In this episode of The Father's Truth, host Alan Donovan talks to Gabe Kessler, a 41-year-old firefighter from Southern California who experienced his mother lying to him about his father. Gabe explains how his mother had lied to him for most of his life, and at the age of 42 he was finally able to meet his biological father for the first time. Alan encourages Gabe to share his story and stresses the importance of bringing the truth about fatherhood out of the darkness. Gabe talks about how his mother's lies affected him and how he eventually confronted her about the truth. He ends the conversation by sending a message to all fathers to stay strong and fight for their rights.
HIGHLIGHTS
I don't know about on a daily basis. I think the thing probably that gets to me the most because like I told you, my dad, Bobby, my biological dad, he texts me a couple of times a week, or he'll call. And when I text him back, I always say Bob. Right? I never say dad. And I kind of feel a little bit guilty about that, right? Because I'm like, fuck. I just feel a certain type of way about it. In a way, I kind of feel bad because I'm like, fuck.
And then I have an aunt who was murdered a while back. Her killer actually just died in prison, like a year ago. I never got to meet her. There's just so much stuff that I miss. And I look at my brother and my relationship and how many cool fucking memories we have and how strong our relationship is. I'm like, fuck, what if I had two more of those relationships? Dude, that would be so cool. But I don't have them. It's like, I do have another brother and another sister, but I'll never have a relationship with them like I do with my brother.
Yeah, there's so many things that I think about that suck about it, right? The grandparent aspect of it really bums me out because not because my grandparents weren't blood. I love them. They were the most beautiful souls on this fucking planet by far. Amazing people. I'm so bummed, though, that I never got to meet my dad's parents. Because if one set of grandparents was like that, imagine having two sets of grandparents like that like, holy shit.
Sister and like a fucking cousin that grew up in my neighborhood that I didn't even know was my cousin and aunts and uncles. And it's gnarly. I still can't even wrap my head around it. Sitting here talking to you about it makes me realize, like, holy shit, I still really haven't grasped the fucking size of this thing. Yeah, it's hard to wrap your head around it. It's fucking so just like an unfathomable thing, right? It's like not something that you think would ever happen to you.
That's going to be at the end of the day, and I tell fathers this all the time when it comes down to the suicide aspect of things, like when a father becomes suicidal. And I've had a lot of fathers reach out to me that were on their last edge. They were on the edge of the rope and they were going to commit suicide. And I said, do you really want this to be the legacy, your legacy that you leave your kids, and this is going to be her legacy? I know they're two entirely separate things, but it's going to be the same thing. This is going to be her legacy.