• Humility = Strength. Ego is the enemy, and getting ourselves out of our own way is the David/Yehuda way to incredible success/Kingship. When we uphold the image of our successful self, we can take the high road of Yosef, but sometimes the best and most powerful path forward is to admit that we are in fact powerless (this expression of powerlessness is the essence of prayer, and king David says of himself “I am prayer”). With no skin in the game we are able to humbly submit before Hashem and allow Him to lead us to great success that only He knows us to be capable of. Millions have found strength and powerful inspiration from the various twelve step programs. Step # 3, which is the crux of the program reads as follows: “Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of G-d…” There’s incredible power in the raw honest living that comes with genuine ego negation. 
• The interplay between resilience and excellence
• Yehuda is crowned King by Yaakov at the end, but that is only after first failing to fully save Yosef, saving his life, but sent away by the brothers for failing to immediately save Yosef in such a way that would have avoided the rift in the Jewish people which is only healed by Mashiach, then personal and familial failure with Tamar, and then the crowning achievement of his admission, which paves the way for his taking full responsibility for Binyamin, and his face-off and discovery of Yosef. 
• Yehuda and Tamar: Admitting weakness as a form of strength (Yosef, who represents strength, only emerges after Yehuda admits to his role with Tamar). 
• Yaakov entrusts Benjamin with Yehuda and not Rueven: Responsibility as the foundation for leadership.. What makes Judah trustworthy is that he submits his entire being under that responsibility, he becomes the vessel to succeed in the mission he’s entrusted with because he negates himself so powerfully. Yaakov can’t bring himself to trust Reuven with the dangerous and consequential mission, as he is worried that Reuven will mix himself into the picture, and fail to bring his entire self to bear on the problems that the Egyptians will surely throw their way. Under fire, fears of failure, even legitimate ones, will hinder one's ability to focus everything they’ve got, and under fire you’d better have access to all your strength and focus.
• Yehuda, with no self in the picture, is able to decide exactly when to push Yaakov to part with Binyamin. He isn’t rash. He has no need to act if it won’t be 100% useful, and so he waits, patiently, for the perfect opportunity, and he gets one when the food supplies run dry. 

• Yosef is being led by the hand to his destiny. His descent to Egypt is the catalyst for the Jewish nation being exiled there, surviving spiritually, and ultimately emerging as a nation, and it all begins with Yosef’s descent. This story is so much bigger than him! And Yosef knows this, else, he wouldn’t survive the loneliness and suffering. He knows there’s a big picture. And yet, he also focuses 100% on his small picture – the one in front of him today. Being the most useful servant of the depraved Potifar. Why? Because he knows that this small picture of today will build his own story, and ultimately the story of the Divine plan. How they exactly connect isn’t his business at the moment, but he knows with perfect faith that they connect.
• The meeting point between free-will and Divine providence.
• The above idea leads us to a deeper understanding of the serenity prayer. We don’t merely accept that which we can’t control as something that is not worth focusing on, because, hey, there’s nothing we can do about it anyways, rather, we accept the inevitable as part of our place in the Divine plan that is way bigger than we are. And then we get to work on the aspects that are within our control, and therefore our responsibility. Never forgetting that there is a bigger picture as well.

YOU Write the Script of Your Life.

We discuss how staying above your circumstances, by being rooted above your circumstances. That way you can *choose* to define your reality, and not let reality dictate to you what your life is.

We return to the life of biblical Joseph. The great commentator, Malbim, writes that Yosef acted based on the needs of the situation, not his own personal preferences. He treated those who were socially needier than he was with compassion, while he treated his equals with strength. This is something that was misunderstood by his brothers.

From Joseph we learn that focused Action = success. Marry the potential to the proper area of actualization and stick with it. Success is not a product of random chance! With focused efforts, we marry our potential to its soulmate –the fertile grounds of actualization.  

We must see our circumstances as the setting for focused action that will build our reality --today is only a springboard for tomorrow.. 

Having a growth mindset isn't only about one’s skill set and strengths, but in truth it's really a global idea. How do you see the world? 

We get into how being able to choose, and being able to focus action to build the future, tie together to be one concept. Today things are only the way they look because you haven't brought your free-will to bear yet.   

Interestingly, as we’ve mentioned twice, this futuristic view actually makes it easier to accept circumstances as they are today, and not rebel against the will of God in giving us our personal package of reality. Joseph accepts his reality 100% and then he gets to work, seeing where this reality will take him. Todays reality is just a stage, and it setup comes from above; there’s nothing I can do about changing things as they are NOW, so why bother?

It's inspiring to follow Joseph down to Egypt and watch as he finds success in all circumstances via complete focus on the present. Hashem is creating my reality. It is exactly as it should be, so focus 100%.

Despite being ‘out of a job’ --Potifar purchased Joseph for immoral purposes, but was struck by a impotency--, Joseph focuses on the task at hand, and becomes chief of staff -- he gives everything his best effort and reaps the rewards.

Joseph realizes the power of getting to work on the reality right in front of you. There’s no reason to search for opportunity. The opportunity in front of us is where we must start. If we begin, the rest will follow.

In episode #2 we discussed how to balance ambition and acceptance.

Accept the reality of today, including the things you don’t love, and by accepting them, you keep them from overwhelming your entire worldview, which in turn allows you to move forward. Acceptant mindfulness has two components: One, the embrace of what there is to love in life, and two, the acceptance of the difficult and painful.

We learned how Joseph was a master of this craft, and how he helped keep things straight for his mother, at the same time, he expanded his fathers mission. We have learned of Joseph as a youngster. We saw what he meant to his parents and got to peek at his potential. But now is the time to see this great tzadik emerge. What happens to us when we leave the cute childhood behind and try to make our dreams come true in the ‘real’ world? How do our childish dreams translate into actionable goals?

The Start of Dreams: 

Step one: be present. Being present to the moment gives you the peace of mind to sense the quiet voice of inner power and potential. It is only through an honest, realistic view of our current standing that we can hope and yearn for more. Otherwise our dreams are completely non-realistic. Dreams shouldn’t contradict reality, they should expand reality. 

Now we can begin to dream, not as a total fantasy but a dream of expressing our truest essence. 

Joseph was a dreamer, so are many, the difference is that his dream of greatness and leadership came to fruition. His dreams are prophetic, yet still require time and process to become actualized. Joseph’s brutally honest appraisal and acceptance of reality led him to a deep, faith-based sense of where he was at the moment and where he needed to go -- this being the basis of true dreams. This then allowed him to dream, to see well beyond the horizon of his present circumstances. In turn, it gave him the courage to face his most trying moments. Because he wasn’t limited by that moment, he saw way beyond it to a better tomorrow. 

What are dreams?

Dreams and imagination work through imagery, the polar opposite of purely abstract intellectualization (Moreh Nevuchim 2:73). On a more basic level, thinking with images only, is symptomatic of being enmeshed in the physical world. But Yosef is able to show that even here on this earthly land of dreams, if the earthly is fully aligned with the spiritual, there is pure, unadulterated, spiritual truth. Dreams are imaginative, the furthest possible from reality, and yet for Yosef, dreams represent the truth, and he is able to carry the emes to the farthest places, most distant from the Source –Hashem.  

Kabalistically, Yosef represents the attribute of Yesod, which connects heaven and earth. Yosef the dreamer stands at the border of freewill/malchut and divine knowledge/higher realms: Creativity Vs. Structure. Acceptance Vs. ‘pushing forward’. This is the tightrope that Joseph walks.

Yosef has the potential for perfect alignment, he can realize the Will of Hashem by his own self development without there be any contradiction between his will and that of his Creator. His free will and the realm beyond it meet in his dreams. He can realize the deepest Will that originates from far beyond self, with the daily building blocks of exercising his own power.   

What it has to do with us.

Rav Tzadok Hakohen writes that we each have a dream, a secret yearning to be a king or queen. This isn’t a result of visiting Buckingham, but an expression of a yearning that has roots deep within our psyche. You see, our soul, our deeper self, is rooted beyond the superficial reality.

The dreamer faces two major challenges. One, uncovering our inner essence which is deeply veiled by the busyness of life, and muffled by the incessant chatter of the ego. Two, even when we...

Who was Joseph? Paradigm of discipline and focus? Starry eyed dreamer? Brilliant visionary? 

Joseph’s personality develops from day one, and can be derived from his very name. “And she (Rachel) called his name Joseph (yosef, to add) for G-d has gathered (asaf)  my shame.” Joseph, it turns out, relates both to adding and to gathering. He defines, gathers, directs, ensures that nothing gets lost, and then with every ounce of good conserved and every bit of bad contained, Joseph is ready to add.

Joseph’s name contains two fundamental truths: One, for goodness to thrive, evil must be kept at bay. Sure, it’d be great to vanquish all negativity, put all evildoers behind bars, and get on with our work. But that has little to do with reality. Instead, evil should be defined, understood, and promptly banished i.e., limited as much as possible; it has its powers, but the key question is: do we add to its strength? Do we give it larger-than-life powers? Joseph understood the power of limiting evil to be no more than it is on its own. “You want to mess with G-d’s world? You won’t get any attention or help from me,” says Joseph. 

As we travel through life, we will face challenges. A key question we must ask ourselves is, how much of this is true in objective reality, and how  much have I contributed to the problem by treating the issue as something greater than it truly is? Sure, it may be a problem, but is it really all encompassing? Joseph teaches us to allow our troubles to occupy the real estate they actually occupy and not an extra inch. 

The second lesson is that abundance, expansive blessing, and enduring greatness don’t grow out of thin air. There’s no magic potion, formula, program, book, or weekend retreat that can create success for you. Success and greatness are about growth. Growth, by definition, requires a starting point, a seed. You are the seed of your own future greatness. Only by discovering your roots, and working to conserve and focus the power within, can you discover that, in fact, there are no limits or borders to what you can achieve. The abundance of Joseph arises only from the focus of asaf. 

What’s remarkable is that all this begins before Joseph has made a single choice. It all lies in his name, in his inner potential. While Joseph’s identity and strength were unique, there’s nothing unique about this story. Every human being has an incredible and absolutely unique potential for greatness. Can we reconstruct Joseph’s path to the throne, and recreate it in our own lives? The answer, I believe, is a resounding yes! 

The very first thing we must do is find our inner sanctuary and guard it for all we are worth. Maybe you have a particular interest in one act of service or another? Perhaps there’s a talent waiting to be discovered that will empower you as an individual, and allow you to find your voice for the betterment of the world around you? Maybe there’s an aspect or book of ancient Torah wisdom that fascinates you?

The key idea is that the starting point is in front of you. You can only begin from the present, so be mindful of where you are now. If you can ensure this tiny but most vital part of your personality remains pure, unsullied by anger, unharmed by critics, and at once strong and vulnerable, you have your seed. Then you must get to work. The seed isn’t to be protected for eternity, it is there to grow into something formidable.

But the real world doesn’t allow for purity! True, but the game of life isn’t all or nothing. Even one droplet will be enough to get you going. The soul is all encompassing. It is one. By touching a part you’ve touched the whole. If, for only one moment, you manage to hear the voice of your soul, you will have your marching orders.

That is...

The gift of life is the gift of opportunity. The choice is ours. Should we aim for greatness, or satisfy ourselves with mediocrity? 

Choosing to pursue greatness is only the beginning. From the start, distractions and frustration litter the road before us. How we deal with these impediments will define the type of life we build. How we respond to this question isn’t a personal matter, because the person we become for ourselves is the person we become for others. Successful leadership is simply successful living, perhaps with bigger and broader stakes. The aim of this (podcast) is to showcase two approaches to success – on a personal and leadership level.

There are two pathways up the mountain: the path of focused strength, and the path of resilience. The former is the path of Yosef and the latter is the path of Yehuda and his descendant King David.

Yosef was a tzadik; the paradigm of moral strength, he always managed to turn dust to gold. As a young slave, recently torn from his family, he does well enough to become head of household for an important court official.

Handsome, uber successful, and lonesome at the age of seventeen, he had the inner strength and focus to resist the daily advances of his master’s wife. 

Yosef teaches us to set our moral compass early in life, and never waver. He knew where he wanted to go, and nothing could distract him.

Yosef was a dreamer, he had ambitions, and he set out to conquer them. Calm and composed, he had an intuitive sense of who he was, and the faith to know that he would eventually arrive. Failure was simply not in Yosef’s lexicon. 

Yehuda and David, on the other hand, were all about resiliency. While Yosef taught us how to avoid failure, Yehuda and David taught us how to succeed despite and indeed because of failure. 

Yehuda was seduced by Tamar. Compounding the problem was the very difficult choice he faced: admit to it, or see an innocent woman killed. He admits to his lapse, and from this embarrassing union Mashiach is born.

Resiliency isn't about recovery but about transformation. Yehuda uses a powerful formula of humility, faith and hope to bounce back from failure stronger than ever.

There are the things we excel at. There are times and situations that bring out the best in us. We must grab those opportunities and soar. But there are also moments that test us, and sometimes we fail. 

Yosef and Yehuda, resilience and excellence, aren’t mutually exclusive. With Yosef as our guide, we discover our strengths and learn to focus our efforts where they matter most. But what happens when we fall - and if we travel the road to greatness, we will falter. It is inevitable. But - does that spell the end?  Do we stop dreaming, stop trying? Yehuda and David teach us to dust ourselves off, get up, and get back to work. We will prevail because it TOO, is inevitable. One day in the future, we’ll look back at this moment, not as our greatest failure, but as the catalyst for our greatest success.

Let’s see how these two approaches play out in some common scenarios. 

Scenario number one: A corporation achieves major success, but confidence quickly gives way to arrogance, and high standards to a stifling bureaucracy.

Leadership has forgotten that the past should inform, but not define, the future.

The great poet John Keats advised that we acquire 'Negative Capability'. According to Keats we need to fight the need for control. Our ego loves a nice clean explanation. It delights in saying, “I got this.” Instead, we should suspend our judgment and humbly embrace uncertainty.

With humility, we sneak a peek at that which is beyond us. It puzzles us; it annoys us; it stretches us beyond our comfort zone. It challenges us to rethink our paradigms. Our deeply held beliefs, indeed our entire world, comes under careful...

A Tale of Two Kings

Death and The True Meaning of Life.

After 12 chapters of describing the futility of life, Kohelet closes with a discussion of death.

But once again, the lesson is about the greatness of purposeful living. Life is eternal. It is the empty pursuit of pleasure and power that is empty.

Solomon's begs us to consider the following two extremes: The successful person who knows they have something unique to contribute and they go ahead and work it, until at last, success --Proactivity at its best. The other fellow says, why work if I can just talk. But eventually, feeling the emptiness of a life of idle chatter, the lazy fool, now broke, can do no better than blame everyone around him for his woes.