The Cannon Cruisers

Hey Cannon Cruisers fans! This week, we’re diving into the infamous cult oddity Troll 2 (1990), directed by Claudio Fragasso. Despite the title, there are no trolls—just vegetarian goblins, a ghostly grandpa, and a kid trying to stop his family from becoming plant food in the town of Nilbog. Yes, it’s just “goblin” spelled backward.

We break down the awkward dialogue, head-scratching plot, and legendary moments that helped Troll 2 earn its “so bad it’s good” status. From “They’re eating her!” to pissing on hospitality, it’s a mess that somehow keeps you watching. Tune in as we talk about what makes this film unforgettable—for better or worse.

Hey Cannon Cruisers fans! This week, we’re plunging into Trancers II: The Return of Jack Deth (1991), directed by Charles Band. Picking up six years after the original, we find Jack Deth (Tim Thomerson) facing a time-twisting mess—killer Trancers, corrupt future cops, and yes, two wives from different timelines. It’s as delightfully messy as it sounds.

We talk familiar cast and new faces, the sequel’s action-packed beats, and its tangled plot that tries to balance time travel and humor. There’s charm, camp, and some genuinely entertaining sequences—but does Trancers II deliver a solid follow-up, or does it get lost in its own time loops? Tune in to find out!

Hey Cannon Cruisers fans! This week, we’re trudging through the murky waters of Gorgo (1961), a British kaiju film directed by Eugène Lourié. The story follows a young sea monster captured by treasure hunters and hauled to London for profit, only for its towering mother to come crashing through the city to get it back. Sound familiar? It should.

We break down the film’s clear nods to Godzilla, its flat characters, and the repetitive pacing that drags despite the short runtime. Still, we take a look at the practical effects, the surprisingly strong visuals for the time, and the solid restoration. So does Gorgo deserve a place in the kaiju lineup, or is it just a second-rate monster mash? Tune in and hear what we think.

Hey Cannon Cruisers fans! This week, we’re taking a wild ride through Razorback (1984), an Australian horror film directed by Russell Mulcahy. It opens with a giant wild boar crashing through a house and only gets weirder from there. The story follows a man out for answers after his fiancée, an American wildlife reporter, is killed by the beast, dragging him into a world of local madness and outback horror.

We talk about the film’s standout visuals, eerie sound design, and how it draws comparisons to Jaws while carving out its own identity. With a surreal tone and strong atmosphere, Razorback blends creature feature thrills with a grim take on isolation and nature. Tune in to hear our thoughts on where this one lands in the cult horror landscape.

Hey Cannon Cruisers fans! This week, we’re diving into the absurd world of Lieutenant Jangles (2018), an Australian send-up of 1980s cop movies that’s loud, crude, and completely over-the-top. Matt Dickey stars as the foul-mouthed Lieutenant Jangles, who blasts his way through crime, chaos, and more than a few groin shots in a film packed with low-budget mayhem and nonstop vulgarity.

We take a look at the film’s commitment to juvenile humour, its action-packed set pieces, and the odd charm that keeps it moving. With a constant stream of dick jokes and shameless nods to genre clichés, Lieutenant Jangles leans hard into parody. Tune in as we break down whether this one earns its cult status or just revels in the chaos.

Hey Cannon Cruisers fans! This week, we’re blasting through Turbo Kid (2015), a post-apocalyptic action-adventure directed by the trio known as RKSS. Set in the wastelands of 1997, the film follows a comic book-obsessed teen who takes on the identity of his favourite hero to survive brutal warlords, deadly traps, and buckets of gore, all while riding a BMX bike.

We dive into the film’s lo-fi charm, practical effects, and heavy 80s influence. With solid performances from Munro Chambers, Laurence Leboeuf, and Michael Ironside, Turbo Kid mixes over-the-top violence with unexpected heart. Tune in as we break down the retro style, wasteland chaos, and how this Canadian cult hit holds up.

Hey Cannon Cruisers fans! This week, we’re diving into Real Genius (1985), a sci-fi comedy directed by Martha Coolidge and starring a young Val Kilmer as Chris Knight—a laid-back genius caught up in a military-funded laser project. As he and his fellow students juggle college life and high-stakes science, they uncover a plot that forces them to fight back with brains and a bit of mischief.

We break down the film’s offbeat humour, memorable characters, and the way it blends teen comedy with Cold War paranoia. From popcorn-fuelled revenge to awkward dorm antics, Real Genius delivers a mix of 80s charm and sharp writing. Tune in as we revisit this cult favourite and see how it holds up today.

Hey Cannon Cruisers fans! This week, we’re taking a look at Batteries Not Included (1987), a sci-fi comedy-drama directed by Matthew Robbins and produced by Steven Spielberg. The film follows a group of elderly tenants trying to save their building from demolition—until a few tiny flying robots show up to help. It’s part urban drama, part whimsical fantasy, and very much a product of its time.

With performances from Hume Cronyn, Jessica Tandy, and Elizabeth Peña, we break down the film’s slow pacing, its mix of practical and early CGI effects, and the strange but heartfelt story at its core. Is it a cult gem or just a sentimental throwback? Tune in for our thoughts on where Batteries Not Included fits in the late ’80s film scene.

Hey Cannon Cruisers fans! This week, we’re diving into VFW (2019), a gritty action splatter film directed by Joe Begos. Set in a rundown veterans’ hall, the story follows a group of war vets forced to fight off a gang of violent drug addicts trying to recover stolen contraband. With Stephen Lang, William Sadler, and Martin Kove leading the charge, the film delivers blood, tension, and no shortage of broken bones.

We get into the film’s throwback style, its use of practical effects, and the strong ensemble cast that brings weight to the chaos. With its mix of horror and action, VFW feels like a late-night grindhouse flick made for fans of grimy genre films. Tune in as we break down what works, what hits too hard, and whether this one’s worth adding to your list.

Hey Cannon Cruisers fans! This week, we’re exploring Amanda and the Alien (1995), also known as Alien Love, a made-for-cable sci-fi comedy based on a short story by Robert Silverberg. J.D. and Randy take a look at this oddball story about a shape-shifting alien on the run and the young woman who decides to help it, with a cast that includes Nicole Eggert, Michael Dorn, and Stacey Keach.

We talk about the film’s predictable story, the strange character dynamics, and the low-budget effects that add a certain 90s charm. From Animorphs-style transformations to scenes that leave more questions than answers, Amanda and the Alien stands out as a curious relic of 90s TV filmmaking. Tune in for our full breakdown and see where we land on this one.