework: How to use the "Bucket Handout" to start your personal exploration.
• [09:30] The critical question: Where did this start and how did it get in your bucket?
• [10:45] A message of hope: It's never too late to turn the bucket over and start again.

Standout Quotes:

• "Until we actually see something, we don't know that it exists, and that's kind of what that bucket is."
• "How can you set a limit with anyone if you don't even know what your own desires are?"
• "We cover up that bucket because the bucket's a hot mess... and so we tend to overeat, overspend, and overindulge because we can't deal with the bucket."
• "We shine that bucket up nice... so that nobody recognizes and sees what's inside."
• "Every day you have to ask yourself: What belongs in my bucket? Does this belong to me or does it not?"

Resources Mentioned: The Bucket Handout: Download the exploration worksheet to identify what's in your bucket.

• Website: https://hopeandgrowthcenter.com/pages/not-in-my-bucket

Let's Connect: Sarah Bentz

• Email: [email protected]
• Not In My Bucket Podcast

Be sure to like and subscribe and share this episode with those who might be carrying a heavy bucket! Mixing, editing, and show notes provided by NEXT DAY PODCAST