The Create Yourself Podcast

Welcome back to the Create Yourself podcast!

This week I'm talking about people pleasing, and the part of me that, for most of my life, didn't even realise saying no was an option.

I get into how growing up as the girl who wanted to fit in and be liked shaped basically every yes I've ever given. The jobs I was good at but didn't actually want. The relationships where I wanted to be wanted more than I wanted the other person. The family dynamics where saying no felt riskier than staying quiet and letting myself be walked over.

I talk honestly about what that costs over time -  the resentment you don't say out loud, the exhaustion of holding up a version of yourself that isn't really you, and the moment that quiet "something's not right" feeling gets louder than your fear of losing the relationship altogether.

I share what's actually helped me start doing it differently, and the way saying no has actually given me this huge shift in confidence and energy. I’ve had to accept that choosing me might make my circle get smaller - and that some relationships have to fall away in order for me to be in alignment with myself. And that’s hard - but it’s also ok.

This one might sting a bit if people pleasing is familiar territory for you, and honestly it stung a bit to record it, but it also felt really good to say it out loud. 

If you liked this episode and want to support the show, please like, share, and give it a 5 star review. Your support means everything to me!

Download The Create Yourself Free App: https://subscription.createyourself.co.nz/library

Find me on my socials:

Instagram: @createyourself.nz

TikTok: @itsrachthomas

YouTube: ItsRachThomas 

Learn more about working with me:

Website: https://www.createyourself.co.nz 

Email: [email protected]

Welcome back to the Create Yourself podcast!

This week I'm talking about alcohol. Not the "rock bottom, blackout drunk, ends up in rehab" story. That was never mine. And for years, that's exactly why it was so hard to admit alcohol was actually a problem for me at all.

I get honest about the real timeline. Quitting cold turkey the first time, right after my separation, when a couple of big glasses of red wine a night were the only thing numbing the pain of being away from my son. 

Then, a year later my 40th birthday rolled around. I told myself I'd "reset my relationship with alcohol," but one drink at a girls' weekend put me straight back in the cycle. 

I also get into why just "cutting back" was never going to work for me, and why building an actual identity as someone who's alcohol-free, not someone who's trying to be, is what's finally making it stick. 

As always, I lay it all out there, no filters or frills - and it's my hope that my story will help you if there's something you're feeling ready to let go of. 

If you liked this episode and want to support the show, please like, share, and give it a 5 star review. Your support means everything to me!

Download The Create Yourself Free App: https://subscription.createyourself.co.nz/library

Find me on my socials:

Instagram: @createyourself.nz

TikTok: @itsrachthomas

YouTube: ItsRachThomas 

Learn more about working with me:

Website: https://www.createyourself.co.nz 

Email: [email protected]

In this episode I get honest about dating in my 40s, and about the night I almost talked myself out of going to an over 40 singles night. I share how I nearly said no outright, and how I only agreed once I could frame it as "just being my friend's wing woman," so I didn't have to admit I was actually putting myself out there.

I dig into why dating apps have left so many of us exhausted, why almost everyone at that singles night said the exact same thing when I asked what brought them there, and what happened when I stopped performing a "dateable" version of myself and just let myself be blunt, funny, and completely unfiltered. I also share the surprise connection I walked away with, and the question I'm sitting with about the stories we all tell ourselves to avoid the things that scare us.

Please give the show a thumbs up if you liked it, and follow me so you never miss an episode!

If you liked this episode and want to support the show, please like, share, and give it a 5 star review. Your support means everything to me!

Download The Create Yourself Free App: https://subscription.createyourself.co.nz/library

Find me on my socials:

Instagram: @createyourself.nz

TikTok: @itsrachthomas

YouTube: ItsRachThomas 

Learn more about working with me:

Website: https://www.createyourself.co.nz 

Email: [email protected]

Welcome to the very first episode of the Create Yourself podcast! 

In this episode I  open up about why this launch took so long: perfectionism. As a self-described perfectionist, I almost let the fear of getting it "wrong" stop me from starting at all - which ironically is completely at odds with a podcast about being yourself.

I dig into why we chase perfection in the first place, how social media has hijacked our self perception, and how years of "performing" a polished, professional version of myself online and in business left me totally exhausted. I share what it looks like to be fully myself, the fear that made me feel like I needed to wear a mask, and why I'm finally done performing.

If you liked this episode and want to support the show, please like, share, and give it a 5 star review. Your support means everything to me!

Download The Create Yourself Free App: https://subscription.createyourself.co.nz/library

Find me on my socials:

Instagram: @createyourself.nz

TikTok: @itsrachthomas

YouTube: ItsRachThomas 

Learn more about working with me:

Website: https://www.createyourself.co.nz 

Email: [email protected]