Unspoken Emotions

The Invisible Weight: Healing Parental Guilt and Implicit Memory


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In this episode, Rachel is joined by renowned somatic psychotherapist and author Tracy Whitton to explore the profound journey of nervous system healing. Tracy shares her deeply personal story of "falling apart" on the inside while maintaining a high-functioning exterior, a state many women find themselves in today. After facing consecutive life-threatening illnesses with her children and the onset of perimenopause, Tracy reached a breaking point that forced her to apply her own somatic expertise to her recovery. 

KEY TAKEAWAYS

  • Survival Mode is Exhausting but Protective: Tracy describes living in a "fawn" and "flight" response where she felt a constant sense of impending doom and hyper-vigilance, often putting on a "mask" or "suit" to function in the world while collapsing internally.

  • Implicit Memory and Guilt: Many parents carry "implicit memories"—sensations or feelings of dread not tied to a specific date—that can manifest as intense guilt or a feeling of failing their children, even when circumstances are outside their control.

  • The Body Speaks in Sensation: Healing requires moving from "wild mind" (the stressed sympathetic state) to "wise mind" (the regulated parasympathetic state) by learning to interpret the body's sensations as messages rather than threats.

  • Consistency Over Intensity: Tracy emphasizes that small, 1% shifts made daily through consistent practices like walking and meditation are more effective for long-term nervous system regulation than occasional intense efforts.

  • The Power of "Leaning In": Instead of running from or judging difficult emotions like anger or sadness, Tracy teaches the practice of "leaning in" to the discomfort and wrapping it in a sense of tenderness and care to allow it to pass.

    BEST MOMENTS

    "My body speaks in sensation, and I am listening."

    "Your body isn't failing you. It's just communicating, and we just have to get that language right."

    "I went in fighting, kicking, and screaming, and then I realized the gifts of surrender."

    "The first 100 words of text on the page... my body felt like it was on the floor... I didn't know if I could go on."

    "It's about having that wise mind... It's okay for me to feel sad about that. It's okay for me to feel anger."


    To Connect With Tracey

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    Web: www.stmt.com.au

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    HOST BIO 

    Rachel Elimelech is the warm, courageous voice behind Unspoken Emotions - a podcast that gives voice to the feelings we so often keep buried. A qualified Solicitor and Higher Court Advocate, Rachel combines professional insight with deeply personal lived experience - from surviving sexual abuse, loss, and single parenthood to rebuilding her life with quiet strength and unwavering resilience.

    Her journey from teenage single mum to respected legal professional has shaped her gift for deep connection. With empathy and authenticity, Rachel creates a safe, judgment-free space where guests are invited to speak the unspoken - grief, guilt, shame, anger, fear - and begin to let go of what no longer serves them.

    Through honest, unfiltered conversations, Unspoken Emotions explores how real people have turned pain into purpose and silence into healing. Rachel believes that healing begins the moment we speak the truth of our experiences - and that none of us should carry our emotions alone.

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    Unspoken EmotionsBy Rachel Elimelech