What about the “inward ordinances?”  

Inward ordinances happen inside a holy temple, in “holy places.”  

There are the washings, anointings, endowments, and sealings we have all been taught about that take place in holy temple buildings.  

But we are also told that our body is a temple.  

If you have read Heather’s essay, “The Two Veils,” you are aware of some of these inward ordinances: intimacy, conception, pregnancy and birth.  

I would add to that list, menstruation and lactation. 

These girls are preparing to shed blood as did the Savior.  

They are a holy place where ordinance work will take place beginning with menstruation and continuing through other the other inward ordinances.

In last week episode we discussed different ways how to help our daughters through their first period.

One of our listeners was willing to share with us how she prepared her daughter for coming of age and how they celebrated it together.

Hear her experience and a few others.

Then here 3 tips to create a Red Party that is ideal for your daughter!

I’ve been thinking a lot about the rite of passage my daughter will soon be passing through 

as she leaves her girlhood body behind and transforms into a woman.

For me, that transformation was frightening.

I want it to be positive for her.

Blood is loaded with meaning in the scriptures. 

It is life. 

It is death. 

The middle of each cycle demonstrates the body’s deep investment in the continuation of life. 

Sometimes that investment continues for nine months. 

Sometimes that potential for life passes away, 

and the body cradles that fallen egg in a brief embrace 

before letting it go to make way for new life again.

So much of what happens to and through our bodies, as women, 

is a strange mixture of the life/death dichotomy. 

When I think of this dichotomy, 

I think of Eve. 

I personally believe, as she crossed the threshold from Eden to Earth life, 

she too began to bleed for the first time. 

She broke through that red “caution tape,” 

bringing life and death simultaneously. 

And it was good

When my daughters cross their thresholds, 

I want them to be glad, like Eve. 

I want them to rejoice. 

I want them to feel honored to follow in the footsteps of the women who have come before them. 

The path of womanhood (and the womanly cycle) 

is certainly a balance of sorrow and joy, life and death, pleasure and pain, 

but I want them to move forward into that future confident in their ability to weather those highs and lows with grace, 

surrounded by support from the people who love them.

It is hard to let go of that phase of having babies.

Choosing how many babies to have is different for everybody.

It is between you and the Lord.

Robyn and I talk about letting go of guilt about stopping having babies as well as how we shifted to knowing we are done.

It was hard to make that determination on our own and going to the Lord for guidance is helpful.

It is a beautiful thing to know our life giving is not done on this earth, that there really will be another phase in the eternities of life giving and we both look forward to that.

I ran across this poem in an old Ensign magazine and felt it appropriate to share for Pregnancy and Infant Awareness Loss Month.  

Although many generations stand between her and the women of today, the bond of having experienced loss bridges the gap.  

Sending our love to all those families who have experienced pregnancy and or infant loss.

In todays episode we talk about very early pregnancy loss and how sometimes it is hard to feel supported in your feelings.

Sometimes people don't validate what you are experiencing.

But the loss is very real!

Listen to Heather and Lani's experience and get some reassurance. 

When I went through a miscarriage years ago, I finally took time to really read the stories of loss in The Gift of Giving Life.

They brought me comfort and peace.

This is my story of getting pregnant at 41 and then my miscarriage and how I handled the emotions that came with that loss.

Did you know that Dr. Ellis Shipp, one of Utah’s first female doctors (who trained many women to become nurses and midwives), wrote a hymn in the hymn book? I had forgotten until yesterday when my friend (who is mourning her second miscarriage) posted this on facebook…

In my interview with Lani, the birth story she chose to share was a miscarriage that felt so spiritual.

She didn’t expect that it could be spiritual, but it was.

“Everything relating to preparing to have children, getting pregnant, giving birth have been a few of the ways I have had the most spiritual experiences of my life…”

We delve deep into how to help your friend in todays episode.

But here are the steps simplified.

1 – Let her talk as much or as little as she wants. 

2 – Share your experience, but be careful not to project your own (or others’) experiences onto hers. 

3 – Similarly, be careful about making assumptions about the status of this miscarriage as it relates to the mother’s family. 

4 – Just do something.