The Daily Ampersand

Happy 49th Birthday Doctor Who! As a special celebration John and Lawrence natter through 1983's twentieth anniversary episode The Five Doctors. There are sweary words, noisy biscuits and mild defamation of character throughout. Listeners with photosensitive epilepsy will be OK though. There are no flashing lights whatsoever.

John and Lawrence take their paltry knowledge for a walk round the block in this commentary for the final episode in the current run of Doctor Who. Some swears happen, mostly by accident. And obviously it's Philip Glenister. Not whatever John says.

The coffee has been flowing like water. There are Toffee Crisps in the fridge. Thus John and Lawrence manage to talk through the fourth episode of Doctor Who season 7 without recourse to any of the major swears. They are both sorry about any of the things they might have inadvertently said about Woodsy Allen. They think he's great.

John and Lawrence, when they finally get around to it, talk through the third episode of Doctor Who series seven. Some of the facts are right this time, but by no means many of them. There's an exciting bit when the postman turns up with an Amazon parcel too, so that's nice.

Dangerously under-caffeinated, John and Lawrence talk through the second episode of Doctor Who series 7. Among the things they get wrong are the name of the director (it's Saul Metzstein), the name of the actress playing Nefertiti (it's Riann Steele) and the name of Susan Foreman's beau (which is David Campbell, not David Cameron like John thought). Facts, eh?

Lawrence and John talk through Asylum of the Daleks. There are three swears. All of them John's.