The Dan Le Batard Show

"When I was a horny young kid, I was like, 'Damn. Nicole Kidman.'"

JuJu is here with his Top 5 Tom Cruise Moments and to clean up the show, compliment Greg Cote, update the Polls, and give Tony an on-ramp to continue promoting his Substack, but first... You know about that Eyes Wide Shut?

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"I got into sports media because I like sports."

We discuss the Holly Rowe story with Jess, and she tells us why she is so tired of constantly talking about incidents like this instead of the actual games themselves. We also touch on a lot of CFB topics, the WNBA's return after a break for the FIBA World Cup, and the worst flight experiences we've ever had. Does Mike Elko look like he should be walking around with a candle on a little plate? Plus, Roy claims the U is back because they're returning to Nike as their uniform provider, and Greg Cote gives us the worst two minutes in the show's history.

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"Why do we always have Vaudeville as our go-to?"

After dominating Colin Cowherd in Week 1, 5-1, Clark Connors is back for another swing at Celebrity Prognosticator, and Dan might never let him go. He offers his condolences to Greg Cote after his layoff at the Miami Herland, and it seems the two superstars may be making peace. Afterward, we discuss Eddie Johnson claiming Kawhi Leonard may be held out of the Hall of Fame for a couple of years, New York Mets fans applauding Pete Alonso's 300th home run, and whether the standard for the New York Yankees is too high.

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"What's with this cobbler bullshit?"

Remember when James Franklin said "Hey, Michael," over and over again? We got the Michael. Michael Howes of the Baltimore Sun joins the show. That leads us to an important question: is it right for a reporter to refer to a coach as "Coach" during a media session? Plus, Greg and Dan share stories of tough interactions with Don Shula, Zaslow makes Tom Cruise the Derrick Henry of movies, and Troy Aikman contradicts himself.

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"But Tati's Llamas went 10-6 in Week 1."

Chris introduces Trysta to the concept of the PFPI, Dan rummages for pennies, Greg shares his comfort with low PSI in his tires, and Zas, Roy, and Tony dismiss Pablo's long-winded & self-aggrandizing question to Adam Silver.

Today's cast: Dan, Greg, Trysta, Roy, Chris, Tony, and Zaslow.

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"My brother was enjoying his birthday!"

JuJu is here to rename the Joker of the Day, and he has some Show Awards, Flowers of the Day, and hey... anyone wanna talk Sydney Sweeney?

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"Hey, Michael."

Is Lane Kiffin going to get the LeBron-in-Cleveland treatment with his upcoming return to Ole Miss? Is it okay for Arch Manning to laugh at AI of Steve Sarkisian hitting Holly Rowe? Has Dan Lanning already been left behind in college football? Will Tony Romo ever work again?

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"Week 1 is a prolific liar."

Kyle Brandt has the best jawline in sports TV (maybe outside of Howie Long). He's here ahead of the release of his book, "Do You: How To Bet On Yourself by Being Yourself," to discuss the strength of sideline reporters, his Chicago Bears and their electric offense, whether Derrick Henry is the best RB of all time, and if Sydney Sweeney stole his look. Plus, we get to the first Tony's Top 5 of the season, which introduces the first Tony Snell Cross Sport Wind Sprint Award.

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"As there is in all of football..."

Dan watched the first half of last night's MNF game, then went back to take notes instead of watching the second half, but while he did that, Zas watched his stories, and Greg watched the Emmy Awards. Plus, Greg invents a new phrase just before announcing some HUGE breaking news regarding his Top 70 Catchphrase Countdown.

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"The dog never does his business when I walk him."

Greg Cote is here to walk us through how McClatchy informed him he'd been laid off from the Miami Herald, what he plans to do with his free time, how he'll handle the rest of his career, and the column he's most proud of. But first, the Jai Alai season starts today; Zas and Trysta show some truly awful judgment, and Jeremy, unsurprisingly, makes it all about himself.

Today's cast: Dan, Greg, Trysta, Roy, Chris, Jeremy, and Zaslow.

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