The Hardest Job Ever

When Purvi's boys' preschool asked for Diwali volunteers, her first answer was no. The slot was mid-morning on a workday, Dhruv was traveling, and every snack and craft would fall on her. Then she remembered how often she talks about carrying culture forward, asked the teacher one question, and walked out signed up. Starting from listener Rachel's story about joining her district's PTO board, Purvi and Karen talk about whether it's a parent's job to teach a school their culture, being called on as the only Indian kid in history class, and whether they volunteer out of joy or out of worry that nobody else will. Plus: chocolate-dipped Parle-G cookies, Karen's years-long unibrow standoff with her mom, and who gets the credit when the husband shows up on the day.

Please like, follow, subscribe, and share with a mom who is also drowning trying to push two cultures forward.

This season is brought to you in partnership with The Cumin Club. The Cumin Club makes it easy to bring authentic Indian food into busy, modern life with over 30 chef-crafted recipes rooted in the regional cuisines of India. Just add hot water for a restaurant-quality meal in minutes, from curries and lentils to rice, simmer sauces and dessert. Try The Cumin Club at (http://thecuminclub.com/) and use code HARDESTJOBEVER30 for 30% off new orders!

Before she became a mom, Purvi was sure her kids would speak fluent Gujarati. Now, with Diwali around the corner, she feels guilty. Most days she's too tired to speak it with the boys, and when her husband suggested garba this year, she said she didn't have the bandwidth. Karen doesn't feel that guilt, and wonders if she should. Purvi and Karen talk about how listener Rachel from Chicago wants to rethink Raksha Bandhan for her three kids, the Vidaai that made Karen question which traditions to keep, and whether they're passing down culture for their kids or out of fear of being the generation that loses it. Plus: the fast Purvi did as a girl to get a good husband, and why she wants her boys to do it now.

Please like, follow, subscribe, and share with a mom who can resonate.

This season is brought to you in partnership with The Cumin Club. The Cumin Club makes it easy to bring authentic Indian food into busy, modern life with over 30 chef-crafted recipes rooted in the regional cuisines of India. Just add hot water for a restaurant-quality meal in minutes, from curries and lentils to rice, simmer sauces and dessert. Try The Cumin Club at (http://thecuminclub.com/) and use code HARDESTJOBEVER30 for 30% off new orders!

Jasleen Agarwal found out she was pregnant on the flight home from teaching a production partner how to make paneer. She and her husband, Tarush, co-founded SĀCH Foods in 2019 to bring flavored paneer to American grocery shelves. By the time their daughter arrived in February 2020, Jasleen was working a full-time tech job, SĀCH had landed in Whole Foods, and COVID was weeks away. Purvi and Karen talk with her about who becomes the default parent when both careers matter equally, the postpartum anxiety she didn't have a name for the first time around, and why she still wants to be the one cooking dinner the way her mom did. Plus: why she never apologizes first, and what happens when a fight with her co-founder spills into a meeting.

Please like, follow, subscribe, and share with a mom who can resonate.

This season is brought to you in partnership with The Cumin Club. The Cumin Club makes it easy to bring authentic Indian food into busy, modern life with over 30 chef-crafted recipes rooted in the regional cuisines of India. Just add hot water for a restaurant-quality meal in minutes, from curries and lentils to rice, simmer sauces and dessert. Try The Cumin Club at (http://thecuminclub.com/) and use code HARDESTJOBEVER30 for 30% off new orders!

Purvi and Karen are back from summer break, and a lot has changed. Purvi is back to being the default parent, taking work calls from daycare bathrooms and pushing a promotion down the road again. Karen stepped away from work by choice and is trying to figure out who she is without a job title. In the Season 6 premiere, they talk about what ambition looks like when you stop giving 110%, the South Asian overachiever voice that still won't quiet down, and why neither of them can plan five years out anymore. Plus: the move Purvi can't agree on with her husband, the spreadsheet Karen made and never showed hers, and a first look at what's coming this season. 

Please like, follow, subscribe, and share with a mom who can resonate.

This season is brought to you in partnership with The Cumin Club. The Cumin Club makes it easy to bring authentic Indian food into busy, modern life with over 30 chef-crafted recipes rooted in the regional cuisines of India. Just add hot water for a restaurant-quality meal in minutes, from curries and lentils to rice, simmer sauces and dessert. Try The Cumin Club at (http://thecuminclub.com/) and use code HARDESTJOBEVER30 for 30% off new orders!

Season 5, Episode 7: It's the Season 5 finale of The Hardest Job Ever, and we're together in San Francisco taking an honest look at everything this season taught us about ambition, "balance," and what it really means to be a working mom.

From burning out and pivoting careers, to turning down a promotion, to finally learning (painfully) how to say no, this episode gets real about what it costs to be a high-achieving mom who's also expected to do it all.

In this episode:

• Why saying no feels like failure and how to do it anyway
• What changed (and what didn't) after this entire season of honest conversations
• The "ROI on your life" trap that's making ambitious moms miserable
• Why the women who felt most grounded this season weren't doing more. They were just clear on what they weren't doing

• The real cost of being the default parent when your partner's work ramps up
• Why ambition doesn't disappear after kids. It just needs a new definition

This is for every working mom who was raised to tie her worth to her career. Every mom who hustles through the day and then questions if she showed up enough. Every working parent figuring out what to let go of without feeling like they're falling apart.

Catch you next season. Like, follow, subscribe, and share this with a mom who needs to hear it.

Season 5, Ep 6: We sit down IRL in San Francisco with Sahana Carlsen, an engineering manager at a fast-growing AI company, content creator, and mom to an 18-month-old, for one of the most honest conversations we've had on the show. Sahana just started a high-intensity new job six weeks ago. She's in the office more, traveling more, and figuring it all out in real time.

We get into all of it: the "default parent" negotiation, setting boundaries without guilt, managing resentment in your marriage, and why your definition of success, not your ambition, is what actually changes after you have a baby.

In this episode:

• How Sahana negotiated who becomes the default parent before taking her new job
• The "top 5 priorities" framework she uses to say no, at work and at home
• Why she treats herself like the CEO of her household (and how to actually do it)
• The role meditation plays in managing mom guilt, anxiety, and reactive parenting
• Her honest take on ambition after kids, and why hers got stronger
• Planning for baby #2 when you're career-driven and your partner travels
• How to set work boundaries that stick, including blocking childcare on your work calendar

If you're a working mom trying to figure out how much you can take on before something breaks, this episode is for you.

Follow Sahana: @sahanaintech on Instagram

Season 5, Episode 5: What happens to your identity when your job, your title, or your career disappears, and all that's left is "mom"?

In this episode, we sit down with Avani Modi Sarkar, co-founder of Modi Toys, to talk about her journey, going from corporate marketing to wife, mom, and entrepreneur in the span of a year, building Modi Toys into a beloved South Asian children's brand, and now stepping back to sit in the in-between and figure out what's next.

We get into:

• Avani's path from corporate America to founding Modi Toys
• Losing yourself after a layoff or maternity leave
• South Asian cultural pressure to tie self-worth to output
• Mom guilt, mental load, and the myth of "doing it all"
• Drowning out the noise from parents and in-laws
• Following your curiosity when you don't know what's next

For every millennial mom, working mom, or woman in transition asking "who am I now?"

Follow the show and share with a mom in the trenches.

Season 5, Episode 4: He saved her postpartum. Now she's carrying the mental load alone. An anonymous listener wrote in with a question we couldn't stop thinking about: how do you hold both truths, that your partner showed up in your darkest moment after the baby, and isn't showing up the way you need now?

This week we sit inside the default parent trap. The version where you're keeping score in your head at 9pm, where "he'll help if I ask" still leaves you carrying everything, and where the partner who pulled you out of postpartum depression two years ago suddenly can't pick a doctor's appointment time without breaking your whole week.

Purvi confronts Dhruv after his work travel hits her breaking point, and her two-week experiment handing off the kids falls apart in 48 hours. Karen breaks down how she and Aakash redrew their mornings into actual ownership lanes, not "delegated tasks," and why "let me know what to do" is the phrase that ruins her week.

We get into default parent science (early imprinting, the consistency loop, why toddlers go to whoever regulates them fastest), the mental load nobody can see, scorekeeping and resentment, reset conversations vs. burst-of-anger confrontations, and how our South Asian moms did it, and what they sacrificed that we won't.

If you've ever felt grateful and resentful in the same breath, this one's for you. Send it to your partner. Or to a mom who feels all of this but hasn't said it out loud.

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📩 Have a story like this listener's? DM us @hardestjobever on Instagram.

It's not about finding balance. It's about holding it all.

Season 5, Episode 3: Working Mom Guilt, Childcare Attachment & When Your Child Prefers the Nanny

What happens when your childcare setup works, but emotionally, it feels harder than expected?

In this episode, we unpack working mom guilt, childcare attachment, and the complex emotions that come with raising kids while relying on a nanny, daycare, or caregiver. Why does it feel like rejection when your child prefers someone else, even when you know they’re safe and loved?

We break down the psychology behind toddler attachment vs. preference, and why this is a common experience for working mothers navigating career and motherhood balance.

Topics we cover:

• Working mom guilt and identity after having kids
• Childcare guilt: nanny, daycare, and caregiver dynamics
• When your child prefers the nanny or another caregiver
• Attachment vs. preference in toddlers (child development insights)
• Emotional triggers: feeling replaced, rejected, or not needed
• Separation anxiety (for moms and toddlers)
• Stay-at-home mom vs. working mom expectations

• South Asian motherhood and cultural pressure around parenting roles
• Building a village vs. emotional impact of shared caregiving

• Reframing what it means to be a “good mom”

This episode is for working moms, new moms, and first-time parents navigating childcare decisions, mom guilt, and emotional challenges of modern motherhood.

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Season 5, Episode 2: Looking through old photos can make you pause.
Not because you regret motherhood, but because you start wondering: Who am I now?

In this episode, we unpack a question one of our listeners asked: Do you miss the version of yourself before kids? The answer isn’t as simple as yes or no.

In this episode, we talk about:

• Why motherhood can trigger an unexpected identity shift
• Losing spontaneity and autonomy, and why that feels so strange
• Karen’s journey navigating ambition, layoffs, and returning to work as a mom
• Purvi’s early pregnancy spiral about independence, twins, and moving cities
• Why your 30s might actually be the “era of becoming”

This conversation isn’t about grieving who we used to be. It’s about figuring out who we’re becoming as moms, women, and professionals.

If you’ve ever wondered how motherhood changes your identity, ambition, or sense of self, this episode is for you.