Social media is a CLUSTER-F of scrolling and passive judgement.
No matter the feedback, when someone attacks you - you're forced to own it.
To get CLEAR and confident on what you stand for.
🛑 TRUE STORY
I was recently publicly shamed on social media and accused of being in a cult.
My 'crime'?
I am passionate about restoring personal freedom and confidence in our inherent gifts—a right I believe is divinely given.
I am dedicated to challenging structures of power and control that hinder our path to wealth creation and autonomy in a nation built on principles of individual vitality and community.
As someone who has witnessed and helped others escape them from experiences, I know first-hand how HARMFUL IT IS TO MISUSE THIS WORD.
Frankly, we live in a fast moving - “commentary type of world “ with no responsibility.
We live in a JUDGE-Y McJUDY kinda world.
Our brains are instinctive to judge what doesnt look, feel, smell and talk like “you.”
It' takes time to pause between the reactions in our life that bring us back into alignment.
I have to remind myself of this daily.
It's easy to label any group of beliefs we don’t understand or agree with as a cult, but that dismisses the genuine and serious harm that true cults inflict on people."
But that doesn't make it true.
I’m fierce for LEADERSHIP as a pioneer of change that can see the next wave coming.
It requires living outside a box - even though some may say its a echo chamber.
It’s a place of the unknown, really. Most will not enter.
THIS IS SERIOUS, EFFECT US ALL - so let’s dive in.
Many people think of cults as extreme, fringe movements, far removed from their own lives.
But the truth is……
the emotional dynamics behind cults often begin in places that feel safe and loving— consciousness collectives, spiritual circles, etc.
Understanding these patterns can help you recognize manipulative communities before you find yourself entangled.
I do not take the word “cult” lightly.
We’ve all subconsciously been involved at some layer, unconsciously.
It Starts with Community, Not Cults
No one ever sets out to join a “cult.”
What people join are welcoming, like-minded communities that offer connection, support, and meaning.
Cult leaders know this and create environments that initially feel nurturing and inclusive.
Only later do subtle layers of control, manipulation, and "craziness" emerge—once trust and loyalty are firmly established.
Wounded Leaders and Externalized Healing
At the heart of every cult is a leader seeking to heal deep personal wounds—painful places like feeling unloved, unimportant, or powerless.
Instead of working through this process internally, these leaders try to mend themselves by external means: inducing others to supply validation, loyalty, and praise.
They demand that their followers provide what they cannot give themselves.
Common wounds that drive cult leaders include:
* "No one will hurt me again."
* "No one will leave me again."
* "I will never be unimportant again."
The cravings to feel special, seen, and in control are not inherently wrong—everyone wishes for these things.
But when leaders demand their community fix these feelings for them, the results can be toxic.
Hierarchy Disguised as Care
Every cult is structured as a hierarchy, usually with the leader as the central, "exceptional" authority.
On the surface, these groups present as communities of care.
In reality, the longer a person stays, the more their individuality erodes.
Thoughts, feelings, and even bodies become "communal property," existing to serve the needs and wounds of the leader.
This word also highlights the risk of spiritual bypass, dogma, and hierarchy masquerading as connection.
Through the lens of power structures:
* Power Over: Cults often serve those who wield authority—leaders demanding loyalty, manipulating belief, enforcing hierarchy, and controlling behavior under the guise of care or protection.
* Power Under: In the cult's shadow, followers relinquish autonomy, seeking safety or identity by giving away choice—sometimes from wounds of isolation or spiritual hunger for meaning, sometimes from fear.
* Power With: At their most benevolent, cults can foster communal intimacy, shared rituals, equanimous participation, and the weaving of collective experience—bridging difference to co-create meaning.
* Power Within: Rarely, cults incubate inner sovereignty—supporting each individual’s journey inward rather than requiring uniformity, cultivating discernment and authentic spiritual gnosis.
Ultimately, the word “cult” calls our attention to the razor’s edge between devotion and dogma, belonging and bondage, shared ritual and lost sovereignty.
Recognizing Cultic Leadership Patterns
There are key signs to watch for in group dynamics:
* Leaders who see themselves as fundamentally superior.
* Need for the leader (or members) to receive constant agreement, affirmation, or praise.
* Leaders fear being seen as they truly are, hiding behind spiritual or social performance.
* Obedience or loyalty is demanded, even when it causes harm.
* Many leaders shift from caring to controlling if their authority is questioned or someone outshines them.
Gendered Expressions of Wounded Leadership
Cultic dynamics can express themselves differently depending on the leader’s wounds and background:
* Female-led Groups:
Begin with the promise of emotional intimacy, safety, or empowerment (the “sacred mother,” “goddess,” or “girlboss”). Exclusion, social pressure, gossip, and infighting soon emerge, especially if someone challenges or surpasses the leader.
* Male-led Groups:
Rooted in providing structure, discipline, or “tough love.” These leaders position themselves as prophets, kings, or conscious embodiments of masculine energy. They may shame weakness, demand worship, or focus on sexual conquest and power plays.
* Both may leverage “us versus them” narratives, encourage self-sacrifice, or redirect their group’s mission to suit their shifting needs, sometimes resulting in harmful cycles of service, dependency, and emotional abuse.
The Anatomy of Manipulation
A few common tactics used:
* Outsourcing healing: Making members responsible for the leader’s self-worth.
* Spiritual exceptionalism: Claiming unique access to truth, divinity, or higher knowledge that others lack.
* Suppression of dissent: Shunning, gossip, or emotional punishment for those who question, disagree, or assert boundaries.
* "Service as control": Encouraging extreme self-sacrifice from members while the leader accumulates benefits or power.
* Blurring boundaries: Sexual, financial, and emotional, often justified as part of the healing or awakening process.
Trust Your Intuition and Autonomy
The most reliable warning sign is your own sense of unease. If something feels "off," it probably is. Beware anyone who claims to possess special truth about your life or discourages your independent thought.
Pay attention to dynamics that erode your individuality or pressure you to ignore your instincts.
Every cult claims the leader is uniquely gifted or divinely connected—but so is everyone.
Healthy mentors will encourage personal empowerment, not dependency or hierarchy.
Breaking Free From Cults
Cults thrive on the obedience of their followers, not the benevolence of their leaders. The most effective way to protect yourself is through self-awareness.
Recognize the signs:
* A group that demands unquestioning loyalty
* Pressure to give up your personal boundaries or intuition
If you encounter these patterns, step away.
rust your gut, seek support, and prioritize your safety.
Remember, communities should nourish, not control.
When faced with great disappointment, family pressure, loss, grief, and so forth, we are all at risk of taking in the candy.
Every person possesses their own sacred connection to truth and meaning.
No one is more special or worthy than you.
KEY TAKEAWAYS FOR YOU ( to remember when this drops into your reality):
Every comment forces us to ask , "Am I willing to stand up for what I believe in?"
Most days that's Yes. Some days, or for some topics, it's not.
Either way, it teaches you something about where I want to put my flag in the sand.
The criticism has personally sharpened my point of view based on education, not a position.
When someone attacks -you're forced to refine and get clearer on what you actually stand for.
I've discovered blind spots I never knew existed.
Perspectives I hadn't considered.
Ways to improve my message that I would have missed without the pushback.
But the biggest lesson?
In high stakes time, I don't need anyone's validation. I know my heart.
The people who get it, get it.
The people who don't... they're not in the same thread of life-changing action anyway.
This realization and the self-work that follows EVERY TIME, is worth every uncomfortable comment.
So if you've received any negativity online, I see you.
Hope that helps.
IN CONCLUSION
Be encouraged.
Enter a potent and timely inquiry:
* How do we release the conditioning of the old epoch?
* How do we embrace the liminal transition into the unknown?
* How do we facilitate the discovery, ripening, and liberation of the new?
I love you, and support each and every one of you.
xo Kassandra
An Invitation
If you’re ready for a guided immersion to release unconscious contracts and reclaim spiritual sovereignty, I’ve created an experience called the Light Between Oracle Journey.
Learn more HERE!
May your path be lit from within.
PS: This is a key element of how I support clients.
Feel free to reach out for a akashic reading, so we can take the good - including the lessons and tuck it back into your heart with incredible new insights and higher levels of intuition.
Get full access to The Light Between at thelightbetween.substack.com/subscribe
