The burden of hiding my grief to not make others uncomfortable is large. It is lonely in my grief with everyone wanting the “old Barb” back, but that won't happen. My grief has changed me and that causes people to drift away. In this episode, I explore the social aspects of grief and the toll it’s taken on me. 

 

Key Takeaways: 

[2:17] Isolation in grief and carrying the burden 

[3:20] Message from a woman who lost her children 

[4:52] Looking for social connections that don’t judge 

[7:03] Another message from someone struggling with grief and PTSD

[8:20] The foundation: Friends of Aine and children struggling with grief 

[9:35] Trauma from childhood abuse 

[12:14] Trauma from losing my baby at 25 weeks 

[13:47] Trauma from my job loss 

[15:14] The impact from losing Molly 

[16:26] People moving on and wanting the “old me” back

[20:05] The different way people grieve 

[24:47] People drifting away in grief and the spiritual aspect 

[27:03] Being defined by the area you live in

[29:13] Having lots of friends, but being isolated 

[32:11] People don’t like me making them uncomfortable with my grief 

[36:13] Self sabotage, struggling to stick to a schedule, and filling my time  

[40:43] How the responsibilities of grief drag me down 

[42:43] Year one after Molly died being the worst and year two the fog lifted 

[43:48] Year three settling the lawsuit and validating feelings 

[45:30] “Normal” will never be the same 

[47:12] How grief is intertwined in my life 

[50:18] I want to normalize the social reality of loss and death 

 

Resources from this episode:

• The Body Keeps the Score
• The Body Keeps the Score Workbook
• Friends of Aine
• Camp Erin

 

Connect with Barb:

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