The Cult on the Cape

What does it take to help someone leave the only world they’ve ever known?

In this episode of The Cult on the Cape, we share voices from Rock Harbor Truth’s Stand for Truth in Eastham. Kristin Hoffman talks about helping several young people escape the Community of Jesus, and survivor John Catlin shares his own story.

Bonnie closes with a call to action for everyone who believes survivors deserve to be heard—and that those still inside deserve support when they’re ready to leave.

Listen, share, and stand with us. 💙 www.rockharbortruth.org

Building a Life, Losing Myself: Elizabeth Alina’s Story (Part 3)

What happens when you leave the world you grew up in and try to build a life of your own—but discover that leaving doesn't mean leaving everything behind?

In Part 3 of Elizabeth Alina’s story, Elizabeth talks about moving to North Carolina, starting her own business, and making a tremendous amount of money, even as she struggled to manage the success she had worked so hard to achieve.

Behind the accomplishments, her life was becoming increasingly difficult. Hospitalizationsfor a digestive disorder and the end of her marriage marked painful chapters in a journey that was about much more than starting over somewhere new.

Elizabeth’s story reminds us that building an outwardly successful life doesn't automatically resolve the struggles we carry with us. The effects of our past can follow us into our relationships, our health, and our understanding of ourselves.

Join us for the next chapter of Elizabeth’s deeply personal journey as she navigates success, illness, divorce, and the complicated work of building a life beyond the world in which she was raised.

The Cult on the Cape is brought to you by Rock Harbor Truth, a survivor-led nonprofit dedicated to education, advocacy, and support for those harmed by high-control systems.

Elizabeth Alina describes the time leading up to and including her exit from the Community of Jesus in Orleans Ma.

The Ocean I Swam In: Elizabeth Alina’s Story

Elizabeth Alina’s earliest memories are memories of growing up inside the Community of Jesus.

She remembers sleeping in a basement as a small child. Being taught, in ways she didn’t yet understand, that something was wrong with her. Learning to feel shame around her body, her thoughts, her emotions, and even her desire for connection with her own mother.

As Elizabeth puts it, “That’s the ocean I swam in.”

In this deeply personal conversation, Elizabeth takes us through her childhood and adolescence inside the Community of Jesus—from her earliest memories, through the homes and families she was moved between, the constant scrutiny and “light sessions,” escalating anxiety and obsessive thoughts, and the gradual erosion of her confidence and sense of self.

For years, Elizabeth believed what she was experiencing was guilt. She didn’t understand that the overwhelming fear, insomnia, obsessive thoughts, and anxiety were symptoms of something else. She simply knew that she was always trying to figure out what she was doing wrong.

This is Part One of Elizabeth’s story.

It is a story about childhood, shame, control, family, and what happens when a child grows up believing that the very things that make her human are evidence that something is wrong with her.

The Cult on the Cape is a podcast of Rock Harbor Truth, a survivor-led nonprofit working to bring light to the experiences of those harmed by high-control systems.

Listen. Learn. Share. And help us continue telling the stories that have been silenced for decades.

What happens when survivors tell their stories—and a community chooses to listen?

On September 20th, over 100 people gathered at First Parish Brewster Unitarian Universalist Church as Shawn DeLude, Tim DeLude, and Bonnie Zampino shared their personal stories of growing up inside the Community of Jesus.

Introduced by Susan Smith of First Parish Brewster UU, the event explored our experiences within a high-control religious community and the Community of Jesus’ presence and reach in Brewster, including through the performing arts.

This is the live audio from that evening.

Three survivors. One room. Nearly 100 people listening.

This is Voices of Truth.

Rock Harbor Truth gathered in Brewster for a Stand for Truth near the Performing Arts Center—a building survivors say was constructed, in part, through the labor of children from the Community of Jesus.

In this special episode, hear the voices from that gathering.

Together, they speak about abuse, accountability, survivor support, and the courage it takes to tell the truth in the very place where so much was hidden.

Bonnie continues her discussion with psychotherapist Kari Fillian, LICSW, about how faith can become a weapon in high-control environments. Together, they explore ways to heal from this kind of abuse. .Bonnie connects Kari’s clinical insight to her own experiences at the Community of Jesus—including “light sessions,” chronic exhaustion, family separation, and the regulation of emotions, sexuality, and personal choice. They also examine why leaving a high-control group is so difficult—and why the effects can remain in the body long after someone is physically free.

⁠Kari Fillian Psychotherapy

In this deeply personal conversation, Bonnie speaks with psychotherapist Kari Fillian, LICSW, about how faith can become a weapon in high-control environments. Together, they explore the BITE Model of control, the use of shame and forced confession, and the ways religious trauma can disrupt a person’s identity, relationships, nervous system, and ability to trust themselves.

Bonnie connects Kari’s clinical insight to her own experiences at the Community of Jesus—including “light sessions,” chronic exhaustion, family separation, and the regulation of emotions, sexuality, and personal choice. They also examine why leaving a high-control group is so difficult—and why the effects can remain in the body long after someone is physically free.

Kari Fillian Psychotherapy

In Part Two of her story, Becky reflects on parenting a daughter with profound autism, confronting the lasting effects of Grenville and The Community of Jesus, and questioning the faith she inherited. Through fear, exhaustion, and deep self-examination, she discovers acceptance, a more expansive understanding of love, and the possibility that the life she has built is enough.

Becky Hathaway Dirksen was seven years old when her family moved to Grenville Christian College to live the life mandated by the Community of Jesus. What followed was a childhood governed by rigid schedules, forced labor, constant correction, family separation, and spiritual teachings that equated suffering with holiness and love with giving up what mattered most.

In Part One of her story, Becky describes trying desperately to become the “good” person Grenville demanded—while never knowing exactly what was wrong with who she already was. She reflects on the lasting damage of being taught to distrust herself, the loneliness of being sent to Bermuda as an unpaid worker, and the dream of horses and Montana that became her imagined path to freedom.

Becky eventually left determined to begin her life. But, as she explains, appearing resilient is not the same as escaping unharmed: “The fallout comes later.”