The Living Experiment: Rethink Your Choices. Reclaim Your Life.

This week on The Living Experiment, we're talking about "mansplaining" — that dynamic where men sometimes explain things to women in condescending, clueless, or less-than-respectful ways.

Perhaps a man persists in explaining something that a woman already knows. Perhaps he talks over her attempts to express her own point of view. Or perhaps he holds forth in some way that generally does not honor his listener as an equal.

Mansplaining has become a popular term and a hot topic over the past few years, and because it's such an common source of stress and strife in our world, we also see it as an important and under-recognized health issue.

So in this episode, we talk about the origins of the word "mansplaining." We share our personal experiences with it and discuss how increasing our awareness of it can help men and women communicate in more constructive, mutually satisfying ways.

Finally, we serve up some experiments to help you notice how mansplaining might be showing up in your life — and what you can do about it.

• Dallas's eye-opening (and sometimes disturbing) journey through Rebecca Solnit's book, Men Explain Things to Me (4:00)
• Defining the term "mansplaining" — via examples and Solnit's own words (9:00)
• How the mansplaining dynamic can create a chronic, internalized stress that may manifest as physical illness (11:10)
• Pilar's experiences with mansplaining at work (12:55) and in a dating relationship (15:25)
• The ways that women's pent-up frustrations may suddenly surface, and why those eruptions tend to have less-than-healthy outcomes (18:15)
• How mansplaining was modeled and adopted in Dallas's family (20:10)
• The devaluing of women's experience and knowledge, by both the man doing the mansplaining and the woman being mansplained to (21:25)
• A recent mansplaining incident in Pilar's current relationship (23:30)
• Practical solutions for men and women, beginning with awareness (26:10)
• Pilar's perspective shift transitioning from a women's college to a workplace where men ran the show (26:55)
• Dallas's key takeaways from his new awareness of mansplaining — the consequences of devaluing the unique and critical perspective of half of the human race (28:35)
• The intersection of three themes from episodes of The Living Experiment — shame, scarcity mentality, and mansplaining (31:00)
• The value of asking "interested" vs. merely "interesting" questions, and how this can help produce richer, more rewarding conversations (32:45)
• The physical reactions women may experience in response to mansplaining scenarios (35:45)
• In-depth analysis of the two options for responding to mansplaining — suck it up or intervene (36:30)
• When responses to mansplaining lead to lose-lose scenarios (38:05)
• Finding context for the frustration (39:10)
• Dallas's call to men to take responsibility and change the dynamic (41:15)
• The importance of evaluating the stress and depleted pleasure caused by mansplaining, at work and at home, whether you're a man or a woman (42:15)
• Suggested experiments for the week (43:55)

Dallas suggests:

1) For men: Pay attention to how you speak to women, notice when you're mansplaining, and own up to it in the moment it happens.

• The woman may already be frustrated, and you may have already damaged your conversation and relationship. Call yourself out and take responsibility.
• Behavior change is important, but even more powerful is stopping and acknowledging the behavior in the moment because it defuses harm and allows the tone of the conversation to reset.

2) For women on the receiving end of mansplaining, intervene with the man in a constructive way.

• Share how you are feeling, raise the issue, and indicate that you want to advance the conversation together in a mutually respectful way.
• If you notice anger rising, ask whether it's commensurate with the situation or a disproportionate response driven by your personal history.
• Recognize that blasting the man doesn't help solve the problem of the millennia behind you. He may have no idea that what he's doing is being received by you as disrespectful; he may have been trying to impress you with his knowledge or share something he thought you'd find helpful and interesting.

Pilar suggests:

1) Read Rebecca Solnit's thought-provoking essay, "Men Explain Things to Me", to get a sense of why this issue matters so much, and carries so much social, emotional and political charge.

2) Start noticing mansplaining on television, the radio, or wherever you overhear conversations.

• Witnessing it occurring around you allows you to observe it more objectively and consider how you might handle it if you were to find yourself in a comparable situation.
• Seeing examples through the lens of history (watching period pieces, on Mad Men, etc.) can help make you more aware of when it's happening in your own midst.

Get full show notes and resources at http://livingexperiment.com/mansplaining/

We are big fans of coffee. We dig its flavor, its aroma, its health benefits, its feel-good buzz. We also know it's easy to overdo, particularly when we're rushed, stressed and depleted — which is precisely when all that caffeine is most apt to do us biochemical harm. In this week's episode of The Living Experiment, we look at both the upsides and downsides of coffee, explaining how it affects both your body and brain from the moment you take a sip. We suggest ways to fine tune your coffee selection and habits, and offer our thoughts on the pros and cons of the burgeoning "butter coffee" trend. Finally, we present some experiments to help you make more conscious coffee decisions in your own life.

• How caffeine is metabolized by your body (and a tip for enhancing the duration of its effects) (5:05)
• Why coffee has the title of "single greatest source of antioxidants in the American diet" (7:55)
• Research that links coffee with reduced risk (or delayed onset) of Alzheimer's disease and type-2 diabetes (9:50)
• How genetics affect your caffeine metabolism rate, and implications for how beneficial or harmful coffee may be for you (11:00)
• The relationship between low-grade, chronic stress and heart palpitations or "jitters" while drinking coffee (12:35)
• From the Experience Life magazine article, "This is Your Body on Caffeine" — a timeline of what happens in your body over the 12 hours after you drink coffee (13:40)
• First 10 minutes: Stimulation and alertness (14:30)
• 30-45 minutes later: Peak energizing effects, slowing ability to absorb dopamine, and increased urge to go to the bathroom (15:20)
• 1-5 hours later: Release of adrenaline, increasing heart rate and blood pressure, and break down of caffeine by the liver (16:20)
• Caffeine intake and trouble getting to sleep (18:15)
• The interaction between stress, coffee, and appetite (21:10)
• How oral contraceptives and smoking affect your body's ability to process caffeine (22:50)
• After 12 hours: Withdrawal and headaches that pass within a few hours if you drink enough water (25:05)
• The butter-coffee and "Bulletproof" trend: What it is, the theory behind its potential benefits, including impacts on cognitive performance, blood sugar, and energy levels (25:30)
• Why subbing coffee for food is not a sustainable weight-loss or health-improvement solution (28:00)
• How a strategic whole foods eating plan can help you achieve better results (34:45)
• Decaf — choose organic or skip it entirely (37:20)
• Social and environmental issues around coffee and whether fair trade, organic purchases make a difference (38:30)
• Challenging our current crazy coffee culture — jumbo drinks with five shots of espresso and several pumps of artificial flavors and sugar syrups or artificial sweeteners added to the mix (39:50)
• The high cost of using coffee to power sleep deprivation, or to overcome our natural ultradian rhythms (42:15)
• If you're not already drinking coffee, should you start? (43:40)
• Regulating your caffeine intake to manage anxiety and avoid panic attacks (44:45)
• Suggested experiments for the week (47:25)

Dallas suggests:

Take a three-week break from coffee and all caffeine to assess your relationship with it and its effect on you.

• Habitually consuming caffeine desensitizes you to its effects.
• For athletes looking for a performance boost, try reintroducing caffeine shortly before competition to get its full cognitive and physiological performance-enhancing effects.
• Evaluate how obligated you are to add a sweetener or fat source to your coffee. If you don't like it without those additives, either you aren't drinking good coffee, it's not prepared well, or you don't actually like coffee as much as you like your coffee condiments.

Pilar suggests:

1) The next time you go into a coffee shop, order a "small," not a grandé, venti or super-jumbo-big-gulp.

• Put your attention on the experience of consciously tasting and savoring that small-size cup (and notice how few people order a "small" anything anymore).
• Avoid adulterating your coffee with all sorts of added flavors (caramel shots, etc.).
• If you like having "cream" in your coffee, have real cream (preferably heavy vs. half-and-half); pass on the fat-free, skim or low-fat milk, and bypass the weird chemical substitutes.
• You probably won't see heavy cream as an option unless you ask; many places stock it for whipping cream, and don't put it out for customer use unless requested.

2) Experiment with different ratios of cream to coffee.

• Try adding a little more fat than you normally would, and then cutting back on sugar (if you normally add it). See how it impacts your enjoyment and satiety.
• Choose better coffee — better sourced, better roasted or better prepared. It may reduce your desire to add sweeteners and flavors.

Get full episode notes and links at http://livingexperiment.com/coffee/

Every season has its gifts, but we live in a culture that prefers to celebrate the bright, "go-go" energy of summer. Without the haven of a winter recovery cycle to replenish us, though, we get depleted, overstimulated, and overwhelmed. So in this week's episode of The Living Experiment, we talk about the important and under-appreciated aspects of the winter season. We explain how you can observe its traditions by strategically adjusting your mindset, sleep schedule, food, fitness activity, and more. Drawing on ancient wisdom and modern-day science, we suggest some experiments to help you make the most of winter in your own world.

• An overview of where winter fits into Chinese Five-Element Theory – associating everything in nature and our lives with a season and element, each with its own implications (6:00)
• Fall associations: Metal (element), grief (emotion), and the experience of emptiness – a big, metal bowl with receptive space (7:00)
• Winter: Water (element); fear (emotion); the experience of introspection, dreaming, creativity, and exploration — many "what if?" possibilities filling the empty bowl (7:20)
• Spring: Wood (element); anger (emotion); the experience of clear, conscious choice and directed energy — a bamboo shoot emerging straight from the water (8:30)
• Summer: Fire (element); joy (emotion); the experience of flourishing, sharing the bounty, including everyone in the celebration — the blossoming of the bamboo shoot in a beautiful display of plenty (9:40)
• Change of season: Earth (contains all the elements), empathy (emotion), the experience of sharing from a place of surplus – redistributing resources, then returning back to emptiness with a bigger metal bowl, stronger structure, even greater possibility (10:00)
• The "cult of the light" — our imbalanced cultural celebration of the bright, energetic, and productive (masculine "yang" energy) at the cost of the equally-important quiet, slower, introspective, restorative aspects of life (feminine "yin" energy) (11:05)
• How ignoring the energetic downshift from summer into winter leaves us depleted and resentful, with nothing to give in our relationships (13:35)
• Your body's clear signals and the subtle, systemic maladies that indicate you're suffering from a lack of seasonal replenishment and restoration (15:15)
• An introduction to Dallas's seasonal model for health – three key components of sleep, food, and movement (16:35)
• The pitfalls of using stimulating screen time to ignore the changing light/dark cycle in winter, which is nature's nudge for you to become introspective and get more sleep (17:00)
• Life-giving activities for the winter, including the Danish concept of hygge that encourages intimacy with yourself and other people (19:30)
• Summer movement vs. winter movement – seasonally-harmonious fitness activities (24:00)
• How giving yourself a cardio break in winter can actually make you healthier (26:40)
• Thinking about winter exercise routines as a fitness foundation for spring and summer (28:00)
• Refraining from "should-ing on yourself" – why saying "could" instead of "should" is more empowering (32:15)
• High-intensity interval training: Short, hard anaerobic conditioning suggestions for the winter – outdoors or indoors – with appropriate work-to-rest ratios (34:20)
• Hearty food ideas for winter using locally- and seasonally-available sources, including high-quality animal proteins and fats; robust, durable, starchy root vegetables; and sturdy, leafy greens (36:45)
• Breakfast and the "year-round smoothie conundrum" – replacing cold morning smoothies with hot, healthy, hearty whole foods (40:00)
• Slow cookers (the perfect winter kitchen appliance) and soups and stews (the perfect winter meal) (42:00)
• Debunking myths about dietary fat and why it's OK (and healthy) to eat fat in moderation and without heavy carbohydrates — particularly in winter (45:00)
• An explanation of dietary cholesterol vs. serum cholesterol and why consuming eggs and meat isn't the primary driver of cholesterol troubles (47:15)
• The synergy of sleep, movement, and food – increased rest + strength and power exercises + a diet of more meat, fat, and starchy vegetables = greater winter health (49:50)
• Suggested experiments for the week (53:50)

Dallas suggests:

Progressively adjust your bedtime to get more winter sleep.

• Starting in November, go to bed a half an hour earlier with each successive month, continuing with this strategy until spring.
• Resist the urge to maintain your summer sleep schedule, which will likely net you hours less sleep than your body wants and needs.

Pilar suggests:

1) Add more seasonal vegetables to your shopping list.

• Choices include broccoli, cauliflower, Brussels sprouts, turnips, beets, and rutabagas; dark, leafy greens like kale and chard (fresh or frozen); fennel (roasted or in stews); sweet potatoes, squash, carrots (whole, not baby carrots!), parsnips.
• Heat-caramelized veggies are a great way to satisfy your sweet tooth: Toss them with olive oil, add a little salt and pepper, and roast them in an oven or on a cast-iron skillet.

2) Swap night-time TV watching for some other low-key, constructive or creative activity, even if it's just for a half hour and one night a week to start.

• Use the time to read, write, journal, declutter an area (like your fridge).
• Take a bath, do some yoga or stretching, or indulge in other self-care activities.
• Options like vision boarding, guided meditations or journaling can prime you for rich, insight-provoking dreams.

Get resources and other helpful links at livingexperiment.com/winter.

Shame is universal. It touches every age, gender, and ethnicity — from a child who wets the bed to a presidential candidate who is caught off guard in a debate. Shame operates at your core, often playing out in a debilitating combination of aggression, withdrawal, and perfectionism. But how can you address shame if you have difficulty acknowledging or talking about it? In this week's episode of The Living Experiment, we discuss shame openly, flushing it out of hiding and into the light of day. We talk about where shame comes from, how men and women feel it differently, and how it impacts relationship dynamics. We also suggest steps to shift from shame toward self-acceptance and insight.

• The life-long and inescapable human condition of shame (3:25)
• Defining (and differentiating) shame and guilt (6:30)
• The three primary behavioral expressions of shame (7:25)
• Secondary and tertiary consequences, including communication problems (7:50)
• The subtle differences between imposing shame and offering compassionate guidance (10:00)
• How shame that develops very early in life can manifest in our adult lives and relationships (12:50)
• Perfectionism as a response to childhood shame (14:25)
• Shame as a potential outcome of a religious upbringing (15:15)
• How your own sense of worth influences the way you accept or judge others (17:55)
• Dr. Marilee Adams' "Choice Map" and the two paths — judger or learner — we can take in any stressful situation (18:45)
• Gender-specific shame triggers and responses (23:55)
• Dallas's early experience with shame, and the shadow it cast (26:00)
• Pilar's experience of shame resulting from childhood sexual abuse (29:50)
• How (and why) we make sense of irrational thoughts and situations, and why that's not always healthy (31:00)
• How shame shows up in human behavior (33:50)
• Dr. Brené Brown's outing of the universal, destructive experience of shame (37:45)
• Shame-based morality vs. the natural consequences of potentially problematic actions, such as over-consumption of porn or food (38:45)
• The power of acknowledging and exposing sources and feelings of shame (42:20)
• How Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) therapy can help people evolve traumatic experiences (44:20)
• "De-cloaking" — risking the truth about yourself with close friends, and the positive feedback loop that can create (47:10)
• How to re-frame and diminish shame with self-awareness and compassion (53:00)
• Making peace with your life experiences — good and bad — to more fully understand and accept yourself and others for who they are (55:40)
• How a difficult divorce can catalyze the work of self-discovery (57:25)
• The vicious cycle of poor communication between men and women – women's unarticulated desires leading to men's misguided efforts to fulfill them — and how to reverse the pattern (1:00:00)
• Framing failure without shame rather than denying failure happened (1:05:00)
• Suggested experiments for the week (1:08:20)

Dallas suggests: Identify and compassionately acknowledge your shame.

• On a piece of paper, write "I have shame about . . ." and list all of your feelings of shame. On the last line of the page, write, "And it's OK."
• Calling shame by its name and accepting yourself sets the stage for growth.

Pilar suggests: In the moments you feel shame, change the questions you ask.

• The next time you're tempted to go down a path of self-retribution (e.g, why am I so stupid; what's wrong with me; what will people think?), ask neutral, non-judging learner questions such as: "What just happened?" "What's useful here?" "What do I want now?" "What would I like to have happen?" "What can I learn?" "What am I actually responsible for?" "What's possible?" "What are my choices?" "What would be the best use of my time, energy, and attention now?"
• Embrace shame-tinged experiences as fertile ground for growth and self-honoring rather than self-reproach.
• Look for opportunities to reframe shame-based experiences from your early life to reclaim your sense of worth as a human being now.

Get resources and other helpful links at livingexperiment.com/shame.

Sitting on our butts — it's something most of us do for hours on end. We sit at our desks and in meetings. We sit while parked in front of screens at home. We sit while eating, drinking and socializing. We sit while driving cars and riding in planes and trains and — well, pretty much everywhere, most of the time.

Given how much of our lives we spend sitting, it's worth knowing how it affects our bodily systems — not just our musculoskeletal health, but our metabolism, biochemistry, and more.

One expert quoted in The Washington Post asserts that after 30 minutes of sitting, your metabolism can slow by as much 90 percent, and that after two hours, the good cholesterol in your blood stream can drop 20 percent. Yikes!

So in this week's episode of The Living Experiment, we offer insights into the damage done by prolonged sitting, plus an explanation for why simply swapping sitting for standing isn't an ideal solution, and some simple, doable ways to keep your body in motion at healthy intervals throughout the day.

• "Sitting (and maybe standing?) is the new smoking" – seeing beyond conflicting and confusing headlines (2:50)
• Why the real problem is being too sedentary for too long – and why extended bouts of standing, while better than sitting, still spell trouble (4:00)
• The motion-based muscular contractions required for your circulatory system to return blood to your heart (5:30)
• The chronic musculoskeletal imbalances that arise from being too still for too long (7:50)
• Why unseen postural muscles matter, and the importance of their endurance, not just their strength (10:05)
• The vicious cycle of sitting in a chair and decreasing endurance (11:00)
• Yoga and ball chairs – litmus tests (and training tools) for postural-muscle stamina (12:00)
• Mushy abs, a weak back, feeble gluteal muscles and tight hip flexors — the high costs of chair time (12:45)
• Sitting's impact on your upper body – a concave chest, shallow breathing, and a craned neck position (15:15)
• The "medicalization" of poor lifestyle practices and "the tyranny of the diagnosis" that dissuades us from addressing the real root causes of our health problems (16:20)
• The hormonal and metabolic pitfalls of a sedentary lifestyle, and the hazardous combination of sitting a lot and eating a carb-heavy, high- refined-grain diet (17:25)
• How even very short periods of movement can have giant positive effects on insulin sensitivity (19:30)
• Potential benefits of shifting to a standing desk or sit-to-stand desk (24:10)
• The bare-minimum frequency at which you need to be moving (25:00)
• A shout-out to the "Pause" episode of The Living Experiment, and how to leverage your ultradian rhythms for more regular activity breaks (25:45)
• Creating a standing desk from available stuff, or advocating for healthier office accessories (27:15)
• How to incorporate standing or walking into work meetings (28:45)
• The big picture: Planning your next life move in favor of your health, happiness and satisfaction (33:10)
• Suggested experiments for the week (35:25)

Dallas suggests:

Establish a rule: If you're going to watch TV or play video games, stand up while doing so.

• From a standing position, you'll find yourself moving around more often – you simply won't want to stand stationary for the full duration of a one-hour show.
• If you're standing while watching, you'll also be far less inclined to consume passive entertainments for prolonged periods.

Pilar suggests:

Take a look at the environments where you spend most of your time seated – both at work and at home – and evaluate how you might be able to adjust or redesign those spaces to encourage more frequent and regular movement.

• Create a standing work station in your office by stacking up books or bringing in a platform.
• Set out a yoga mat, kettle bell, bands, or weights near where you work to inspire you to incorporate movement into your day.
• At home, assess how your entertainment area is set up: If your living room is designed around watching TV, that's what you're going to do. Rearrange your furniture to encourage conversation, reading, cuddling, doing creative projects or looking outside instead.

If you're enjoying The Living Experiment, please tell your friends about it (check out the "Share This" widget and other social-media tools on this page). People are always looking for great new podcasts, and your personal recommendations mean a lot.

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• "Don't Just Sit There" — a roundup of sitting's impacts on your body via The Washington Post.
• Also from The Washington Post, a piece on Healthy Limits for Sitting, which includes some great data on biochemical impacts of sitting.
• From Experience Life magazine, why Standing May Be as Bad as Sitting.
• A study, "Physical Activity and Insulin Sensitivity" showing that the total amount of activity performed over a day has more effect on insulin resistance than the intensity of exercise.
• The "Pause" Episode of The Living Experiment, on recognizing and respecting your body's "I-need-a-break" signals.
• "Workday Workouts" – a series of invigorating activities that turn wasted moments into body-strengthening mini-workouts, via Experience Life magazine.
• Get Up: Why Your Chair is Killing You and What You Can Do About It, a book by James Levine, MD, codirector of the Mayo Clinic-Arizona State University obesity initiative.
• "Move" — a free app that reminds you (at regular, selected intervals) to get up and do simple, randomly-chosen exercises from the collection you choose.
• A great book by Dr. Jeff Bland (Pilar referenced his phrase "the tyranny of the diagnosis"): The Disease Delusion: Conquering the Causes of Chronic Illness

• Sign up for The Living Experiment newsletter so you can stay up to date with us, get free gifts, and receive new-show notifications (plus highlights) as soon as each new episode is released.
• Subscribe to The Living Experiment on iTunes to have fresh episodes delivered to your podcast feed each week.
• Check out Dallas Hartwig's More Social Less Media Program for cues for creatively, spontaneously, meaningfully connecting with people while also re-evaluating your level of media consumption.

We live in a culture that encourages us to consume far more than we create. That's a dynamic that directly undermines both our health and happiness. Learn why, and how you can achieve a more empowering balance.

Creativity — whether preparing a delicious meal or exchanging witty banter with an old friend — can bring deep satisfaction. Consumption — whether enjoying a fine wine or a riveting Game of Thrones episode — can also be a delightful experience.

But when creativity- and consumption-based pleasures get out of balance in our lives, our health and happiness start to suffer. Giving without receiving can be exhausting, while consuming without producing can feel aimless.

In this week's episode of The Living Experiment, we explore the dynamic relationship between creativity and consumption, the historic events that have led to our modern-day imbalance, and some strategies for establishing a healthier equilibrium.

• Defining, in thought-provoking terms, the key concepts of consumption (3:05) and creation (3:35)
• Dallas's observations of behavior changes in people on the Whole30 program, and how they inspired his interest in the creativity/consumption dynamic (4:40)
• The virtuous cycle of making positive changes that boost your self-confidence (8:10)
• An evolutionary mismatch: how our DNA is hardwired for a balance of creativity and consumption very different from how we're living today (9:50)
• How Pilar's personal experience of the consumption/creativity imbalance motivated her to create Experience Life magazine, and the confirming feedback she got from readers (10:35)
• A historical overview of the shift from creation to consumption (12:40)
• The Agricultural Revolution, and how it changed our fundamental rhythms of life (14:25)
• The impact of trade and transactional relationships on the rise of consumerism – "What can I get for myself from you?" (15:05)
• The Industrial Revolution, and how mechanized production translated to less work for more goods, creating the economic forces that shaped consumer society (15:40)
• How the overconsumption of stuff has led us to want more of everything and affected our interpersonal relationships (18:00)
• The evolutionary drivers behind the desire to accumulate things (19:35)
• The inverse relationship between creation and consumption, and the damage caused by mindless overconsumption (22:15)
• How changing one small thing, whether nutrition, activity, sleep or mindset, can lead to profound life transformation (23:40)
• Meditation as a means of combating harmful consumption patterns (24:10)
• The dopamine loop activated by digital experiences, and how instant gratification creates a need for increasingly amped-up rewards (24:50)
• Research on how simple, hands on tasks can help counteract addictive tendencies (27:30)
• Lessons of the "trust-fund rat study" — how rats that didn't have to work to find their food ended up more sick, fat, and depressed than rats that did (29:40)
• Upgrading your media consumption (31:45)
• Dallas's "More Social Less Media" program – balancing creative social interaction with mindful media intake (33:15)
• The value of examining our effort to get love and affection from other people (34:40)
• Why cooking a meal with another person can be a profoundly uplifting experience (36:55)
• Suggested experiments for the week (38:20)

Dallas suggests:

Identify one or two places where you mindlessly over-consume, and pick a creative replacement activity instead.

• Examples: Join a book club, plant a vegetable garden, pick up a musical instrument, or write in a journal.
• "If your goal is 'reduce consumption,' be more creative; if your goal is 'be more creative,' reduce consumption."

Pilar suggests:

1) Reduce your in-car media consumption, and instead make a creative effort to drive with exceptional kindness and generosity.

• Minimize dependence on music, news, texting, and phone-based interactions.
• Drive with the most awareness and thoughtfulness you can muster; rather than thinking about others as obstacles in your way, be on the lookout for how you can assist and support others during your commute.
• Examples: Anticipate people who might be trying to merge into your lane, slow down, and wave them in; make up kind and compassionate stories about the iffy behaviors of other drivers.
• Recognize that you can choose the attitude you want to adopt in any given moment, and how this gives you the opportunity to improve your own and others' experiences.

2) Swap some TV time in favor of an activity that improves your personal environment or quality of life.

• Invest at least part of your habitual media-consumption time (even a half hour) in the service of your own happiness. Look for some small way you can creatively contribute to own real-life daily experience or sense of wellbeing instead.
• Examples: Declutter a messy area, reorganize and arrange the bedside table to be more beautiful, vacuum out the silverware drawer, or clear out long-expired spices or supplements. Deal with some small annoyance or toleration you've been putting off.

If you're enjoying The Living Experiment, please tell your friends about it (check out the "Share This" widget and other social-media tools on this page). People are always looking for great new podcasts, and your personal recommendations mean a lot.

We'd also love to have you connect with us on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter, share your thoughts, stories and reflections there.

• The Story of Stuff, a 20-minute, fact-filled look at the dark side of our production and consumption patterns — and the origins of our consumer economy.
• Dallas's blog article, "Porn, Shame, and Doughnuts", which digs into the psychology and physiology of addictive behaviors and instantly-available stimuli.
• The Living Experiment episode on "Addiction", which touches on how simple, creative tasks can help to overcome dependencies.
• The Trust Fund Rat Study as explained in a Scientific American article by Dr. Kelly Lambert (the study's author) exploring the link between hands-on pursuits, increased resilience and decreased depression.
• On Being, a podcast by Peadbody-Award-winning journalist Krista Tippett exploring what it means to be human and how we can live our best lives in the 21st century.
• The Minimalists Podcast — Joshua Fields Millburn and Ryan Nicodemus's ongoing discussion about living a meaningful life with less stuff.

• Sign up for The Living Experiment newsletter so you can stay up to date with us, get free gifts, and receive new-show notifications (plus highlights) as soon as each new episode is released.
• Subscribe to The Living Experiment on iTunes to have fresh episodes delivered to your podcast feed each week.
• Check out Dallas Hartwig's More Social Less Media Program for cues for creatively, spontaneously, meaningfully connecting with people while also re-evaluating your level of media consumption.

From a health perspective, what comes out of your body is every bit as important as what goes in. So we think it's high time we gave poo the respect it deserves.

Look, we know, it's an awkward topic. And that's why it's so rarely discussed among friends, lovers and family members, or even with health care professionals.

The problem is, when we don't talk about it, we don't learn about it. And when we don't learn about something as important as healthy digestion and elimination, we get into serious trouble.

That's why more than 60 million Americans suffer from constipation, and far many too many endure oppressive bowel related discomfort, toxicity and related inflammatory diseases.

So in this week's episode of The Living Experiment, we have a frank conversation about feces, defining what's "normal" — in frequency, form, and yes, even aroma. We also offer some helpful counsel on identifying and resolving common poo problems, and more.

Even if you're a little grossed out, you're not going to want to miss this essential wisdom for improving your digestive process, your elimination experience, and your overall health.

• How your poop reflects your health, and relates to the condition of your skin (7:00)
• Some basics about frequency, effort and more (8:10)
• The relationship between your diet (especially fiber) and your defecation (11:10)
• How a lack of dietary fiber undermines elimination, causing recirculation of polluted bile, with inflammatory and cholesterol-raising results (11:35)
• The surprising range of serious health conditions that can develop from poor elimination and overstressed detox pathways (12:15)
• How gas, belching, and bad breath can result from waste that ferments in your gut for too long (13:40)
• A word on microbiome disruption and Dr. Elson Haas's graphic warning against letting methane gas build up in your system (14:20)
• Using the Bristol Stool Chart to assess the shape, texture, and quality of your poo (16:10)
• Signs and causes of constipation, including stress and food intolerance (18:05)
• The German "poop shelf" and the value of examining your stool (20:20)
• GI tests as a diagnostic tool for identifying the underlying causes of digestive and skin problems, allergies, and asthma (21:20)
• Tips on what you can do about constipation and diarrhea – food, fiber, water, and fat intake (22:45)
• Examining the effect of your stress, lifestyle, and schedule on your bowel movements (24:40)
• Ramifications of not going when you first feel the urge to go (24:55)
• The smelly signals poo sends (29:00)
• Some pro-poo minerals (32:05)
• The interdependence of sleep, stress, and GI motility (33:10)
• Experiments for the week (38:50)

Pilar suggests:

1) Incorporate a good-sized serving of fresh, non-starchy, leafy-green, or other fibrous vegetables with each meal of the day.

• Fiber is essential for moving things along and for escorting polluted bile out of your system.
• Examples: Add a handful of fresh greens or sautéed kale to your breakfast. For lunch, add a salad or a side order of vegetables. For dinner, add an additional serving of vegetables prepared in some yummy way.

2) Notice and immediately respect your body's first-inkling signal that you need to poop.

• Whenever you notice the urge to go, go right then. Don't delay, allow yourself to distracted, avoid it, or wait for a more convenient time.
• Ignoring or de-prioritizing your body's signals can lead to constipation and significantly undermine your health.

Dallas suggests:

1) Drink at least one to two glasses of lukewarm water within 15 minutes of waking up in the morning;

• Drinking warm water in the morning — ideally, before coffee — improves GI health and hydration, facilitating elimination with zero effort, zero cost.

2) Consider using a Squatty Potty.

• The Squatty Potty is a small platform that elevates your feet on either side of the toilet, allowing you to get into a more natural squatting position for easier and more complete bowel movements.

If you're enjoying The Living Experiment, please tell your friends about it (check out the "Share This" widget and other social-media tools on this page). People are always looking for great new podcasts, and your personal recommendations mean a lot.

We'd also love to have you connect with us on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter, share your thoughts, stories and reflections there.

• From Experience Life magazine, Overcoming Constipation (great general overview).
• Also from Experience Life, Fiber: Why It Matters More Than You Think (includes a detailed explanation of the role of bile, hepatic recycling, connections to gallstones, heart disease and more).
• Pooping 101, a helpful article from SCD Lifestyle - includes a good explanation of the Bristol Stool Chart.
• The Stool Analyzer, an interactive tool (based, in part, on the Bristol Stool Chart) to help you evaluate your bowel movements and what they mean.
• The Squatty Potty, mentioned in one of Dallas's recommended experiments.

Can you ever have "enough" — money, time, energy, love? Do you trust that you will have enough in the future? Do you believe you are enough, right now, just as you are?

Your answers to those questions can have a profound influence on your health and happiness.

In this week's episode of The Living Experiment, we examine the opposing mentalities of scarcity and abundance. We explore how they affect our experiences in the present moment, and how they can impact our future.

Research suggests that worrying about "not enough" — or even focusing on on imaginary "not enough" scenarios — can reduce both our available IQ and our ability to respond to real-life challenges.

As Pilar says, "scarcity mentality tends to produce scarcity results." That's why we're excited to offer up insights and experiments to help you evolve your mindset in more rewarding directions.

• The scarcity-fear connection, and its hidden costs (2:45)
• Why scarcity thinking is almost always about the future (3:30)
• Research by a Harvard economist shows how even imagining scarcity scenarios can undermine your mental capacity (4:40)
• Scarcity as a self-fulfilling prophecy: How fear of "not enough" sets you up to lose (5:45)
• Discovering the origins of scarcity mentality in childhood experiences (7:10)
• Why grasping for love, attention, and affection tends to alienate, rather than attract, other people (10:20)
• The physiological underpinnings of scarcity — including the effect of stress-escalated cortisol and adrenaline (11:10)
• Scarcity and self-worth — the shame inherent in feeling inadequate (15:00)
• Connecting with a mindset of abundance, in which there's enough for you and everybody else, and everyone can win (16:00)
• Pinpointing where your anxieties lie and connecting them to scarcity-based beliefs (18:00)
• How mass-media sows discontent and can slay our self-esteem (19:00)
• Pilar's experience of measuring her body against an unachievable feminine ideal — even as a small child (19:45)
• The "never enough" machine: How consumerism drives perennial dissatisfaction (20:20)
• Dallas shares his experience of challenging the rational basis of another person's fiscal anxieties, and the inherent narcissism in being obsessed about scarcity (21:00)
• What a person with an abundance mentality looks like, and how it feels to be that person (25:30)
• Shame/vulnerability researcher Brené Brown's concept of sufficiency (27:10)
• How rushing conveys scarcity — how to be more present with your family by changing your point of view about time (31:15)
• Simple mantras to connect you with the abundance you already have (35:30)
• Dispelling scarcity via Byron Katie's process of self-inquiry; her four key reality-challenging questions (38:00)
• Practicing presence and gratitude by acting as if you have enough and asking "What am I missing?" (41:00)

Dallas suggests: Explore and reframe your scarcity-driven feelings.

• Notice when you begin to experience a negative emotion of fear, worry, anxiety, or stress.
• Ask yourself whether that feeling is rooted in some perception or projection of scarcity — the notion that you somehow aren't enough or will not have enough of one thing or another — whether now, or at some time in the future.
• If the answer is yes (and it almost always is), challenge that belief by saying, out loud or to yourself: "Right here, right now, it's enough. Right here, right now, I'm enough for me."
• Try that reality on, and see how it feels.

Pilar suggests: 1) Adopt a posture of plenty; and 2) ask, "What am I missing?"

• Pick a moment when you are inclined to feel scarcity, whether around money, time, attention, affection, or any other area.
• Notice how that feeling inclines you to physically and emotionally contract. Decide to instead hold your body in a posture of plenty and generosity.
• Uncross your arms and legs, lean forward, allow your face and neck to relax, soften your eyes, unclench your hands, breathe slowly and deeply — as though you have plenty of everything and nothing to fear.
• Notice how adopting this different posture shifts your experience and perception, particularly if you're relating to another person.
• Another experiment: Ask yourself the question "What am I missing?" in two different senses.
  • 1) What am I longing for in this moment; what do I really most want and need? (Hint: It may be something other than what you originally thought you were craving.)
  • 2) What good things am I not seeing? What positive experiences or opportunities are available to me in the present moment that I may have overlooked?
• Getting real about what you actually want and need (vs. chasing some second-best thing) and noticing what you currently have can help you challenge scarcity-based perceptions and enjoy a more positive present-moment experience.

Visit livingexperiment.com for links to Resources!

In this week's episode of The Living Experiment, we dig into the fundamentals of Paleo and Primal eating approaches — their origins, similarities, and differences, plus practical steps for integrating them into the way you eat today.

We also examine the modern nutritional reductionism that led us to think about food as merely a sum of its parts (macronutrients, calories, and so on) rather than considering the value and integrity of whole foods in their natural state.

In addition to evaluating the differences between Paleo and Primal dietary strategies, we explore their key principles in the context of the larger ancestral nutrition movement — arguably the most significant dietary trend of the past two decades.

Contrasting the hunter-gatherer diets our ancestors consumed for most of human history (2.6 million years) with the more processed and grain-heavy diets we've embraced over the past 10,000 years, we offer up insights about why some foods seem to reliably produce health and vitality, while others consistently produce distress and disease.

• How Michael Pollan figures in — and our personal Pollan stories (3:00)
• Why most humans tend to thrive on ancestrally-inspired diets (7:40)
• A brief history of the Paleo movement and the influencers who helped shape it (11:50)
• Guiding principles for eating within Paleo and Primal frameworks (14:30)
• Commonalities between Paleo and Primal, and key nuances that distinguish them (16:55)
• How commercial, industrialized, processed "Paleo" foods have diluted the Paleo movement (18:25)
• Focusing on the 85% we agree on — vs. the 15% we fight about (19:00)
• Signs of hope on the food landscape, and reasons to be wary (24:30)
• Ancestral-diet disharmony: Eggs — included in most ancestral diets, and a common modern-world allergen (27:00)
• The importance of individual self-experimentation over rigid dietary dictates (28:10)
• The common-ground essentials of ancestral eating — what's in, what's out, and what's still the subject of debate (dairy, alcohol, legumes, etc.) (29:40)
• Why even healthy foods can cause serious digestive and immune problems for some people, and the importance of respecting your own system (35:15)
• The difference between short- and long-term dietary interventions, and the importance of tracking your body's response over time (38:00)
• Why focusing primarily on weight loss rarely leads to sustainable health improvement (43:10)
• Our response to "just tell me what to eat!" — a hierarchy of ancestrally-inspired food recommendations that work for most people, most of the time, over the long haul (45:00)
• Recommended experiments (54:15)

Dallas encourages listeners to take on the Whole30 nutritional program:

• The 30-day, intensive experiment will help you discover the healing power of whole foods, and help you explore which foods do or do not agree with your body.
• Eliminate common problem foods (see Whole30 site, link below, for instructions) for 30 days. Over the subsequent weeks, systematically reintroduce them while noting how each affects you.
• Consider doing the experiment with a friend for better support and motivation.

Pilar suggests going a week without grains or sugars:

• Remove all grains and added sugars from your diet (not just flour-and-starch-based products like bread, pasta, cookies, and crackers, but also whole-kernel grains like rice, quinoa, and millet).
• Replace them with extra servings of brightly colored vegetables, which deliver healthy complex carbohydrates, plus fiber and anti-inflammatory, pro-healing phytonutrients.
• Notice how replacing high-glycemic foods with high-nutrition ones helps balance your blood sugar, improves your energy, and reduces cravings while also improving your overall sense of well-being.

If you're enjoying The Living Experiment, please tell your friends about it (just click the "share this" tool on this page). People are always looking for great new podcasts, and your personal recommendations mean a lot. We'd also love to have you connect with us on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter, share your thoughts, stories and reflections there.

• Great stuff from author, food and agriculture expert Michael Pollan, plus his seminal The New York Times Magazine article, "Power Steer"
• Loren Cordain's movement-launching book, The Paleo Diet
• The Difference Between Primal and Paleo as articulated by Mark Sisson, author of The Primal Blueprint.
• A simple chart contrasting Paleo and Primal eating, via the Saving Dinner blog.
• Paleo-movement pioneer Robb Wolf
• Pilar's informative video interview with David Ludwig, MD, PhD (Harvard Medical School nutrition professor and author of Always Hungry) on the importance of whole-food, nutrient dense, fat-friendly eating.
• The Whole30 website and the The Whole30 book
• Not mentioned in the show, but significant in laying some groundwork for the Paleo and Primal movements: Work by Sally Fallon Morell, Mary Enig, Weston Price and others.

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Wrapping up our successful first season, we offer a big picture view of what we see as the top 10 fundamentals of healthy, happy living, and how they fit into five key domains of wellbeing. We point out some of the essential connections between all these considerations, and we explain why each of them matters — especially those elements commonly overlooked or underemphasized by the conventional media. If you're looking for a quick tour of what healthy living looks and feels like, you've come to the right place.

Episode Highlights:

• Pilar outlines five dimensions of health and healthy living (4:40)
• Dallas and Pilar share their top 10 biggies (fundamentals for being the most vital human you can be), in no particular order (7:40)
• #1: Whole food nutrition and hydration (8:00)
• #2: Rest and recovery (10:20)
• #3: Healthy movement (12:00)
• #4: Face-to-face intimate social connection (16:25)
• #5: Empowered role in directing and managing your own healthcare (19:35)
• #6: Minimal exposure to toxic chemicals, environments and relationships (25:10)
• #7: Appropriate balance of stress/challenge and recovery/repair opportunity (29:00)
• #8: Positive growth-and-learning mindset (32:15)
• #9: Time in nature and the outdoors (35:50)
• #10: Conscious, discerning relationship with media and marketing (39:00)
• The art of conducting (and being) your own "living experiment" (43:55)

Share the love!

If you're enjoying The Living Experiment, please tell your friends about it (just click the "share this" tool on this page). People are always looking for great new podcasts, and your personal recommendations mean a lot. We'd also love to have you connect with us on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter, share your thoughts, stories and reflections there.

Resources:

• Pilar's "101 Revolutionary Ways to be Healthy" (you can explore them all and access the free mobile app here, too!).
• Pilar's "Revolutionary Acts" column in Experience Life
• Dallas's More Social, Less Media program
• Byron Katie's "The Work" for developing a healthier, more conscious mindset.
• The learner/judger Choice Map from Dr. Marilee Adams and the Inquiry Institute.
• Articles from Experience Life magazine on all of the Top-10 Biggies (search on the topics of interest to you).

PLUS ...

• Sign up for our newsletter so you can stay up to date with us and receive new-show highlights as soon as they're published.
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