Marsh, Chris and Tom F mull over this year's best April Fools, the future of Oculus, crazy controllers at GDC, randomised adventures in Reaper of Souls, and why Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes represents the PC-ification of console games.

In which Marsh, Graham and special guest Alex Wiltshire from Hello Games gather to discuss the two Tom's GDC-induced weakness, the remaining limitations of Oculus Rift's second development kit, why Graham continues to play driving sims for fun, and Marsh's thoughts on the axes and muskets of Betrayer.

In which we definitely don’t feel at all jealous of the two Toms. Instead, Chris brings his Dota-learnin’ to Heroes of the Storm, Marsh goes for round two, or 2.0, with Godus, and Graham keeps it wheel with chariot game Qvadriga and bus sim OMSI 2.

Graham, Tom Senior, Chris and special guest Philippa Warr discuss insect-infested planets, robot-infested moons, man-infested robots, and subway-infested men. Or Infested Planet, Planetary Annihilation, Titanfall and Mini Metro, if you prefer.

In which the we bestow upon your ears our last will and testament. Chris leaves his thoughts on Diablo 3's Loot 2.0 patch, Graham passes on his love of Towerfall: Ascension, Marsh leaves a treasure map to his feelings on Intruder, and Tom F decrees that you spend a night in the house haunted by living dolls, HOMEunculus.

In which the team gathers to offer the steal of the century: Tom F enjoys the cinematic violence of Tomb Raider, Marsh enjoys the cartwheeling violence of Strider, Graham enjoys the tactical violence of Intruder, and Chris becomes victim to the internet's violence over the new Thief.

In which Marsh, Tom F and Tom S are bundled into the chest-womb of an orbiting attack robot to discuss the mysteries of Titanfall, the hidden treasures of IndieCade East, and the dilemma of the unspent meat tornado in Kingdom of Loathing.

In which Marsh, Chris, Tom S and guest Rich Stanton convene to discuss matters of magic in Dominions 4 and The Elder Scrolls. Rich creatively dismantles home invaders in The Castle Doctrine and Marsh contemplates flappity-dappity dongs of Loadout.

In which we climb inside a straw man made of worms. The Wolf Among Us: Episode Two leaves Tom S huffing and puffing, Tom F brings new meaning to “sleeper agent” in espionage sim Covert Action and Chris gets twitchy in aerial shooter Strike Vector.

In which Chris, Marsh, and Tom Senior are joined by special guest Rich Stanton – The Crate and Crowbar’s second alumnus of Machanhill Primary School, Larkhall, South Lanarkshire. Discussed: the Rift in Westeros; Hearthstone etiquette; Dominions 4 and the many faces of god; filleting helicopters in Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance; fashion in Deus Ex: Human Revolution.

We also answer questions. It doesn’t take as long as last time.

Apologies for occasional weirdness in the audio. This episode was recorded in Marsh’s new house, and we’re still figuring out the setup.

* Explore Westeros using the Oculus Rift…

* …but try not to get decapitated.

* Hearthstone is in open beta now. Well Met!

* Dominions 4 looks like dick, but plays like hot dick.

* Deus Ex: Human Revolution – Director’s Cut is pretty good and everything but seriously let’s talk about Adam’s beard.

* Also we should probably talk about this man’s head.

* Seriously, what’s going on. It’s tiny.

* PC Gamer’s Thief preview, which touches on the importance of environmental storytelling.

* Claud’s pun-mining rig.

* Chivalry is a serious game.

* Man taunts children with Call of Duty gamertag. Also, some guys who are way baked.

* CJ tells us that this is something one might legitimately wear on one’s brain.

Once again, our intro music is from the track Clambake by The Mandibles. Many of the band members now tour as Count Bobo And The Bullion.