In this episode, Nick speaks with Ryan Skinner, an entrepreneur, financial advisor, and coach. Ryan shares his journey of recovery from addiction and how it has transformed his life. They discuss the importance of spirituality, routine, and discipline in his recovery and personal growth and the importance of finding a mentor or coach to guide you on your path to self-mastery.

What to listen for:

“If you’re somebody who’s in recovery… when you have that spiritual connection, if you do something and you put that block between you and that source, it just fucks you all up.”

“Do something you can do so you can build something you love to do. You can’t just find a job you love. You have to build it.”

“What really helped me, for me, was a 12-step program… I never knew that that was the key to the kingdom of life.”

About Ryan Skinner

With a proven track record of insightful thought leadership and dynamic presentation skills, Ryan brings a unique blend of expertise and charisma that captivates audiences. His extensive experience in finances has allowed him to deeply understand the challenges and opportunities within the industry, making his presentations both relevant and impactful. Ryan’s ability to distill complex concepts into relatable anecdotes and practical takeaways ensures that attendees, regardless of their background, leave the event with a clear and enriched understanding of the subject matter.

Resources:

Check out these other episodes about addiction and recovery

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Your Friends at “The Mindset & Self-Mastery Show”

Nick McGowan (00:01.705)
Hello and welcome to the Mindset and Self Mastery show. I’m your host Nick McGowan and today on the show I have Ryan Skinner. Ryan, how you doing man?

Ryan Skinner (00:12.356)
Doing well, how you doing brother?

Nick McGowan (00:13.471)
I’m good. I’m excited for you to be here. I think we’re gonna have a really good conversation. I was saying to you before we hopped on, I think we are both very, very talkative. So this could be a long conversation, but I think there’s a lot of stuff that we’ll get into recovery, redemption, obviously entrepreneurship. There’s a lot of really good stuff we’re get into. So why don’t you kick us off? Tell us what you do for a living and what’s one thing most people don’t know about you that’s maybe a little odd or bizarre.

Ryan Skinner (00:40.814)
All right, what do I do for a living? So I’m not really sure. I guess I’m an entrepreneur. You everybody says that like it’s an exciting thing, but you and I both know that just means you don’t sleep. So I own a retirement planning business where I help people create income, which I love. I love helping folks to retire and achieve their goals. I also own basically part of another firm, which manages people’s wealth.

And I also own a coaching business and speaking. I go out and speak to other financial firms and insurance companies about, you know, motivate them, teaching them, you know, where I was and where I’m trying to get to. Because so many, you and I know so many people talk, it’s just bullshit. You know, two things, I’ll give you two things that are kind of weird because one, you know, a friend of mine is like, wow, like almost impressed by it. Like, do you hear how stupid this is? The first thing is this. I had a knee surgery four years ago.

And I went home and they me all up on meds. And I don’t take pain meds usually because you know my past and which we’ll get into. But I was taking them that night because it was a lot of pain. And I went online and I ended up buying a Rottweiler puppy which is cute and a Ferrari used. And I forgot about it. And about two nights later my ex -wife was at work and the truck pulled up and they rang my doorbell and they opened the back of the truck like what the fuck and sure enough there was a used Ferrari. And

The Rottweiler, same thing. That weekend a Rottweiler comes in my house, you know, same thing. You know, Ryan, what the? And sure enough, we had a Rottweiler puppy. The Rottweiler ended up biting a lot of people. It had to be put down, which is really hard for me. I used to drive around a Ferrari with a Rottweiler next to me. But the Ferrari I kept and the wife was gone. I got rid of that, but I kept the Ferrari. It’s pretty cool. I don’t drive much. You know, it’s one of those things you always think it’d be great to have. Truth is I kept it because I don’t know how to sell it. I’m in New England. Where do you sell it? And I’ll give you one other strange thing people don’t know.

In college I stripped. So there you go. There’s a fucked up thing.

Nick McGowan (02:30.547)
You can’t just mic drop that not say anymore. Come on now.

Ryan Skinner (02:34.966)
I was in college. I thought you didn’t want to argue. Here’s the long -witted part. Here’s how I got there. When I first was in college, there was a guy at the same gym who was a waiter at this place. just served drinks from topless to hot girls. I was like, wow, that’s pretty cool. I kept working on it. I was getting in better shape. Now I’m in it. At that point, I’m trading. I got into my business.

Nick McGowan (02:37.462)
I mean, how did you get there? Why did you do it? Why did you get out of it? What are your thoughts now?

Ryan Skinner (03:01.018)
at 18 years old, I went to college evenings, I to work 6 a to 2 p So now I’m doing that. guy says, you know, what are doing weekends? said, I was kind of shy. So why don’t you come wait here? And I’m like, I’m not doing that. One of my friends, talked me into it. I did it. I wasn’t shy anymore. Suddenly, like, you know, I started having some confidence. I was always drunk or banged up, of course. And then

Yeah, out of the blue, you know, I realized that those guys I used to go in set up and I worked from like five after it said it’s not at seven. I’d work close at midnight. I gather to those guys got there at nine thirty and left by midnight. I was like the alpha came and I at that point in my self -esteem was a lot better. At least it was more crazy. I don’t know if it was better. I think I think you have to have low self -esteem to do that for whatever reason. I ended up doing it and I did it till about a week before graduate college and I just was done.

Nick McGowan (03:42.654)
Hmm.

Ryan Skinner (03:50.756)
So I can say I stripped to put myself through college, although I didn’t pay for college without money.

Nick McGowan (03:50.773)
But you know, it’s a story that counts at that point. Like obviously there’s more details that go along with that. But I mean, there’s a lot of stuff when we think about, I mean, there are certain people that I think addiction is a big piece of this, obviously recovery and the addiction, but being able to know, like I don’t know if I want to take these narcotics, even though it’s for pain and specifically after a surgery.

Ryan Skinner (04:00.536)
a lot.

Nick McGowan (04:20.436)
but then doing something like buying something like you did. Some people will hop on Amazon Prime and you know, two, $300 later, it’s a different story than buying a dog and a used Ferrari. But it’s still the same concept, you know? So if we think about the addiction and the recovery from that, it can be really hard to say, I want to work through the pain and then not.

Ryan Skinner (04:34.788)
Yeah.

Nick McGowan (04:46.42)
and then get into a spot where you buy something like that. And that’s probably one of the lesser rough versions of what could have happened. You know, that could have been the thing that really got you rolling down that hill again. That could have been the problem. I, I, I stopped drinking about almost two years ago. and I think I drank from like base. Thanks, man. I think I drank from like, I don’t know, 12 until 38. and.

Ryan Skinner (05:07.95)
That’s great. Congratulations.

to.

Nick McGowan (05:16.419)
It has taken time to be able to be able to be around it. But at this point, like I can see bottles of alcohol, can smell it or whatever, and I have a negative feeling toward it. But it can take a lot to be able to work to and through that. But then when you’re back in that spot where you get to use narcotics or use something that would have tripped you up and pushed you down that hill before, how did you work through that? And did you get caught back in that trap again?

Ryan Skinner (05:44.666)
Not that time. I’m very lucky. I’ve had probably nine, 10 surgeries since I first got sober. the first time it pulled me back in, you know, it, it waited, it the demon, you know, and it’s, and that beast is always there and you’ll find that. hopefully, sounds like you’re doing well. And it does say in like, in the big book, it says, you know, we will become basically neutral to alcohol. I don’t care. I mean, I have alcohol. When I have some people at my house for holidays, whatever they drink, I tell them, just don’t put a needle in your arm and we’re all right. You know, but I’ll be honest with you. It’s,

Nick McGowan (05:55.891)
Mm -hmm.

Nick McGowan (06:11.302)
Yeah.

Ryan Skinner (06:14.998)
The other times after that when I wasn’t relapsed, I was doing that time or you’re out this past spring I broke my ankle. They gave me medication I only took it for one night because it was just broken. They had said it so but I’ll tell you it gets me off in fact I remember saying somebody close to me I said to her I don’t even want to use anymore. I just like I don’t want to take the rest I dumped him but like why do I feel so I fell off for a month and a half because

Nick McGowan (06:24.912)
Hmm.

Ryan Skinner (06:39.882)
If you’re a snowman or if you’re somebody who’s in recovery, not just hold on for your dear life, but if you’re actually living a life of recovery, you’ve got a connection to something called God, called the spirit of the universe, called whatever the hell you want. And when you have that spiritual connection, if you do something, you put that block between you and that source, it just fucks you all up. get the guys, I coach, I tell them, I’m not unique. I’m not going to give you anything. The key is like, you know, I’m going to help you tap into your own kingdom. That’s all my job is.

Nick McGowan (06:56.188)
Yeah.

Nick McGowan (07:04.689)
Yeah, it’s interesting when we think of kind of putting into this physical realm in a sense, the spirituality of it, like putting a block between something. Being in a house and having a roof and a block between the weather is one thing. Being able to have your own spiritual being that has a block to your creator is a totally separate thing. And if you don’t see it,

and you just are in this black cloud constantly and you don’t know that there’s that block there, that can be a huge detriment in your life. But if you do know it, you see it, and you’re self -aware of it, and then you still don’t do anything with it, you’re choosing to not do that. There are different times where I know God has straight up called something to me. Sometimes it’s been an audible voice, other times it’s like a punch in the chest. But you have that choice to be able to say, all right, I’m going to do something with it or I’m not.

I actually follow a rule of three. My grandfather gave this to me years ago. If you talk to somebody or you feel that nudge to go talk to somebody about something, you’re like, I don’t want to. It’ll come back again. And if you’re like, man, I really don’t want to, it’ll come back again. Third time, come on, man. It’s on you. Like you either do it or you don’t do it. But then you’re making that choice to not do that. Addiction can really make that choice for us if we’re not healthy enough to be able to have that stronghold.

on it or on ourselves to be able to do that. It’s an easy thing to say, but it’s absolutely not an easy thing to do at all times. There are root causes to addiction, like shame. Shame is the biggest part of all of that. How did you actually work through all of that to be able to understand, like, need to rip out the root so that you’re not just susceptible to be able to fall down that hill again?

Ryan Skinner (08:43.971)
god yeah!

Ryan Skinner (08:53.988)
So when I, you mean when I really got out of the hole, when I was really getting away from it? I’ll tell you how I did it. Pain and separation. So for me, I mean, was, it was very direct. I was on probation. I kept violating, I kept drinking. A friend of mine was a chief probation. Finally, I was involved in a fight. Somebody had stabbed me in the mouth while I was trying to break up a fight, but I was on probation. So I was involved in it I bent his arm and the knife went into him.

Nick McGowan (08:56.347)
Yeah.

Ryan Skinner (09:18.828)
It looked as though I took his knife and stabbed him. And I guess in theory, I kind of did by doing that. But you know, when you’ve been somebody’s out and pushed on the side, but because I was horrified and he wasn’t even trying to stab me, they were at each other. I was trying to split them up. I knew them both. When the cops came though, obviously they lock, you know, they cuff you because you’re involved in that. And through the grace of God, my friend didn’t cut me a pass. I walked into court when I, when I got into court that Tuesday, was, was president’s day. And I Ben, you’re not going to fuck me. You’re not going to hold me.

He looked at me and he goes, fuck you. You’ve been fucking me around your own probation. You walk into all the bars and restaurants running and buying drinks. You’re not supposed to be drinking. You’re getting fights. He you go to jail. That was the grace of God right there. And if that wasn’t here, it was. So 30 days later, they go in, they’re to let me out. They said, we’re going to plead guilty of this stuff. We’re going to let you out. And you’re to parole and blah, blah. I said, you’re on it. Can I find my lawyer? She said, why would you want to do that? said, please. And that was supposed to be a good deal.

I said, your honor, this is the first time I’ve had 30 days sober in a long time. Please give me a shot. Put me back in jail and get me treatment, please. She goes, you don’t want to go back to jail, right? Do you really? I’m just kidding, you might be making a mistake. I said, your honor, I’m asking you, please give me a chance. I’ll come back and I’ll pay it forward. She put me back. They got me treatment after for 90 years in a therapeutic community. Basically teach you how to play nice with others too. And then after that, I went to a sober house or a halfway house and all that was great.

But then when I went back into my world, it was hard. What really helped me, for me, was a 12 -step program. Having somebody take my hand, put my hand in the hand of God. And what I never knew that would do for me was I always thought that would get me sober and clean if I’m fortunate enough to get it, which I did. I never knew that that was the keys to the kingdom of the life. Everything I share when I coach somebody has been shielding me through somebody who I know in the religious world, maybe shares ideas, or my sponsor or the program. That’s all it is.

My job is putting somebody’s hand in, if they’re trying to get sober, they can’t handle it, it’s perfect. But in the business world, my job is helping somebody connect to the source, because every one of us has that capability to do greatness, right? Or at least most of us. know, most people, there’s entrepreneurs that are working for themselves, they’re in sales, they’re self -drivers, they have capability to do some big things. You know, I always name my program Cracking the Code My Business because it’s simple. If you look at a lock with four things, line up the numbers, most people can get two. People are successful, they do pretty well in like, you know, what we do.

Ryan Skinner (11:41.892)
We could probably get three and sometimes they hit for that flow state that we talk about. My job, if I’m coached somebody is if they’re, if they’re struggling to be in three, get them in three solid. And if they’re in three, they can never touch four. Get them, get them up in four here and there, you know, that fourth dimension within another level and then teach them how to stay there. And that’s the biggest thing. And that, so for me, what I learned in like getting sober and that whole process is a nail me be a different guy in every aspect of my life and it helped other guys.

I always say I was just helping people get sober. Man, it helps you professionally, helps them deal with divorce. I’m going through divorce right now. I learned how to be a single dad this way. It’s the keys to the kingdom.

Nick McGowan (12:13.073)
Mm

Nick McGowan (12:22.287)
Yeah, there’s a lot when it comes to being able to work through that really tough spot, getting out of jail, getting treatment, getting help, getting all of that. I want to make sure that we can touch on most everybody that listens to this episode. There are certain people that know exactly what you’ve gone through. They’ve gone through similar paths. There are other people that haven’t. They’ve never gotten to that point where

They’ve been put in jail or they’ve been incarcerated for any sort of amount of time. And so it’s hard to really conceptualize that and grasp all of that. But I think we can all understand that there is a jail that we have, especially when it comes to addiction. The recovery process can feel like it’s sluggish, like it’s brutal, trying to get out of it, trying to crawl out of it, but you need help, you need support. People will go through the program like you’ve talked about.

But I always like to look at what’s the symptom and not what’s the cause of it, not the symptom per se and like what’s the root instead of just directly messing with the symptoms themselves. Because if you mess around with the symptoms, you’re kind of moving stuff around on top of it and on the surface of it. So how did you actually work through the stuff that happened to you when you were younger and really the either the addictive genes that came in through parents.

or the overall trauma that you dealt with that led you to that addiction to be able to fix the root of it and not just the symptoms.

Ryan Skinner (13:52.322)
Yeah, I mean, I’m glad you asked that because, you know, people don’t realize or a lot of people don’t like to share these sort of things. But when I was a kid, you know, I had somebody who was pretty abusive to me in my life. I was lucky. He went out of my life when I was at a young age. Fast forward.

You know, had bumps and bruises. was shy and a kid. I had lot of isms, you know what mean? I had a lot shame, a lot of guilt. I felt less in no matter what I did. I walked into a room and I would always somehow feel less. Somebody was smarter, better looking, more talented. Thank you. But whatever it was, I always thought somebody had something I couldn’t do. I always felt like I was missing the party. was a day late, a buck short. My head was always in tomorrow and I was never aware my feet were.

Nick McGowan (14:18.286)
Hmm.

Ryan Skinner (14:34.052)
I was very lucky that I came across and one of my exes, she made me go to AA. I met the guy who pretty much saved my life. And I didn’t stay in touch with him right off the bat, but years later we crossed paths again. This same woman now, she had found a psychiatrist who me to see. They diagnosed me bipolar. And this guy said to me, you’re not a drug addict, you’re bipolar. And I said, no, I’m a drug addict. So I get track marks to show you my friend.

Nick McGowan (14:52.025)
Hmm.

Ryan Skinner (14:59.842)
He said, but you know, you’re bipolar and you’re self -medicating. Now do I believe that’s, I believe I’m bipolar and I’m on medication. I believe I was self -medicated, but I had way more shit, the shame, you know, my mom was a housekeeper, they did the best they could, but there were kids in school, went to, had tons of money. It just, I don’t know, I don’t know what it was. I always say I was just programmed, you know, wrong.

Nick McGowan (15:20.707)
Hmm. That’s interesting to think that you were programmed wrong. I think we all come into this planet with what we’re, what our calling is and what we’re called to do, but we get to express it the way that we feel is right. And then there are things that teach us what to do, what not to do, et cetera. I often joke with people. It’s funny. The amount of shit that you learned from your parents have more often what not to do than what to do.

Ryan Skinner (15:46.509)
Hehehehe

Nick McGowan (15:46.831)
So either way, you’re still learning, which is great. And we do that same thing throughout life, but then we start to be shaped by the systems that are around us. The friends group, the society that you’re in, even just work and the industry that you get involved in. So it’s really shocking to me how people will get out of incarceration and go directly back to that system that they were in that put them there. And it’s hard for them not to.

because that’s a familiar thing, you get back to it, you look at that. But likewise with childhood abuse or trauma or really any situation, you still want to find that familiar, but you’ve got to be able to work yourself out of that. For you to find out that you’re bipolar and that you weren’t just being an addict just to be an addict, but you were self -medicating.

That’s like levels and layers deeper to actually getting closer to be able to heal those things. So let’s talk about where you’re at now and the things that you’re doing. You’ve already said that you’re on medication, which can be a huge thing for people to be able to get to that point, even to get diagnosed with something. But to be able to actually facilitate your days in a way that’s different than what you did before that just kept you in that addictive space. What are you doing now to be able to work on yourself, to be able to make sure that you

not only get better, but that you don’t get worse and that you continue to actually evolve as the person in a healthy way.

Ryan Skinner (17:18.158)
Well, yes, people were either going backwards or forward. I don’t think many people stand still, you know, and if they do, life’s passing by. So my days are very different now. You know, some people, it’s funny, I was talking to somebody last night, said, sometimes people can just go to bed whenever they want, watch TV, wake up, out of bed, just go off to work and blah, blah. That’s not me. You know, my day starts, I roll out of bed on my knees and I pray.

Nick McGowan (17:22.271)
Mm -hmm.

Ryan Skinner (17:40.514)
Lately I haven’t been able to get on my knees, my right knee is bothering me. But I sit on the edge of my bed and lean forward. Because I think it’s a sign of humility, a of respect, something greater. And then after that I do a little journaling. I then go, sit, meditate. Usually I’ll take the dog out and meditate outside if it’s nice out or inside. From there I go hit the shower, I get ready to go to work. You know, I go to work. Throughout my day I stop and pray for clients before I meet with them. The reason being is I ask God, please allow me to be service to these clients while growing up in business.

Because you know in my 20s I was selfish if you came on board and if you had this much money I’d get you here, but I could make this much money boom Now my answer is this I’m gonna just do the best I can for you and God will take care of it As soon as I got in recovery I learned how to make God my business partner called spirit of the universe called whatever you want people used to mock me Now lot of those people are shocked because firms are paying me to go speak at their firm that they work at

Nick McGowan (18:25.303)
Hmm.

Ryan Skinner (18:33.242)
You know, we’re doing 10 to 12 times the amount of assets here, other firms do. Do we make that much more? No, we, we charge very little or none. Cause a lot of times we get paid on the back end. But I tell you, I get paid for God from God. Like every time, like I’ve never had a slow time because as soon as things slow down, I get a phone call. God, if things slow down, I go help somebody else who’s in recovery or something, somebody’s struggling or something. Next thing you know, boom, the phone rings again, I get more business. It, there’s some sort of, you know this, there’s some sort of synchronicity of life. It’s kind of like when you look at like DNA.

Nick McGowan (18:39.725)
Hmm.

Ryan Skinner (19:01.71)
It just kind of weaves itself together. When I stay out of the way and just stay on the fucking sidelines and do my leg work, get up, do my prayer and meditation, journaling, try to do at least a half hour of working out. got a little gym in my basement I built. Try to get some break of sweat, then a freezing cold shower, not a warm shower, not that bullshit. Get your workday done. Do something you enjoy doing, but don’t, know, people say do what you love to do. you know what? Do something you can do so you can build something you love to do. You can’t just find a job you love. You have to build it.

Nick McGowan (19:01.718)
Mm -hmm.

Ryan Skinner (19:30.33)
And you know what, you gotta have money in the meantime. Or like I did, live conservative. When I was rebuilt, got out of I owed 750 grand. I had no money. I was on food stamps, I was on mass health. We’ve all been at the bottom. What do we do to get out of it? For me, it’s structural routine. Discipline, discipline, discipline. The more disciplined I am, the more freedom I have. I remember writing a jail, letters from jail to my mother saying, this is the freest I’ve ever been.

Nick McGowan (19:56.311)
Yeah, there’s lot when we talk about discipline on this show, because self mastery is just a really high level of discipline. I see it as a fluid thing. It’s an evolution. You’re not just like, this is a discipline that I have for the rest of my life. Sometimes you’ll lock things in like that. But for the most part, you’re going to ebb and flow. And it’s a matter of being able to control the body in a sense and control in a way that allows you to still free flow through things. I’m glad you really touched on

Ryan Skinner (20:05.359)
Absolutely.

Nick McGowan (20:25.984)
being able to incorporate God in everything you do. I think even if you’re not religious or spiritual or you think of God as being part of what you do, I believe God’s here and working with us and people will look at it different ways, whatever. But there’s that energetics piece as a business owner. If you’re doing the right things and trying to help as best you can and doing what feels aligned for you, that business is gonna come in. The system that we’ve

Ryan Skinner (20:51.47)
Fact.

Nick McGowan (20:51.968)
grown up in and that we’ve been taught in especially as salespeople in any sort of realm. It’s almost like you’re whipped into you have to go out and keep producing and producing and producing the amount of times I’ve heard in sales. It’s just a numbers game. You get this amount of people you’ll get this amount of clothes is and you’ll this amount of money and blah blah blah blah blah. That totally negates the fact that if your energetics are off and you’re there with desperation you’re not going to get any of that shit. There are times where

Ryan Skinner (20:58.905)
Yeah.

Nick McGowan (21:21.587)
I’ve experienced where it’s like I feel the urge, like the piece of me that’s like I need to go out and do these things and I’m like, hold on, I’m not. That doesn’t actually flow and more business comes in. Something pops up. It’s like God looks at it and goes, hey, good, good job. You’re open now. Thanks for not closing yourself off. That can be a really difficult thing for people to be able to grasp because again, the systems of that and you being in the financial world, every FA that I’ve ever met for the most part.

Ryan Skinner (21:40.793)
that.

Nick McGowan (21:51.625)
has either gone through that, is recovering from that, or actively fucking in it. So how do you help other people that are going through that stuff and likewise with yourself to not feel that same urge of like, well, it’s just a numbers game. Go out, hit this many people, get this money, close this, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

Ryan Skinner (22:10.564)
So first of all, I went on all these trips from work. I’m not saying I’m bragging, but I’m saying that because I don’t go on any of them. The last thing I wanted to do was surround myself with the bullshit. The awards, they have to be on my award all the time in the mail. I don’t want it. That’s bullshit. I’d rather go sit on the sidewalk. One conference I went to where I had to go and speak at, I sat on the sidewalk with a hot dog with a homeless guy. know what I mean? Listen, lead is serve. I learned that from guys that I look up to. I didn’t come up with it. I tried to emulate these guys, and they just served. They were service. They were kind to people.

You know, you know, just because you work out to cure yourself, you’re in good shape, you wear nice clothes, you’re in it, you got money. For me, that hopefully I didn’t change me. That I still the same fans, which is funny. I still the same economic fears. I finally started releasing because the reality is there is something out there, you know, and we and we know that. So, you know, how do you go about doing what you were just saying? I mean, truth be told, when I coach guys, you tell me you’re getting a high vibration. Their eyes roll in opposite directions. Vibration, the fuck you talking about?

And see I’m listening, let go of numbers, let go like, sometimes you’ll come to my office, I’m in shorts, flip flops, and a quarter zip, you know, without a logo on it. People are like, you’re meeting clients, are we? Yeah, yeah, don’t give a fuck. I don’t need their business, I value it, but I don’t need it.

I have one priority, right? My first priority obviously is like God in the universe and spirit. I am my day like spending time reading and journaling. I put in a lot of time for me with my stuff and my personal issues, for me to do well, I mean by do well I mean stay healthy, sober, eat well, like be a dad. I I’ve put in a lot of work. Okay, I’m not an easy lift by any means. Definitely a heavy lift. But my priority is like when I my daughter three, four days a week, I wanna make that girl light up.

Like some people say, how do you, how do you work and do this? I don’t. It’s like, what do you do? What do you, about your clients? I’m like, I’ve got three other days. I’ll see them. And they’re like, yeah, but does that hurt business? I’m like, I don’t know. I don’t look.

Ryan Skinner (24:02.898)
I don’t, it’s not my business. I have an account that handles that. don’t look at any of this stuff. I know this, if I live like a ferret, I don’t go out and new cars. I’ve always bought used cars, up to the exception. Even that stupid used car. I don’t go out and buy the watches. I bought all the crap when I was younger. You know what I realized? I remember sitting in my driveway in my sports car like this, well dressed, nice watch, probably the best shape of my life muscle -wise, not physical -wise, I was probably dying.

Nick McGowan (24:12.38)
Yeah.

Ryan Skinner (24:27.734)
And I look at my house, finally built it, I paid it off, my wife and I’m just not saying this, bruh, I’m saying, and I remember saying to myself, this is it. I want to fucking die. This is all it comes down to. I remember a couple of years ago, we finally agreed to keep separating and just get divorced. It’s no more her fault than my fault, but.

Nick McGowan (24:36.68)
Mm -hmm.

Ryan Skinner (24:44.916)
She was like, she was violent. She was like physically violent. But in the end, like I was just like walking away and like, I’m sure she felt the same. But for me, I achieved every goal I wanted. I always say God gave me everything I prayed for, but I really pray for that stuff, but everything I wanted and then he laughed. People don’t realize you gotta get, when you get to where you’re supposed to be, things flow. Right, you know that. Like this is my best year. Last month was the best month of my career and I worked the least I’ve ever worked in a month by far.

Because you know what I’m doing the right things and it flows in and it’s everybody a lot of people do the right things but they don’t know to get themselves in a spot where things fall into place. I tell people the FAA is the best sales guys I coach. If I can get you to get your routine suddenly you’ll open up a little. Dial in your routine more, work less, focus more on getting healthy, emotionally, spiritually, physically. and then next thing you know you might only go have you might be working yourself eight hours a day. might have three hours left you can go to work and those three hours you’re gonna make a fortune.

Nick McGowan (25:41.425)
Yeah, I mean even think about the joke that you made in the beginning as entrepreneurs, we don’t sleep. That has typically been a thing as most entrepreneurs and I’ve had different companies, even a company I owned from 2014 to 2018 or so didn’t sleep. I thought we were all going to die. We had a team of close to 50 people. had clients that needed things. We were trying to grow the business.

And all I wanted to do was just walk off the top of my condo building. That’s all I wanted because the walls were so high. Yeah. And you’re like, this is supposed to be the top of something. This blows and being able to get to that spot and understanding this isn’t what it should look like. There’s still things to be able to work through, but you’re right. When we’re in that flow state and we’re freely moving, you will still have those concerns.

There are times where I think at different times, like where’s the finances coming in for this? What’s happening with this thing? And there’s a little bit of a nudge that’s inside of like, ooh, there can be a concern here. But really, if you’re sticking to what feels right for you, you’re doing your healing work, you’re doing the work that feels right for you, and you’re legitimately doing your best to be able to serve people, that comes back to you.

I get that some people will listen to this and for the most part our audience are open to these sort of things. Even the ones that are like, need fucking practical things because I’m really in a tough spot right now. It could be a lot to be able to say your energetics, your flow state, all that sort of stuff. But the people that get to that point where they even smell it or taste a little bit of it, they know that that’s there and that it can be there. It can be really difficult to get themselves out of that. But that’s those moments where you need to be able to work through those things.

Ryan Skinner (27:07.63)
Exactly.

Nick McGowan (27:27.474)
So with what you’re doing and how you’re helping people, what’s the sort of advice you’d give to somebody that’s on their path towards self -mastering?

Ryan Skinner (27:38.106)
Put routine instruction, put processes in place, go to somebody, find somebody, anybody. When I coach guys, say, if I’m not the right coach, find somebody else. Get somebody to guide you because somebody, let’s say, 10 miles into woods, 10 miles out, if you’ve got somebody who’s walked that 100 times, they can do it a hell of a lot quicker and they can guide you. You need systems and processes. tighter your process, the better your life.

Nick McGowan (28:00.316)
What a great way to put that man. Yeah, and I really appreciate you being able to get in into as much depth as possible and the work that you’re doing for people. Now again, I’ve met different people, no matter industries, financial advisors or whatever that are in the state where they’re just trying to pursue the money. But it looks like and sounds like you’re in the state where you’re trying to pursue the servant leadership of it all. And that’s a beautiful way to go about it, man.

I appreciate you being on with me today and before I let you go, where can people find you and where can they connect with you?

Ryan Skinner (28:35.268)
So it’s cracking the code with RyanSkinner .com and as well as Instagram. Now I’m not gonna lie to you, I don’t spend time on social media. However, if somebody reaches out, they have question, concern, they need a coach, they just need a friend, Meg lets me know right away and I jump on it because I’m a big believer in if somebody takes time to reach out, they’re asking for someone to get back to.

Nick McGowan (28:54.907)
Yeah, that’s really awesome of you to do that. And again, Ryan, thank you so much for being on with this today.

Ryan Skinner (29:02.03)
Thank you so much brother, good seeing you.