The Russian author Leo Tolstoy cornered the market on the best opening line to a novel, ever. In Anna Karenina, he wrote, “Happy families are all alike; every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way.”

Bible! Reformation! Climate Action!

Just in time for Halloween: The writer Kathleen Norris calls this ‘the scariest story I know about the Bible.’

I hate horror movies. Watching a movie where you spend half your time waiting for something terrible to happen, and the other half watching the terrible thing happen, is not my idea of a good time. I never liked garden-variety slasher films to begin with, but now even the new brand of intellectual, artistic gore-fest is off the table. The Coen Brothers, who I used to love, are forever ruined for me. Quentin Tarantino is in the doghouse. The reason for my newfound sensitivity? I had a kid. Having kids cracks you open in a way you’ve never been opened; it makes you vulnerable, and anything dark or violent in your immediate vicinity leaks into all the new fissures in your soul. It makes it impossible to watch the evening news, let alone The Lovely Bones. I manufacture enough daymares and nightmares in my imagination now, without any help from Hollywood.

Last week Laura Ruth kicked off our sermon series on the Bible with a whirlwind tour of the 66 books of the Old Testament and the New Testament. She did a remarkable job of summing up the WHAT of the Bible, and began to get us into the HOW. HOW should we read it? Is there a right way, a wrong way?

Today, Molly and I begin a five week series on the Bible. Today, I want to introduce you to the Bible. My sermon is the ABCs and 123s of the B.I.B.L.E.

We in this church are the kind of people who have a lot of things going on all the time, and so if there are any of you today who just don’t feel like you have the time to make it through a 12-15 minute sermon, I completely understand, and I will do you the favor of telling you at the beginning what is coming at the end: Rest, and Serve. Rest, and Serve. Now if you have pressing things you need to do, if you are Lucy Arnaz and you’re falling further and further behind the chocolates quota on the quality-control conveyor belt, then go. We don’t want you to be anxious. We’re about setting people free, here.

Brothers and sisters! It is so good to be with you today…

GREETINGS I'm delighted to be worshiping with you here in Somerville. First Church has a great reputation in the Massachusetts Conference as a vital growing congregation engaged with your community. We are inspired by your creativity and I know that a lot of churches copy your ideas. I love that your service today began with a burst of humor; a church that laughs is definitely on the right track. Mark Twain wasn't describing you in his famous quip: "If all the people who sleep in church were laid end to end, they'd be a lot more comfortable."

Today we celebrate the life of St. Francis of Assisi, the patron saint of animals and of ecology. Although St. Francis’ feast day is not until Oct. 4, we in the free church tradition, and we at First Church Somerville, in keeping with our idea that the church is made for the people, and not the other way around, decided that it is better to celebrate the Feast of St. Francis in the summer.