[Just a quick note from Trinity: I have finished moving and all that life crapola, so with my new schedule, we are releasing on Fridays now. Frankly, Friday is the best I've hit for, like, a month! I think I even released on a Saturday and Sunday in there! Please understand that demolishing this system of exploitation and frenzied, individualized labor that pollutes North America is the only way this podcast is ever gonna release on time every week. Please, let this motivate you to great heights, listener!]

They made the !@#$%^& horses white, chat. They made 'em white! Because apparently the Greek Gods are also blond and white. That's like me saying brown-haired, blue-eyed people should rule the Earth because that's what Jimmy Neutron is. That's not even an argument, you just read a fiction book! How any of this could pass as science or even be accepted by the general public as facts is probably a testament to the dynamism of the miseducation program of the failing United States. Every time the U.S. ruling class is restructured by history, someone paints another Aryan horse. It's chapter 22 of The History of White People!

Chapters:

(00:12:22) The Discussion Zone

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Listener, we may present to you a serious and disciplined image of ourselves, dedicated to the study of history. But we are also just people, and sometimes people bork a recording so bad that the episode simply cannot be made! And to compound it, this week Trinity has been separated from her recording equipment. So, in lieu of reading this week, please enjoy us running this show completely off the rails! You're gonna get Buzzfeed quizzes, you're gonna get jokes about boy bands, you're gonna get a book episode later this month to make up for it! And you're gonna see why we decided to keep this and also to re-record the real ep later! It's time for the hosts to run roughshod over our educational mission and be silly goobers for an hour! It's not chapter 20 of The History of White People!

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Our book is not The History of White People by Nell Irvin Painter. You can't get a ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠copy from the publisher here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or any of the other retailers linked there.

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We did it chat. We got to the part with the fascism. The real-deal that makes the world worse in every conceivable way and haunts us until this very day. What that? No, not Germany in World War 2, the United States in World War 1! This week, we learn about the pogroms and Americanization campaigns that swept the nation in the early 1900's to force assimilation on everyone or send them to die on the other side of the Atlantic. Oh, and also to send the national guard to oppress literal millions of striking workers. What's that (again)? You don't feel like that is meaningfully distinct from the behavior of the American regime at any point in American history? Well, you're right. But it's different now, because America has machine guns and artillery, and that's so much worse for workers everywhere. At least the Soviets are here now and will one day ensure fascism doesn't consume the globe. It's chapter 21 of The History of White People!

Chapters:

(00:16:49) The Discussion Zone

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Our book is The History of White People by Nell Irvin Painter. You can get a ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠copy from the publisher here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or any of the other retailers linked there.

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This episode is being released only to verified listeners. If you are not a long-headed U.S. veteran with at least a mental age of 13.08 and a dysfunctional family history, you are not permitted entry into this podcast. It's chapter 20 of The History of White People!

Chapters:

(00:10:42) The Discussion Zone

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Our book is The History of White People by Nell Irvin Painter. You can get a ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠copy from the publisher here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or any of the other retailers linked there.

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Oh listener, this week we have to talk about a very important literary subject intimately related to our study of Western Imperial history. Truly, it is a podcast episode that must be made! Because art is apparently disconnected from reality and its consequences according to Vladimir Nabokov, the author of this week's book, Lolita! More specifically, the 1962 Stanley Kubrick adaptation and the 1997 Adrian Lyne adaptation. If we have to live in the society built in fawning reverence for the CSA of yore, then we might as well learn what the last ding-dang century of Western film has done with it.

And just to state it up front, this is mostly an episode about the sexual abuse of children, even more than usual for our podcast about American history! So, you know, decide for yourself if you want to listen to us tear this terrible author a new one.

You know what they always say listener: the children are our future. Unless we stop them now. This week, we're taking a romp through the early eugenics movement and the slew of guys who are still very respected among the ruling class today! I don't think I have to tell you how much this era sucks, it didn't meaningfully end until after you were born! It's chapters 18 & 19 of The History of White People!

Chapters:

(00:20:26) The Discussion Zone

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Our book is The History of White People by Nell Irvin Painter. You can get a ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠copy from the publisher here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or any of the other retailers linked there.

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Theodore Roosevelt is a man remembered in America for his progressive ideals, which is frankly the most on-it's-face example of Imperialist bull pocky I can think of! The man who shelled the Philippines and earnestly studied the concentration camps of Spanish Cuba?? Nonsense. He is an evil man from an evil place. Tune in this week and you may even hear one of the hosts integrate an emotional knowledge of The Great Satan's ambitions! Also, this ep was 24 hours late because Trinity has literally been moving apartments for the last month and it's frankly astounding a podcast has been produced at all in that time. She is very tired and asks that you hate Theodore Roosevelt on her behalf, that she may sleep face-down on the floor and yet still know in her heart that the world is healing. It's chapter 17 of The History of White People!

Chapters:

(00:14:22) The Discussion Zone

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Our book is The History of White People by Nell Irvin Painter. You can get a ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠copy from the publisher here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or any of the other retailers linked there.

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It turns out that the heyday of Nazi nonsense (1890 to, frankly, present) was accompanied by a flurry of scholarship by people much better positioned to understand the pointlessness of race science than their extremely indoors academic peers. Today, we look at the life of race scientist Franz Boas, whose primary distinction is that he actually looked at skull measurements and didn't really find anything concrete. We'd love to say that this man heralded the death of racist nonsense, but unfortunately we live 136+ years in the future and we know that this is absolutely not the case. Let's not get sentimental about a man who was only halfway there, but let us revel, listener, in the story of Franz Boas: the man who almost got it. It's chapter 16 of The History of White People!

Chapters:

(00:22:23) The Discussion Zone

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Our book is The History of White People by Nell Irvin Painter. You can get a ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠copy from the publisher here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or any of the other retailers linked there.

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There once lived a man named William Z. Ripley. Mister Ripley wrote a very large book which ranked all the peoples of Europe to figure out who America should reject. Mister Ripley needed to know which Whites were the Good Ones who would fold themselves properly into the American project of dominating Black and Indigenous people. He lived a long and prosperous life inside the United States, retiring in 1933 after a long and prosperous career teaching race science to tomorrow's jagoffs. We hate this man, and we hope you will join us in hating him too. It's chapter 15 of The History of White People!

Chapters:

(00:18:24) The Discussion Zone

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Our book is The History of White People by Nell Irvin Painter. You can get a ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠copy from the publisher here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or any of the other retailers linked there.

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The Civil War is a turning point in American history, beautiful listener! Did it confer freedom to the enslaved? Eh, not so much. Did it unite a fractured America? Like, I guess. Did a bunch of proto-White draftees get citizenship and then never get their war pensions? Absolutely! Did this era of alleged freedom lead to generations of eugenics and immigration restriction? You betcha! It's chapter 14 of The History of White People!

Chapters:

(00:20:46) The Discussion Zone

------

Our book is The History of White People by Nell Irvin Painter. You can get a ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠copy from the publisher here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or any of the other retailers linked there.

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Tweet⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ at your favorite hosts!

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