I'm not gonna lie, this one was slightly relieving and slightly uncomfortable to record because I had to remember the really ugly arguments with the horrible things I said, and the horrible things he did. So much stress, so many tears, so much love & so much bitterness. To be very clear, this episode isn't to slander my exes, what got me through my breakup was hearing other girls on podcasts sharing their story, their honesty with their anger & bitterness, their growth, their lessons & faith.
For my loyal hearted girls.. At some point you realize that holding onto something that keeps hitting a wall, is actually keeping you and that other person from being on their authentic path.. that was a hard pill to swallow.. cause you literally want him to CHOOSE YOU AND AT THE SAME TIME YOU WANT to drag the guy across concrete LOL.... but it's so true.. because when you're so hurt, and you hate him and everyone in his life SO MUCH, it's hard to see the higher value of life.. it's hard to see from a place of maturity. My brain was so raw from crying and being in the dumps for so long in that relationship, and he was stressed out too!! My stress caused his stress which caused my stress which caused anger and resentment and omg girl just find the strength to remove yourself for the benefit of both of you!!
So much has changed, I've learned and grown so much, of course I have so much regret for things I said, and how I dealt with things, and I know there are girls listening to this or reading this that feel the exact same. But my lovey... don't be so hard on yourself when you are SO stressed out, your hormones are all over the places, your not eating well you have no place to yourself, the worst is gonna come out of you.. I've been there & experienced it.. but life is forgiving, and THANK GOD for growth..
For my girlies grieving.. I love you!! you got this , I promise there's a man looking for his missing rib <3
