The Feminist Mommies

Feminism resonates with individual choice. The choice of one woman is not the same as another. Does the feminist doctrine counter abortion? This is a debate that seems like a conflict of rights: the right of women to control their own bodies and the right for children to be born. Can you be a feminist and pro-life? Co-hosts Shannon and Vanessa dive into how different countries and different individuals view abortion, why some women choose one or the other and whether this is a feminism issue or not.


Resources from this episode
https://www.guttmacher.org/journals/psrh/2005/reasons-us-women-have-abortions-quantitative-and-qualitative-perspectives 

Sexual Education is an important topic for our kids. It's not just about teaching anatomy and where babies come from, but early sexual education reduces the risk of abuse, STI's, unwanted teen pregnancies, and also empowers our kids about their bodies. In this episode co-hosts Vanessa and Shannon discuss the book, Beyond Birds and Bees by Bonnie J. Rough and how it changed their approach to discussing this topic with their young kids. Early and open conversations about sex promotes equality and reduces shame. Have you started these conversations with your kids?

When men get angry, their power and respect increases. When women get angry, their power and respect decreases. Many women are uncomfortable with expressing anger or seeing it in others. It’s as if men and boys only have the right to express and experience anger. Girls are not taught to acknowledge or manage anger so much as to fear, ignore, hide or transform it. How is this tied to patriarchal shame and what can we do to liberate ourselves and teach our children about expressing disagreement, anger and overall, just using our voices? Co-hosts Shannon and Vanessa discuss their own experiences with anger in family situations, with friends and in a professional environment and how they're teaching their daughters to have confidence in their feelings and voice.

Reference articles:

How Parents Can Help Their Daughters Express Anger in Healthy Ways and Why It Matters, AMightyGirl.com

Rage Becomes Her - The Power of Women's Anger

We want the best for our kids. We hope for them to make more of themselves than we did. Whether that means happiness, good will to the world, broadened experiences, career success, financial independence, or healthy relationships. But what happens when your daughter tells you that her ambition is to get married and be a stay-at-home-mom? Is focusing on being a mom good enough for your daughter? What if it was your son who said this? As feminist moms, do our own values and desire for equality interfere with our expectations of our kids? Co-hosts Shannon and Vanessa discuss stereotypes of SAHMs and working moms and how their feminist values influence these perceptions and shape their hopes and dreams for their kids.

The Black Lives Matters movement has woken a generation from across races to acknowledge the white privilege and systemic racism in our culture and society.  As parents, it is our responsibility to teach our children tolerance and acceptance for people who are different from them. Yet for many families, diversity is not a natural part of their day-to-day lives. How do we teach our children and lead by example when our friends, family and neighbors look and act like us? Is having a diverse community important to raising our children to be accepting of diversity? Co-hosts Vanessa and Shannon discuss how they're raising their kids to embrace diversity and what you can do to dispel harmful stereotypes. 

It starts at birth. Well intentioned grandparents, friends, aunts, uncles making reference to little baby boys being ‘heartbreakers’ and little baby girls being ‘a tease’. The sexualization of children begins almost immediately and kids are put into a box before they’ve even learned to sit up. Before a child even has a chance to confirm their identity as male or female, adults are making assumptions and encouraging inappropriate behavior. What can we as parents do to stop this cycle and how can we create boundaries for our children? Co-hosts Shannon and Vanessa discuss their own sexist experiences and how they undermine our daughters' self-esteem and self-worth.

Women are taught from a very early age that we should fear one another. That only one woman can make it to the top. Where does this competitive mindset come from and how can we stop the cycle with our own daughters? Co-hosts Vanessa and Shannon discuss their experiences through the years with mean girls and how they're raising kind humans.

References in the episode:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Female_intrasexual_competition

Fight Like a Girl by Clementine Ford - https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/29615052-fight-like-a-girl  

The role of mom is life-changing and no one can prepare you for it. There is no shortage of learning that needs to happen and support you need from fellow moms. But what happens when you’re the only ‘mom’ in your friend group? What happens to your hobbies when you become a mom? Friendships can change, priorities can change, your career can change, even your relationship with your spouse can change. Co-hosts Shannon and Vanessa discuss how their relationships changed when they became mothers and what took them by surprise.

We all know the role sexism plays in society. We have been witnesses to it countless times. Though what role does it play in our own homes? Research shows that women are taking on the majority of unpaid work, in some cases, double that of men. What impact does this have on women's mental health and what are some of the root causes of this unequal divide? Co-hosts Vanessa and Shannon discuss how unpaid work is reflected in their own household dynamics and how to move toward a more equitable divide.

References in the episode

Don’t Be Grateful That Dad Does His Share https://www.theatlantic.com/ideas/archive/2019/05/mothers-shouldnt-be-grateful-their-husbands-help/588787/

 Breadwinning Mothers Continue to Be the U.S. Norm https://www.americanprogress.org/issues/women/reports/2019/05/10/469739/breadwinning-mothers-continue-u-s-norm/

Time use: Total work burden, unpaid work, and leisure
https://www150.statcan.gc.ca/n1/pub/89-503-x/2015001/article/54931-eng.htm 

Invisible Women: Data Bias in a World Designed for Men by Caroline Criado Perez - https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/41104077-invisible-women      

They say it takes a village to raise a child but what happens when your village doesn’t share the same values, culture, beliefs? For many families this may take the shape of familial relations - grandparents disagree with how you’re choosing to raise your kids - or community relations - you live far from family, maybe in a foreign country or surrounded by people who don’t look or act like you. How do you find genuine connections of support? Co-hosts Shannon and Vanessa discuss their experiences with family boundaries and how they found their supportive community of moms.