Episode Description

"Your kids are already grieving. The question is whether they know how."

In this episode of Grieve That Sh!t, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, tackles one of the hardest parts of loss for parents: helping children grieve while you're grieving too.

Because most parents believe their job is to protect their children from pain.

But grief doesn't work that way.

Children feel everything. They feel the tension. They feel the sadness. They feel the fear. They notice the silence. They notice the tears you hide. And when we avoid talking about grief, soften the truth, or pretend we're okay, they don't feel protected.

They feel confused.

In this powerful episode, Sharon explains why children do not need perfect answers. They need honest ones. They need to see what grief looks like. They need to learn that pain is something you move through, not something you avoid.

Sharon shares why so many parents rush to fix, distract, or protect their children from grief, and how that often comes from their own fear of facing the pain. She also shares a deeply personal story about losing her favorite aunt at sixteen years old and how being left to figure grief out alone shaped her understanding of loss.

This episode is a reminder that your children are watching.

Not your words.

Your grief.

Because whether we realize it or not, we are teaching our children how to grieve every single day.

And if we don't teach them?

They'll end up where most of us did.

Trying to figure it out alone.

What You'll Learn in This Episode

• Why children experience grief differently than adults
• The truth about trying to protect kids from pain
• Why silence creates confusion during grief
• How children learn grief by watching the adults around them
• The difference between protecting your child and interrupting their grief
• Why honesty builds trust during loss
• Common mistakes parents make when talking about death
• How your own grief work helps your children heal
• Why children need presence more than perfect answers

Questions to Sit With After Listening

• What emotions does my child's grief bring up in me?
• Am I protecting my child from pain... or protecting myself from watching it?
• What messages did I learn about grief growing up?
• How am I modeling grief for my children right now?
• What would change if I stopped pretending I was okay?

Homework for You

Take a piece of paper and write this question at the top:

"What did I learn about grief growing up?"

Then answer honestly.

What did the adults around you teach you?

Did they talk about grief?

Did they hide it?

Did they cry?

Did they tell the truth?

Because before we can teach our children how to grieve...

We have to understand what we learned about grief ourselves.

Resources + Next Steps

👉 Join The Story Room

👉 Listen to more episodes of Grieve That Sh!t

👉 Learn more at: griefdiscovery.com

Because your child does not need a perfect parent.

They need a grieving parent willing to tell the truth.

And sometimes the greatest gift we can give our children is showing them that pain is not something to fear.

It's something we learn to move through.