Leaving a high-control religion can feel like stepping off the edge of a cliff. The isolation, the loss of community, the whispers (or outright shunning) from those you once called family—it’s enough to make you question everything. And in the midst of it all, when your body is finally processing years of suppressed anxiety and depression, it’s easy to fall into old fears: Am I being punished? Is this the enemy attacking me? 

In our season finale of The Dark Side of Devotion, we unpack the deep loneliness and confusion that can follow religious deconstruction, the emotional and physical toll of shedding years of indoctrination, and how to navigate the dark nights of the soul without falling into shame or fear. We also explore the spiritual journeys that can follow—whether that means rediscovering faith on your own terms, or something entirely different.

This episode is for anyone who has felt abandoned after leaving, struggled with self-doubt, or needed reassurance that healing is not a straight line.

⚠ Disclaimer: This discussion is based on personal experiences and is not a substitute for professional mental health support. If you're struggling, please reach out to a qualified therapist or counselor.

If this episode resonates with you, let us know in the comments or share it with someone who needs to hear it. And though this is our season finale, we’re not going anywhere! Follow us for more content as we continue to expose religious abuse, share survivor stories, and help each other heal.❤️‍🩹

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In this episode of The Dark Side of Devotion, we open up about one of the most pressing and painful aspects of our time in the church—the finances. From being devoted members who genuinely believed in the pastor’s words and eagerly took on financial commitments, to becoming assistants who were expected to fund church responsibilities out of our own pockets, and finally, to seeing the full picture behind the scenes as a pastor and wife, we witnessed firsthand the financial coercion, manipulation, and undue pressure placed on members.

We discuss how campaigns, tithes, and offerings were presented as acts of faith—yet behind closed doors, the church’s hyper-fixation on money was undeniable. We share our experiences of counseling people who were financially struggling, only to be placed in the uncomfortable position of asking them for more. We also talk about the chaos of counting and reporting money during the Campaign of Israel, and how the urgency and pressure from leadership made it clear where the institution’s priorities truly lay.

We are sharing our personal experiences and perspectives in this episode, and our intention is to bring awareness to the financial expectations placed upon members of high-control religious organizations.

⚠️ Disclaimer: The views and experiences shared in this episode are solely our own. We are speaking from our personal time in the church and do not claim to represent all churches or individuals. Our goal is to share our journey and bring awareness to the realities we encountered. This episode is intended for discussion and informational purposes only.

Let us know your thoughts in the comments. Have you ever felt pressured to give beyond your means in a religious setting?

Listen now and join the conversation. 🗣🎙️

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In this episode of The Dark Side of Devotion, we want to explore the cult-like tactics used in youth groups of high-demand religions. Our personal experiences are in the Youth Power Group (YPG)—the Universal Church’s youth ministry that, on the surface, appears to be a positive and empowering space. But behind the vibrant activities and promises of a better future, many young people are being manipulated, exploited, and groomed for lifelong servitude to the church.

We expose how the church reels in vulnerable youth, convincing them to dedicate their time, money, and even their futures to the ministry. Many young men become auxiliary pastors, sacrificing their education and career opportunities to serve the church full-time—often without pay and under extreme pressure. Meanwhile, young women are groomed to become pastors’ wives, conditioned to submit to a life of rigid expectations and obedience.

For many who go on to become auxiliaries, the reality is far from the spiritual fulfillment they were promised. They become the backbone of the church, taking on the bulk of the labor while senior pastors take a step back. The church demands everything from them—time, energy, and total devotion—while offering little in return. Many drop out of school, abandon scholarships, and give up promising futures, all in pursuit of what they are told is a divine calling.

This is the harsh reality of many youth groups in high-demand environments and in this episode, we share our personal experiences.

If you were part of the YPG or something similar, or know someone who has, we’d love to hear your story. Share your thoughts in the comments, tag someone who needs to hear this, and don’t forget to subscribe for more episodes exposing the hidden truths of high-control religious groups.

#thedarksideofdevotion #podcast #religioustrauma #cults #religiouscults #healingreligioustrauma #deconstruction #spirituality #highdemandreligion #speakyourtruth #survivinguniversal #survivinguniversalusa #exiurd #exuckg #exvangelical

In this episode of The Dark Side of Devotion, we take a deep dive into "The Love Therapy", a widely promoted service within the Universal Church of the Kingdom of God (UCKG/IURD). Marketed as a way to help individuals and couples find love and strengthen relationships, "The Love Therapy" presents itself as a path to emotional and spiritual fulfillment. But behind the polished messages and orchestrated testimonies lies a more troubling reality. Toxic religious leaders exploit vulnerabilities for control and financial gain.

If you've ever attended "The Love Therapy", know someone who has, or are just curious about the hidden tactics of high-control religious organizations, this episode is for you.

▶️ Subscribe now and turn on notifications so you don’t miss future episodes uncovering the truth about religious abuse and healing from spiritual trauma.

🎧 Available on YouTube, Spotify, and Apple Podcasts. Let’s keep exposing the truth and reclaiming our power!🔥

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In Part 2 of Tony’s story, he takes us deeper into his experience within the church—where the abuse didn’t stop, it only evolved.

After years of being conditioned to accept suffering as love, Tony stepped into the class where he was met with relentless control, emotional and psychological abuse, and the crushing weight of expectations designed to break him and those like him. The same system that once made him feel wanted now used him, manipulated him, and drained him of everything he had to give.

From spiritual coercion to pressure and punishment for questioning authority, Tony’s journey exposes the dark reality behind the pulpit. His story is a powerful reminder of how these organizations trap not just followers, but also those who serve within them.

🔔 Don’t forget to like, comment, and subscribe for more survivor stories and discussions on religious trauma, cult dynamics, and healing.

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In this powerful episode of The Dark Side of Devotion, we begin a two-part deep dive into Tony’s story—his childhood, the oppression he faced, and how his early experiences made him vulnerable to the conditioning of a high-control religious group, resulting in him eventually becoming a Pastor of the UCKG.

Tony opens up about his life before the church: the abuse, the shelter living, and the feeling of never truly belonging. From a young age, he was conditioned to endure hardship, to suppress his own needs, and to seek validation wherever he could find it. So when he finally found a community within the church, it felt like love—like acceptance. But was it real? Or was it just another form of control disguised as care?

His journey sheds light on how early-life experiences can make us susceptible to manipulation, especially by groups that prey on the vulnerable. This episode is an emotional, eye-opening exploration of the ways trauma and indoctrination intertwine.

Watch now and let us know your thoughts in the comments. Have you ever experienced something similar?

🔔 Don’t forget to like, comment, and subscribe for more episodes exposing the truth behind The Universal Church, religious trauma, and other high-control groups.

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In this episode, we attempt to continue Stephanie’s story… but, true to form, we take a few detours along the way. While touching on Stephanie’s journey, we also dive into a range of unexpected but important conversations—some deep, some hilarious, all unfiltered. From the realities of deconstruction to the strange ways high-control religions shaped our lives, this is our truth and our experience.

Join us as we unpack our experiences, challenge harmful beliefs, and maybe (definitely) get sidetracked. Because healing isn’t linear, and neither is this episode.

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In this episode, we dive into Stephanie’s story—a journey that began in vulnerability and led her deep into the heart of a high-control religious group. She shares how she was drawn in, slowly immersing herself in church life, moving through the ranks to become an assistant, and dedicating nearly every moment to its various groups and activities.

But with that devotion came loss—loss of time, loss of connection with family, and, most painfully, a loss of identity. What happens when a place that once felt like a refuge becomes a prison? How does one begin to untangle themselves from a belief system that has consumed their entire life?

This is Part 1 of Stephanie’s powerful and deeply personal story.

Tune in, reflect, and join the conversation in the comments below. 👇

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🎙 The Dark Side of Devotion - Episode 2: Sara's Story

In this powerful episode of The Dark Side of Devotion, Sara shares her personal story as a bishop's daughter growing up in a high-demand religious environment. From the pressure of being the "perfect example" to the congregation to navigating the contradictions and abuse behind the scenes, Sara reveals the emotional, psychological, and spiritual toll of her upbringing.

Join us as Sara opens up about her journey of healing from religious trauma, and finding her own voice outside the confines of this religious institution. This raw and inspiring episode sheds light on the challenges faced by those born into leadership families within controlling religious organizations.

🔗 Listen Now:

📌 Healing, deprogramming, and reclaiming autonomy

📌 Navigating life after leaving a high-demand religion

📌 Insights for survivors of religious abuse

🌟 Don’t forget to like, subscribe, and share if you resonate with Sara’s story or know someone who might. Let’s build a community of healing and support together.

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In the debut episode of The Dark Side of Devotion, co-hosts Anthony, Stephanie, and Sara come together to share how their paths first crossed as teenagers in the Universal Church, a global religious institution with a controversial history. Sara, the daughter of a bishop and born into the church, joins Anthony and Stephanie, who entered the church as teenagers, to recount their shared experiences and how they reconnected years after leaving. This episode also provides an introduction to the church’s history and practices, offering essential context for listeners unfamiliar with its inner workings. Start here as the hosts lay the foundation for a podcast uncovering the realities of life inside—and beyond—the Universal Church.

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