Romans 5:1-5

The easiest, yet the hardest way we can change our lives is by pivoting. To pivot we have to change the direction we are going in. This can be a drastic or minor change. It is finding opportunities where none existed before. New realities need new skills and habits that you haven't tapped into yet. It may mean that you have to let go of old habits to move in a new direction. Life is going to be full of challenges and adversity and we are going to get practical about how to build a growth mindset, get gritty, pivot and become resilient. 

 If you want to change your life, change your feelings. If you want to change your feelings, change your thoughts. If you want to change your thoughts, change the way you talk to yourself. 

Change your close circle because you become like the people you surround yourself with.

Change who you focus on [Jesus] not what you focus on [current situation]. 

What thoughts about yourself to you need to challenge? 

Reframe hard realities to find opportunities to learn and grow. It doesn't mean you have to diminish the impact of the hard reality you are going through, but by reframing it does give you the mindset to keep going.

View failure as a learning curve and not an ultimate ending. 

Change how much you believe in yourself. Remind yourself of your strengths and how you have worked through hard realities before. o Spend time with Jesus and make Him the centre of it all. 

What are you passionate about?  

What have you learnt about yourself in the last year? 

Tell your group about a time where things weren't going well but you kept going and saw yourself grow. 

Find yourself in community. United and unified. You don't have to carry a burden on your own. 

You are not a victim, but you are a survivor and victorious. Jesus overcame the world. 

Persevere because it builds you up. [Broken bone analogy]  

Be optimistic about the future because Jesus has the best in mind for you.  

Jeremiah 29:11‬‬  

What hard realities can your group help you face?  

What do you think of when you hear that Jesus has the best in mind for you? Give an example.

Question 1: What’s your favourite Disney Pixar movie? 

Disclaimer: We do not claim to be experts on this subject. We are speaking on our own journeys through this process. 

Ecclesiastes 3:4  https://www.bible.com/bible/116/ECC.3.4 

Stage 1: Denial · It is minimizing the pain we are feeling. · Trying to survive and finding coping mechanisms. · To deny your hard reality and pain will mean that you are denying your healing. · Acknowledge the hard reality you are going through Stage 2: Anger · Give motion to your emotions. · Give yourself permission to feel. · Practically: Go for a run Do meditation Get around people who will get around you · Exercise will give you: A physical release A space to work through what you are feeling Endorphins that are released into the brain (combats Cortisol) Question 2: What do you need to be honest with God or others about? Stage 3: Bargaining · The WHAT IF/IF ONLY stage. · If this happens then I will do this (negotiating with Jesus). · Justifying anything and everything. · Disconnected from reality. · Acknowledge your emotions and thoughts but don’t accept them as facts. – Dr. Caroline Leaf Stage 4: Depression · Moving from the past and facing what is presently happening. · Be kind to yourself · It is ok to ask for help. · Take breaks from your feelings. · Feelings are like kids in a car. Question 3: - Where do you need support? - How can you be kinder to yourself? - How can you speak differently to yourself in hard realities? Stage 5: Acceptance · Learning to live with the new reality. · Finding hope for the future to hold onto. · Moving forward over moving on from reality. · Mindfulness · Newness and restoration · Phil 4:12-13: https://www.bible.com/bible/1849/PHP.4.12-13 How to help? · Avoid rescuing or fixing people. Support them. · Be present. · Be empathetic, not sympathetic. · Don’t force help onto people. · Be available and accessible (if you have the capacity) Big Question · What is God’s heart for us through each stage?

Not ME but WE

First group Question. What is important about community?

Isaiah 55:9

What you focus on becomes bigger.

Second group Question. What are ways we can keep our focus on Jesus?

We don’t understand why things happen but Jesus is there through it all.

Third group question. What situation do you need peace in at the moment?

Let Jesus into your situation fully because He can turn every situation around.

In Him, there are gifts and opportunities in every day with Him.

Take time to rejoice and be in worship. 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

Fourth group question. What are gifts and opportunities we can find in our every day with Jesus?