This week, Melanie kicks things off with bad puns, we love Butterfingers for all the wrong reasons, Melanie strikes out on Halloween drugs, Brianne will not engage, Melanie is a hell of a fluffer, Brianne gives Melanie a surprise promotion to mayor, 36 steams of pee cannot stop an inferno, a zip code is eliminated, Melanie isn't a flat-earther, no one cares about drinking from garden hoses, and we are praying for Hot Garbage Town, USA.

Content warnings: trash/bad smells, fire, urine, gruesome dead deer description, death of a cat, terminal illnesses, child in peril who survives, xenophobic quotes, science denial, giardia, rats.

Links:
A Town with a Hot Problem Decides Not to Move Mountains but to Move Itself
Centralia Loses Another Resident, Home Abandoned
Centralia, Pennsylvania
Centralia, Pennsylvania’s least-populated town, has been sitting on top of a burning mine fire for 60 years
Centralia’s ‘Graffiti Highway’ is finally getting erased
How the Mine Fire Nearly Killed Todd Domboski
I Live In Centralia, PA: It's America's Creepiest Ghost Town
Remaining handful of residents can stay in Centralia for the rest of their lives, settlement says
Silent Hill: True Story & Real Town's History Explained
This Mine Fire Has Been Burning for Over 50 Years